Office Gossip or Unfair criticism?

[KitDeLuca]

I'm one of three at manager level of a team of 12 people. All professionals in an open plan office environment. One of the newest, youngest members of the team is super keen, a bit loud and can be described as "marmite". I think she's a great addition to the team and love her energy and enthusiasm but I'm also aware she needs close supervision so she doesn't go off on the wrong track with things. One of the other managers has mentioned more than once that this junior colleague is always gossiping in the office, being negative and spreading rumours of bad news about the business. I have never witnessed this. I am in the office a lot and have been trying to observe her in action. He says she's making the other juniors worry about things and generally stirring up issues over nothing. He wants me to speak to her about her behaviour. I don't want to tell him to do it himself as I think he possibly just doesn't like her and would be too blunt. What do I do? Do I tell her gently how she may be coming across to others so she can modify her behaviour? Do I speak to the other juniors to get their views but risk tainting their opinions of their new team member if (like me) they have never seen negative behaviour from her and it's just this other manager's personal gripe?

I’d first ask him for actionable insights. What can he evidence that you can actually raise with her? Negative chat on X date observed by Y manager or reported - who was she “gossiping” to, what was the inappropriate content of the conversation? A few concrete examples of concerns ? If not, it hard to address the issue (if there is one) fairly and give new employee right to respond ,and if there is an issue, take on board and act on feedback

Yes - you need actual examples to take this forward.

I agree with pp, I’d go back to the manager with the issue and ask for evidence, and also ask why he thinks you’re the best person to raise it? Is it that she’s one of your direct reports? Or is it that you and the new employee are both in possession of a vagina?

@BranchGold I think it could well be vagina related. He thinks I'll handle it better woman to woman. I will handle it better but not for that reason. He did give me examples but they were vague and nothing I would have been concerned about. I agree with PPs that I probably need more explicit information from him and more recent concrete examples if he thinks she's still doing it. If he just has a personality clash with her what can I do to diffuse or help her through?

Yes she is my direct report. But all 3 of us managers have direct and shared responsibility for the rest of them which makes things like this awkward

If she’s officially your direct report (hard to understand from previous post) then you’d ultimately be responsible for any performance related feedback and/or disciplinary action if required? If so, as her line manger, ask for specific instances and dates/details she’s breached company guidelines/behaviour best practices expected. If not recorded, ask that they are moving forward so you can be in a position to raise as legitimate concerns as they breach conduct guidelines and/or are just harmful to how she is perceived by other senior managers and peers. Generic negative feedback will make your conversation very difficult?

Thank you that is helpful actually. I think I'm reluctant to act on his comments because I don't think I completely believe or agree with him. If there is a genuine issue with any behaviour in the team I would have no problem in addressing it. But I agree I need to start with him and ask him to clarify properly what his concerns are with examples, times dates etc Otherwise there is nothing tangible to address with her.

She sounds like me. It was very hurtful when I was pulled into a meeting and told by directors that there had been complaints that I was "whispering too much" and that I was talking about people. My personal policy is that I would never say anything behind someone's back that I wouldn't say to their face and hate gossiping.

So my advice is the same as above and ask for specific examples and times. Sometimes people do not like other people for no reason.

Update on this, I got some concrete examples from the other manager (Rob) and also witnessed a couple of things myself so I did have a quiet word with her. @anywherehollie I think she does sound like you. She wasn't "gossiping" she's very popular in the office and basically a sounding board for all the people at her level in the billing who all like to chat to her and ask her opinion on work things (positive and negative). She basically had a legitimate explanation for all of the "complaints". I'm now convinced Rob just doesn't like her. I went back to him and told him he needs to give her the benefit of the doubt she's inexperienced and he needs to work with her and see how good she is etc. This seemed to work for a while and they got along better. Fast forward to now apparently he was telling everyone at the work Christmas party that he's "written her off as she'll be leaving soon anyway." She's heard about this and is obviously upset and thinks he's trying to push her out. Aarrgh! Honestly. He is the worst gossip. What do I do with him?

Have a serious word with him. That sounds like a constructive dismissal case in the making. What an idiot.

You and rob need training in leadership skills. It’s appalling rob is trying to bully someone out and you’re so out of your depth you need to ask mumsnet how to manage.

Ha ha @Jf20 love that response
You're both right Rob is an idiot
I'll speak to him

She was relatively new in September, so no case of anything (2 years service required) unless one of the exceptions applies, and constructive dismissal isn't easy to win even when someone is eligible.

That said... @Jf20 "Rob" is playing you and her. You are dancing to his tune. To be honest, assuming she doesn't know what was said at the party, his comments are beyond the pale- you need to escalate what is clear bullying and harassment of your report to your own manager(s). To be clear, if what you say is fact, I'd be looking to discipline Rob. His actions are inappropriate on so many levels that it would be him who was looking to be leaving soon - and that wouldn't be gossip.

Sounds like Rob is the problem.

There is a similar situation in my team at work, and I would disagree with 'Rob'.

I work in a very specific area where there is the office that all of the colleagues are in together and another area that junior colleagues do a lot of their work in. I'll call it the shop floor, but it isn't.

Sometimes someone new with new opinions can rock the boat a bit, but the newish person on my team who talks a lot is well liked. There has been a lot of worry in my team recently, so we've all been talking about it a lot away from all the managers, and so maybe some of this has upset someone. They may be open to some guidance about how what they say affects others.

Have you had any feedback from the others you line manage about them, and have you talked to people on the next level down to you that you can confide in? It's what they are saying actually worrying junior members of the team, or are they hearing it and asking Rob if it is true. E.g. colleague said something is happening in the manufacturing area, and someone is going higher to find out what it is.

Thanks everyone
@user1471597558 yes I think that is very similar to what's happening here. It only seems to be Rob that has the problem with her. Everyone else thinks her being well connected and liked in the building is a good thing. I think I will speak to him again and I'll make sure the right people above us both know what's going on.

You also mentioned there were three leaders. Are you all the same level and can you talk to them? I expect they have formed their own opinion. (In my workplace, the third team leader is managing the other two, who often clash.)

Just checking that you aren't my team leader.

There are three of us at my level but Rob is one of them. The other manager of the three of us thinks the same as me that Rob just doesn't like this girl.

part of the issue too, is others could be fishing for information but then saying its x person that they originally heard it from @KitDeLuca

and it depends on the contexts and if there is any original truths to what is being said

@KitDeLuca Fan of the film Spy ? Just realised part of your username

No, ha ha Pretty Woman

"A name... you want a name... the pressure of a name... I got it! Cinde-fucking-rella!"