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CF at work. How would you cope with this?

6 replies

WheresMyOrder · 29/09/2023 15:12

Hi everyone, I'd appreciate any thoughts on this situation.

I've been working for a small company for nearly two years. It's a small team and it was tough at first because there were some difficult personalities to deal with (that I hadn't been forewarned about when I should have been).

The issue I now have is an ongoing power struggle I'm trying to disengage from! A member of the team doesn't report to me, which is not a problem for me, but they're proving to be a real pain in the arse (apologies but am at the end of the line with it). They're constantly interrupting me in meetings, setting me up in meetings ("oh I think the team want to discuss this" when we have already agreed a course of action) and going off on tangents about what we could deliver as a service when their role is nothing to do with that.
The other issue I have, more seriously, is that they have no time management skills. They leave everything to the last minute and interrupt me when they need something done last minute- they're never small things, always reports etc. I am trying to manage that.

They seem incapable of stepping back and doing their own job. It's very clear that they're a bit of a control freak - based on the stories they tell - but it's also very clear that they seem to bounce from one topic to another with no clear plan.
Before I joined they had stepped in to look after the team whilst recruitment was going on.

I am sick to death of it. Senior leadership are not good at dealing with this. Their mindset is that everything's working great because they are so distant from it. I've now been told that this person has told senior leadership they think I'm leaving. I am not. I have no idea where that comes from.
Is it worth staying or should I just move on?
Have you ever had this situation and how did you deal with it?

OP posts:
tankenti · 29/09/2023 16:57

Do you run these meetings?

Set a strict agenda before hand. If they derail say 'sorry CF but we only have time for wants on the agenda' and go straight back to the agenda

You can always say 'I haven't finished yet' and just repeat this. Also if you have a friendly work colleague you can request they say 'op wasn't finished yet.'

WheresMyOrder · 29/09/2023 17:57

Thanks, @tankenti, I have done this many many times. I'm not a rude person in any way so it's difficult for me to just keep talking but I've had to do it. I also feel like it looks juvenile to have us both talking at the same time! I feel like they're making us look ridiculous.

OP posts:
AliciaLime · 29/09/2023 18:03

They sound like a nightmare. Have you spoken to their manager about it? Also about the rumour you’re leaving?

Peacendkindness · 29/09/2023 18:22

I haven’t finished yet

please don’t interrupt it happens a lot and it disrupts the flow

if you want to bring additional topics in please discuss this with me before the meeting need to focus on this now

John I am concerned by your time management can you email me a spreadsheet with your targets and deadlines on please

can you understand that you leaving this until the last minute is not fair or good working practice or respectful to your colleagues

then ….

John you did this at the last meeting

  • I am reminding you what this meeting is for …

John you have now done this at the last 3 meetings please can I insist you stop derailing meetings by asking for different things to be interrupted

every time back up with an email

eg John you interrupted todays meeting with x idea which was out of the remit. I am happy to hear your ideas but at the correct time and place. Please ensure you follow the correct protocol thanks Jane

etc all the time

they do listen in the end

Peacendkindness · 29/09/2023 18:23

WheresMyOrder · 29/09/2023 17:57

Thanks, @tankenti, I have done this many many times. I'm not a rude person in any way so it's difficult for me to just keep talking but I've had to do it. I also feel like it looks juvenile to have us both talking at the same time! I feel like they're making us look ridiculous.

Firm and speak slower but louder

Peacendkindness · 29/09/2023 18:23

Keep repeatedi g it when they are talking over you

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