Leaving toxic workplace for something better

[whatisforteamum]

Has anyone left somewhere that was toxic or had a high turnover and gone somewhere better.
I'm loosing confidence and thinking it is me now.
Stuck in this weird parallel universe where I am the outsider.
Odd days I feel accepted like my previous jobs.Mostly not though.Help.

Just to add I'm still here.
All the roles I was offered didn't have the hours this does.
However every week something happens that reminds me I can never win.
This week a dependent had an unexpected sudden emergency I needed to get help for.Turned out to be an ambulance situation couldn't be left alone.
I emailed work as I always do for a paper trail.Couldnt phone as SIM card hadn't transferred all numbers to my new mobile.
Got shouted at the minute I arrived at work next day.!!
No how is the patient,how stressful for you.
Tbh if I had a colleague with 99 per cent attendance I would assume something drastic had happened and also check my emails .
Toxic place I need to get away and I'm still attending interviews before my MH gets worse.

I did apologise for not calling though.

Yes. I was at my old job for 3 years, I was happy, it was fine. New boss, bullied for 6 weeks, threatened and then inappropriately touched. Reported it. Denied. Told I was redundant. On Christmas Eve. I wasn't, it was a false / sham redundancy. Left.

Got new job. Local. So nice. Laughing and joking. Go out for chicken on a Friday lunchtime. So nice. Ds2 and Dh said to me last night that they were so pleased, but that this job is actually the norm, the old was not, and that this is what is a shame.

Apply. Get another job. Hand in your notice. When you get somewhere nice, you're then realise that this old toxic horrible place is not actually the norm. Please just do it.

Thank you.So pleased it worked out for you.
I know it's not normal as I left a job I loved.
I left as I couldn't do 55 HR weeks anymore.
They even asked me back.¡!!
So draining to be going the extra mile and trying to be positive if I'm honest.

Yes - and I now can't believe what I tolerated/accepted as normal at the toxic place.

Yes I can imagine.
People won't even speak where I work.
I've never in my decades experience had this.

In the slow process of transferring out. I knew in the first week it was a bad fit. Nearly all of them bitch about one another behind their back and suck up to their face. God knows what they say about me. The boundaries are non-existent. One of them has shared facts about her bum hole. You get your actual entitlements like annual leave as if you're getting an extra special treat that you should grovel in thanks for. The boss is a teenage girl. Another colleague who shrieks and trauma-dumps all day long and then gets spiteful if she's asked to do any work. I heard one of them whisper about me and I'm not sure if I was supposed to hear the whisper or not. But it's open plan so we're all on top of each other? Mandatory enforced 'fun' that's in your personal time. Weaponising weaknesses if the boss is in a bad mood.

It's been not quite a year and it's alarming how you get used to stuff that is insane. I do my best to stay out of it but the whisper day rattled me. Can't wait to leave.

I stayed for too long. It got into my head and my confidence was on the floor. I started applying elsewhere and studied up on the things that would be relevant/ practised questions loads with my husband before the interviews so i could project that confident demeanor and find ways to answer questions without giving a hint of how work actually made me feel. Got a new haircut, new dress.

I started in the new job a year and a half ago and it was exactly like coming out of an abusive relationship. My old boss would have told you I was an awful employee. My new boss loves me and gave me a signficiant salary bump on top of the inflation rise at my last review.

The problem with the toxic workplace is it becomes self fulfilling. The doubt and uncertainty and stress makes you forget things and make mistakes. Remember it is the job and not you. Get out as soon as you can.

I had staff social drinks this week and was finally able to tell some colleagues some of the things that had gone on at old job- the shouting at me while I was pregnant with bad morning sickness that I needed to buck up because it was affecting my work and it wasn't fair on the rest of the team. I still look back at that in awe because- naturally- it only had the effect of making me fall to pieces entirely and get signed off sick.

Hang in there OP and go find somewhere that values you. There really is somewhere that will.

Barleysugar86 how can you be shouted at for morning sickness.
Luckily I didn't suffer only nausea and extreme tiredness many yrs ago.
I agree that being put on edge I'm more likely to make mistakes.
When I had to jump in when boss needed time off I did really well and enjoyed it.
I can't believe it's taking so long to find something suitable.
All my previous employers were lovely so I still have hope.

Rainbowbee it's the gossip that has really got me.
Focus on the positives and stop shit stirring.
What was the whispering About.
I overheard my boss shouting about me to a manager the other month.