Decision time between two jobs and don't know what to do!

[Hungrycaterpillarsmummy]

As the title says. Summary:

Current company - been there almost 5 years with a job switch on July because the first job was just getting too crazy busy and stressful with poor management. Nee job is ok but they've got me working two areas and I'm due to pick up a third soon - already struggling to keep up and I have mentioned I think it's too much for one person. Was told it should be manageable from management however every other person at my level agrees it's too much and has never been done before with one person.
However, it is variable, fast paced, could be good if there's a handle on material and stuff.
Pension is amazing
Pay is good
I work 4 days condensed hours = 32 hours (have Friday off to look after my children)
They are very flexible employers.

New company:
Have worked there before in a different role and did really enjoy it.
Is a payrise although not a huge one.
Won't accept 4 days or condensed hours so I have to put kids to childcare and I'd work the Friday.
Childcare won't be fully covered by my payrise but next year our youngest gets free hours so then we'd be absolutely fine (so short term tighten belts)
I do struggle with the kids on a Friday.
Job will be less stressful I think.
Bonus is higher
Share scheme is better.

So how the hell do I decide what to do?! It's crunch time now as if I am leaving I need to hand my notice in on Monday.
Help!

Oh also:
My eldest will starts school next year so I don't think I'll struggle so much one I have one at school.

I'd stay where you are because of the flexibility, especially with your son starting school.

The flexibility is worth a lot, especially if one of you children are sick.

Get a page, make 4 columns.
Do pros and cons of job 1, and pros and cons of job 2.

Have a look at the page and you should visually be able to see the right choice, and keep the page!

Another option is talking to your current employer and tell them your concerns and that you have been offered another job with more money and you are considering it.

If it were me I’d feel as though I was swapping one thing that wasn’t great for another that wasn’t. Don’t underestimate flexibility. I left an employer earlier in the year who was incredibly flexible, for one that is not. And that dictates the culture. I’ve missed out on time with my children that I won’t get back. Like you this employer wanted 5 days and it’s had such an impact on my mental health, not getting that one day off. Are you excited by the prospect of the new role? If not I’d probably stay put for something else.

If I hadn't just started the new role, and been in my initial role at company I'd take the new company job hands down.
But now I'm in the new role there's nothing really swaying me to the new one.
If I worked five days at current company there is not much difference in pay between that and the new offer.

The only thing is current industry is oil and gas - always riding out risks of redundancies. New industry is pharmaceutical which is fairly safe.

What are your career aspirations and which is the better opportunity in the long run? If it's neither I would stay put and try for something more suitable and beneficial.

Tbh I just want to be in a job I like, get to be a subject matter expert and then maybe go a step or two up. I'm not doing badly for myself.
Short term current company have more opportunities but long term it would be the second company.

My husband works at the second one and he has said he thinks I could negotiate 4 days further down the line

I do struggle with the kids on a Friday.
Job will be less stressful I think.

How much do you value the Friday off?
Because this sounds like you find the Friday with the kids stressful, and actually working that extra day might suit you better. If the job is also less stressful that may mean easier time all round.

Both jobs at current company have ended up with high workload and management that don’t recognise it. That’s a bit of a red flag.

You definitely could use the offer to negotiate a pay rise where you are, if that would offset the workload and stress issues

I'm going to value it once both kids are at school lol
My eldest goes to school next year so it's basically another year of having stressful Fridays and then once he's at school I just need to manage with one child which I think will be fine.

I had a chat with current employer today and he said he can't give me any more money as I'm already the highest paid in that group and it sounded like he had a fight with HR to get me.

So yes short term Friday at work and less stressful job would make my life better.
But this current role is ok and obviously I'm still fairly new but I'm getting on well in it.