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Original poster

Getting revenge on colleague.

67 replies

Ihavetoleavemyjob · 05/09/2023 08:37

Not as sinister as it sounds. A colleague and I were up for a promotion. Both of us fairly equally matched. We get along mostly, but can be a little competitive with each other.

Our job requires a bit of behind the scenes work, stuff that keeps the place going, but will go unnoticed. The other half is stuff that management sees.

We have known one of us was going to be promoted to line manager of the other and both put our best foot forward.

My interview with upper management didn’t go well, I was asked about a few things that went wrong recently. I asked my boss about it and was quietly told my colleague had been blaming me for anything that went wrong (that wasn’t my fault) and sabotaged any attempt at getting promoted.

I can’t work under this person and will start looking for another job. But one part of me just wants to go and let them know why. And another wants to really screw up this persons first few months as a manager. I won’t do anything wrong, but basically be fantastic at the visible part of the job, and ignore the other aspects and let this person fall flat in her face. Basically what this person has done to me. It will also mean I get a better reference. Wwyd?

OP posts:
Autieangel · 05/09/2023 12:14

@greyhairnomore I agree but I'm assuming they are friends and that's why the boss 'helped' her. Obviously it's wrong and the boss is unprofessional but that's not the op's issue

Codlingmoths · 05/09/2023 13:33

Autieangel · 05/09/2023 12:14

@greyhairnomore I agree but I'm assuming they are friends and that's why the boss 'helped' her. Obviously it's wrong and the boss is unprofessional but that's not the op's issue

But littlegoth is right- it wasn’t helping her. She didn’t get told till too late, after being ambushed in the promotion interview. Where was her boss when these emails were being sent? Should have been sitting down with the two of them and someone else and making this person explain their accusations. Instead that person is now promoted. That’s a pretty shit kind of friend.

DontLeanOnTheKeyboard · 05/09/2023 14:48

It still isn’t clear if the op actually did the things she was accused of. If not then definitely go for a grievance, and have it looked at properly. If she did do what was raised then it’s highly likely those are the reasons she won’t get promoted. Maybe the op tried to hide her mistakes?

So many variables here.

Littlegoth · 05/09/2023 19:39

OP says in her first post that she wasn’t at fault for the things she was blamed for

DontLeanOnTheKeyboard · 05/09/2023 20:34

She says.

Original poster
Ihavetoleavemyjob · 06/09/2023 02:17

I really haven’t explained this well.

My boss had health issues and we knew well in advance she was leaving. My colleague and I knew it would be one us replacing her. We both worked very hard to be the one chosen.

When it came to the interview I was ambushed with questions about several stuff ups, none of which were my fault. I had no idea I had been blamed and didn’t know what to say.

My colleague got the promotion.

On my bosses last day she asked me what I was going to do now, I replied I would see how it goes working under my colleague and wait to be promoted to another area.

My boss said are you sure, she then pulled me aside and said you need to leave. Your colleague has been backstabbing you since she knew one of you was going to be promoted.
Boss then showed me an email the colleague had sent to my bosses boss over her concerns about my work.

My boss had only just found out what had happened when colleague was offered the job.

My boss is no longer working at the company, and my colleague is now my boss. I can’t do anything about it, as it will just sound like I am having a tantrum over not getting the job.

I was considering handing my notice on Friday and telling them an edited version of why.

Or stick around a little longer and basically behave like my colleague did.

I already made her look like an idiot on her first day. So I might just go and be happy with that.

OP posts:
Z1hun · 06/09/2023 06:35

If this is all true contact ACAS for advice on constructive dismissal. Don't do anything that can be traced back to you.

Laura0076 · 06/09/2023 06:47

Your boss who left really stirred the pot before she left didn't she.
Tbh if your going to look for another job I'd just rise above it and get on with it f0r the time you have left.
"Leaving her to fall flat on her face" is childish ... why would you purposley make someone's life more difficult... you weren't in her interview. She was likely asked the same questions. At the end of the day senior management won't of picked her because she's good at blaming someone else ...she's better for the job.. simple.
Maybe focusing on doing your job well rather than what ever it is your planning might be a better option.
Something better will come along n in the grand scheme of things this won't even matter.
Good luck in your job hunt.
Your boss who left is at fault here... she's stirring the pot between you both... and if she gas a problem with the other women... why is it you she telling to leave and not persuading the other to leave...as she will have to work with her when she comes back.

Willmafrockfit · 06/09/2023 06:51

When it came to the interview I was ambushed with questions about several stuff ups, none of which were my fault. I had no idea I had been blamed and didn’t know what to say

perhaps you didnt perform well at interview, if you didnt know what to say it sounds like it.

Paq · 06/09/2023 06:55

Don't hand your notice in until you get another job

I'd be tempted to tell everyone what your colleague did to stuff up your chances at promotion.

BanditsOnTheHorizon · 06/09/2023 07:05

Well firstly your old boss is completely shit, if he/she knew this was happening why didn't she approach you when the emails started and why didn't she also approach the colleague to discuss. That way it could have been all ironed out before the interviews started.

Will you now report into this colleague?

Do not hand your notice in, in your shoes I'd keep my head down until you get another job, but not assist the manager bit do enough to keep your reputation intact etc. When you do leave, book an appointment with HR and explain your reasons for leaving. I'm

hylian · 06/09/2023 07:13

I'm sorry that happened to you OP. The whole workplace sounds awful. Honestly, you should be thankful you didn't get the management role. Just get out of there and get a better job.

I really think you should talk yourself down with the revenge thing too. Things like that often come back to bite you. Be professional, be the adult, and just move on and leave it behind you. They'll be left to wallow in their own mess anyway.

reyran236 · 06/09/2023 07:15

Best thing to do (and I have been in a similar situation ). Be over over nice and kind. Big big smiles very outwardly supportive. Then do you exact job and only your exact job, for your exact hours. Play stupid on things outside your role. Quietly look for another job

Your new manager is waiting for a reaction? Just don't give it will blow their mind and make them paranoid!

Totalwasteofpaper · 06/09/2023 07:22

Honestly do your CV get a big payrise elsewhere and get out.

I was in a similar but different position. There were 3 people on my level.
They gave it to the least deserving/sneakiest.

Other woman quit before end of year bonus and they tried to palm me off with my bonus plus hers. I smiled and took it and the day it hit the bank i resigned for a job paying 20k more and took my talent elsewhere.

Best move i ever made.

JaiynDough · 06/09/2023 07:22

I'd exact revenge, as you put it, but I'm petty. And I'd look for another job.

Maybe you could ask on reddit for ideas on what to do, I bet you'd get some good ideas on there.

Totalwasteofpaper · 06/09/2023 07:24

And yes to @reyran236 advice. I smiled all the way out the door and did the BARE minimum whilst smiling and saying i was keen to be a good leaver and how could i help...

readingmynightaway · 06/09/2023 07:26

Is it worth it?
Looking for a new job you will want a recent reference.
Best leave and the bs.

Smellslikesummer · 06/09/2023 07:33

Or stick around a little longer and basically behave like my colleague did
I would do that to be honest (while looking for a new job)

amidsummernightsdream · 06/09/2023 07:41

It is as sinister as it sounds I’m afraid

When you were quietly told by your boss why didn’t you challenge it? Explain your perspective then?
Surely that is the adult/ professional thing to do?

Why are you just seething wanting ‘revenge’ now?

The fact that you weren’t able to put forward your point of view, advocate for yourself and articulate why your colleague was wrong speaks volumes

Seeking revenge just makes you sound childish and if that’s indicative of your approach overall maybe that’s why you weren’t promoted?

Janieforever · 06/09/2023 08:25

Ihavetoleavemyjob · 06/09/2023 02:17

I really haven’t explained this well.

My boss had health issues and we knew well in advance she was leaving. My colleague and I knew it would be one us replacing her. We both worked very hard to be the one chosen.

When it came to the interview I was ambushed with questions about several stuff ups, none of which were my fault. I had no idea I had been blamed and didn’t know what to say.

My colleague got the promotion.

On my bosses last day she asked me what I was going to do now, I replied I would see how it goes working under my colleague and wait to be promoted to another area.

My boss said are you sure, she then pulled me aside and said you need to leave. Your colleague has been backstabbing you since she knew one of you was going to be promoted.
Boss then showed me an email the colleague had sent to my bosses boss over her concerns about my work.

My boss had only just found out what had happened when colleague was offered the job.

My boss is no longer working at the company, and my colleague is now my boss. I can’t do anything about it, as it will just sound like I am having a tantrum over not getting the job.

I was considering handing my notice on Friday and telling them an edited version of why.

Or stick around a little longer and basically behave like my colleague did.

I already made her look like an idiot on her first day. So I might just go and be happy with that.

Op, honestly it’s not surprising you didn’t get the promotion. Can you not see the glaring omission in this?

there were some signficant errors. You were fully given the opportunity to explain those errors and what the root cause was. You were totally unable to do so. If you had been able, no one would have thought it was you.

in addition, your boss at the time, should have understood where those errors occurred and why. That was her job. What you are saying she said is she’s no idea and they all took some email as proof. Including her, who would have had input into the decision making process. She would have agreed the decision to promote your colleague.

she’s also taken the responsibility to ask you to leave and done it in a way it makes the company not look responsible..

if you think for one moment you now failing at your job makes your new manager look bad in her first day, then you are again grossly mistaken.

All you have done is confirmed to them they made the right decision and you are incompetent. You cannot seriously think your new manager is sitting singing “it’s me, I’m the problem”. She is not. She again will be explaining the failures in your performance.

you didn’t get the job for a multitude of reasons, including unable to explain the errors, your old boss deciding your colleague was best placed to replace her, poor performance at interview and it appears performance related issues.

all you are doing now is making your way to dismissal and making yourself look worse.

Original poster
Ihavetoleavemyjob · 06/09/2023 09:07

My boss didn’t know what was happening until she questioned why my colleague was promoted. If you saw the email you would understand why my boss told me to look for something else.
Yes I now report to colleague.

I am looking for another job. But in the meantime I have stirred trouble twice now. I too know how to use the bcc on email.

OP posts:
WomanStanleyWoman2 · 06/09/2023 09:24

Ihavetoleavemyjob · 06/09/2023 09:07

My boss didn’t know what was happening until she questioned why my colleague was promoted. If you saw the email you would understand why my boss told me to look for something else.
Yes I now report to colleague.

I am looking for another job. But in the meantime I have stirred trouble twice now. I too know how to use the bcc on email.

This makes it sound like you’re just enjoying the drama now. If you haven’t got another job lined up, you could be setting yourself up for months of misery as your boss tries to manage you out.

Concentrate on getting another job. Once you’ve quit, do bugger all in your notice period and let her pick up the slack. Don’t worry about references; as a previous poster said, the days of super-detailed references are long gone.

Janieforever · 06/09/2023 09:35

Ihavetoleavemyjob · 06/09/2023 09:07

My boss didn’t know what was happening until she questioned why my colleague was promoted. If you saw the email you would understand why my boss told me to look for something else.
Yes I now report to colleague.

I am looking for another job. But in the meantime I have stirred trouble twice now. I too know how to use the bcc on email.

I also suspect they will manage you out and are already doing so, all you’re doing is giving them ammunition, and sadly you can’t even see it.

and I don’t believe for one moment your boss did not feed into the decision making process on both your respective performance and know where it was going..

the fact also remains you were given full opportunity to explain the root cause of the errors and failed to do so.

i really would urge you to hasten your job search if you need the money or a reference from them.

Janieforever · 06/09/2023 09:36

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 06/09/2023 09:24

This makes it sound like you’re just enjoying the drama now. If you haven’t got another job lined up, you could be setting yourself up for months of misery as your boss tries to manage you out.

Concentrate on getting another job. Once you’ve quit, do bugger all in your notice period and let her pick up the slack. Don’t worry about references; as a previous poster said, the days of super-detailed references are long gone.

Show quote history

thats not right at all. The days of super detailed invoices are company dependendent and it doesn’t need to be super detailed to say you’d not employ someone again and they were a poor performer and why.

of course she needs to worry about references.

WomanStanleyWoman2 · 06/09/2023 09:48

Let me guess - you’re also one of these people who thinks hiring managers can just “pick up the phone” and immediately get through to the former manager…