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WIBU to confront my manager?

111 replies

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 06:51

I started a new job at the end of July. I work nights, my manager works days. I’ve only seen her in person twice since I started the job, once at my induction and once at a team meeting during the day. Last week I was off sick, with a flare up of a long term chronic health condition. I told my manager about this when I was employed as my condition is classed as a disability. I tried to call in on Monday but the phone lines were down, so I emailed her and explained and I told her that I would let her know when I was ready to return to work, no problems. I returned to work last night, having completed my return to work interview via phone. There was an envelope waiting on the office desk with the RTW form for me to sign. In it she has mentioned that I failed to call in on a daily basis and must do so in future. I was a bit miffed because she didn’t mention this on the phone or when I called in, but okay. Bit OTT in my opinion, but fine if that’s procedure. However I then sat down to read the minutes from the weekly team meeting on the Wednesday I was off. ( Night staff don’t get a team meeting, we are just expected to read the minutes posted on a notice board). In it she informs the team that another staff member has left, and then on the line below -

”Disillusioned - no idea what’s happening with her?”

I’m furious. Number one, she knows full well that I was off sick, and why. Number two, why was that being discussed at a team meeting? It’s none of anybody else’s business why I’m off sick, my absence has no direct impact on the day team, I’ve never worked with them or even met all but one of them!!

WIBU to mention this to my manager?

OP posts:
Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:11

At that point she’d had no idea you weee off sick because you had t managed to get hold of her

were you off the entire week?

Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:11

But interesting your thought is to “confront” your boss rather than… have a chat

Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:14

bit ott In my opinion

to ring in every day is not ott. It’s standard

Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:14

Is there not a night manager?

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:21

I had spoken to her on the Monday via email as the phones were down. The meeting was on the Wednesday.

OP posts:
Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:21

It’s just a word. Obviously I’m not going to go in all guns blazing, but I’m not happy about it at all.

OP posts:
Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:22

I’ve never work anywhere where a daily call in is needed when off sick.

OP posts:
Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:22

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:22

I’ve never work anywhere where a daily call in is needed when off sick.

Well you do now

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:22

No, no night manager.

OP posts:
Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:23

Clearly. That’s not the issue here though is it?

OP posts:
Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:23

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:21

I had spoken to her on the Monday via email as the phones were down. The meeting was on the Wednesday.

You hadn’t spoken to her

you had emailed her

you were off all last week and didn’t bother to ring in once

Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:23

After your failed attempt on Monday

Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:24

You work somewhere with a reasonable and common rule that you think is OTT so after an attempt on Monday - you then didn’t bother to contact.

Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:25

So each day - she has no idea whether you’d be in or not

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:25

The phones were down. We spoke via email. I said to her that I would call when I was ready to return to work, she replied confirming that was fine. At no point in our email conversation did she ask me to call daily.

OP posts:
SoSad44 · 26/09/2023 07:26

Well it is a bit weird that you emailed once and didn’t get in touch the whole week. In most workplaces you update daily unless the sick time is clear from the start (one week recovery from an operation for example). I think you need to have a chat but definitely don’t go in all defensive as you are in the wrong too.

icelollycraving · 26/09/2023 07:27

You said you’d let them know when you were going to be back but hadn’t given any indication. You sound quite aggressive in your tone tbh. No one needs that in a team.

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:30

But I wasn’t made aware of this policy at any point, including at the time I contacted her and had a conversation with her about me being off. How can I follow a policy that I’m not aware exists?

OP posts:
Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:32

As I said, I wasn’t aware of that policy having never been informed of it. I’ve never had a job with that policy before, and I certainly have never expected it of any of anybody working for me. Once or twice a week yes, not every day.

OP posts:
Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:33

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:30

But I wasn’t made aware of this policy at any point, including at the time I contacted her and had a conversation with her about me being off. How can I follow a policy that I’m not aware exists?

Check your contract under sickness

it will explicitly state

as it does with mine

if it does not - then have a chat with her about it

but i suspect - it will

icelollycraving · 26/09/2023 07:33

Is it in your contract? Just say you weren’t aware of this expectation (standard as it is). No need for confrontation.

Luckydip1 · 26/09/2023 07:34

Ultimately, you work them so you have to accept their rules, personally I think it's a bit petty, but not worth leaving over.

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:35

I wouldn’t know because I haven’t been given/signed a contract yet, I don’t even know if I’m paid for time off sick. Management are completely incompetent and seem unable to fulfil basic requests or give any kind of information.

OP posts:
Nuttyroche · 26/09/2023 07:36

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:30

But I wasn’t made aware of this policy at any point, including at the time I contacted her and had a conversation with her about me being off. How can I follow a policy that I’m not aware exists?

You are a grown assed adult!

Read your contract

Disillusioned1111 · 26/09/2023 07:36

And yes, I’ve been asking for my contract every few days since I started. Apparently she’ll “get around to it”.

OP posts: