Argh too nervous at interviews

[Aria20]

I've just finished a degree and got a 1st class. I haven't worked for 5 years due to retraining and caring responsibilities.
The jobs I had previously are totally different fields and I feel so out of my depth at the moment.

I read various job descriptions and adverts and know I am capable of doing the job if I was given a chance and shown the ropes.... But I am just too nervous in interviews, my mind goes blank, I stutter and I can't find the right answer. I end up feeling shaky and sick. So far I've only had remote interviews thank god as they are bad enough but how the hell am I going to get another job if I can't do an interview.

Does anyone have any tips on how to overcome this so I can hopefully have a successful interview and get a job?!

I always make sure to research the company, their values etc and the job description and as the interviews I've had so far have been remote I've had these to hand but even then they'll ask me something that throws me and I panic!

Help please!

Hi OP - interviews are very nerve wracking, so what you're feeling is very normal!

For remote interviews - you can use notes. Take some notes or write some scenarios that you can use for interview questions. That way if your mind goes blank, you'll have something to fall back on.

To combat nerves, I always try and think: They don't want me to be nervous. They want me to be good. Remember, these people are looking for a good candidate - they don't want to have to keep re-advertising! They really want you to perform well in the interview. So don't read too much into their faces other than - your success is their success.

And make sure you fully prepare for the interview. Read up everything you can about the company. Put yourself in a good position to do well - don't make yourself more nervous by going in blind.

I’m bad at interviews too.

I think a LOT of interviewers are nervous and I read that in their stoney faces. The interviews where I’ve excelled, even if I haven’t got the job - but I’ve come away feeling good about putting myself and my value across - are the ones where the interviewers had warm and readable faces, where they nodded and seemed appreciative of what I was saying.

I take those food experiences with me into every interview and am getting better at recognising that, where I’m unduly stressed once the interview starts, it’s because the interviewer is in stoney-faced robot mode (likely nervous) and I can more easily feel comfortable that my discomfort is coming in part from them. Helps me pull away from them and feel more robust in what I’m putting across.

that should say good not food 😂

I always think of all the reasons i might not want the job, whatever they are, and go in with the attitude that we are just checking each other out.

I always do really well in interviews.

@Notgnillew I have made sure I'm fully prepared about the company and values and the job etc and I do ok in those questions - I mean it's prob still obvious I'm nervous but my answers are appropriate and well thought etc.

It's more the questions like "what brings out the best in you?" Or other general questions about myself that throw me off guard. I guess I'm not used to thinking/talking about myself. I want to know the right answer to these type of questions so I can learn them.

I think it's a confidence issue - I have a real lack of confidence and I'm not sure how to overcome it in interviews.

Maybe I'm just not cut out for a professional career!

There are lots of websites with heaps of these questions on and tips for what employers are looking for. Google sample interview questions or what employers are looking for when they ask ...I find you need to write some sample answers out and practice saying them out loud. You don't need a script but having a few sentences to get you going will help. It's the pause after they ask the question that feels huge. You need to be able to start the answer and then the rest will come.

For a lot of jobs it can be possible to almost predict what kind of question they’re going to ask and prepare accordingly.

I work in HR and when I was interviewing for new roles recently I was asked in every interview about handling recruitment processes and managing my time in a busy environment. This meant I had a few scenarios that I could use as examples and had them pretty much down pat.

What kind of roles are you applying for?

you need some off pat answers to those questions
mainly you need to give examples,
show transfer of skills

@horseymum yes it's the pause!
@Willmafrockfit yes I need to learn some standard answers and get better at delivering them.

@FirstFallopians my degree was in psychology so very general and can be useful in many jobs. I am applying for a variety of different roles not in a specific field - basically anything that I feel I can do.
So far NHS, local authority and a couple of charities. I am looking at civil service too.

Ideally I'd like a flexible remote or hybrid job and of course everyone wants that so it makes it even harder when I don't have experience but I have good qualifications and would be able to do the jobs well.

Interviews can be really stressful! The way I always tackled it was to be prepared (or even over prepared!). Also whenever I interview anyone I prefer for them to show a bit of stress rather than for them to be completely relaxed - it shows they care.

I've always liked to approach interviews in a structured way and after doing a lot of research online (when I was preparing for my current role) I think it really helps if you are prepared for the following questions/prompts:

1. Tell me about yourself - to me a very important one. This question gives you a chance to go through your CV and 'add some colour' to it. Make it structured as if you're telling someone a short story about your professional life. As an interviewer I've always been surprised that people are sometimes caught off guard with this question!! It is not about your life story! Definitely make it relevant to the job advert. Think about: your key achievements to date, top skills, what are you the most proud of. Practice, practice, practice. Ask someone to listen to you when you're answering this question, make sure your answer is not too long. Also make sure you don't reveal everything (as it's usually one of the first questions during your interview), so you avoid repetition when more questions come.
2. Where do you see yourself in five years? - always have a plan, doesn't have to be a specific job role, it could be more around skills for example
3. Why would you like to work for our company? Again, you can have your answer structured 'why this industry?', 'why this company?', 'why this team?'. This will make do you research on the company.
4. Always real life have examples for:
5. Strengths and weaknesses
6. Describe a time when you’ve made an error and how you handled it aka Tell me about a time you messed up
7. Team work
8. Would you like to ask us any questions? Interviews like good and relevant questions. Think about what genuinely would interest you about the company/your role/ people you would be working with if you were to be starting your new job tomorrow.

I feel that if you're prepared for the above you'll cover the majority of standard interview questions.

Write your answers down in whatever format you prefer - bullet points/short sentences, whatever works for you. Go through them, make someone else listen, ask for feedback, time yourself. And slightly tailor your answers for the job you're applying it.

Also, be truthful and remember - sometimes less is more, better to give a shorter answer but be to the point :)

Good luck!!

Thanks @mrsdarthlord those are the kind of questions that scare me as I don't know the answer they are looking for. My husband is senior in his company and often does interviews- when I ask him though his expectations for his candidate's responses are so different to on here so I get confused about what the employer actually wants! For example when I ask him how to respond to "tell me about yourself" he actually wants the candidate to talk about them self personally - their life, their hobbies etc not their professional achievements etc as he says he can read their cv. So this is why I am so confused and stressed!! He is confident and can blag - I can not!

@mrsdarthlord what would be realistic answers for 5 years time for someone likely starting at an entry level role?
Also I wouldn't have a clue what to say about a time I made an error or messed up as I haven't worked for 5 years due to studying and even then I don't remember any particular mistakes I'd have made in my last job?! So what do I say to that? I can't say I've never made a mistake as that sounds big headed or a lie...so what should I say? What answers do you find are best?

@Aria20 , I think as long as it shows you're prepared for the question and your answer is relevant - it is absolutely fine!! An interviewer can always follow up with 'and how about your hobbies/what do you like to do in your free time?' if you talk about professional life and they want to know more about yourself. Or on the flip side if you talk about your hobbies then can follow up with 'could you tell me about your experience relevant to this role' if this is what they are after. They are human on the other side and they are having a conversation with you at the end of the day. Hopefully that makes sense!

@Aria20 ,

Also I wouldn't have a clue what to say about a time I made an error or messed up as I haven't worked for 5 years due to studying and even then I don't remember any particular mistakes I'd have made in my last job?!

Then think about an exam/test you didn't pass and how you had to re-take it. Did you have to change your studying strategy for example? Basically, think about any experience from your professional life where you have encountered some sort of a failure, but you've remedied it by reflecting on it/changing approach. Show that you don't give up in life!

So what do I say to that? I can't say I've never made a mistake as that sounds big headed or a lie...so what should I say? What answers do you find are best?

You do not want to talk about a massive, irreversible mistake that you have made at work that showed your complete lack of competence (or that make you fired, don't go to the extremes!). I think a good example is when shows that you are honest (admits they've made a mistake), truthful (for example they had to admit it to their manager/supervisor) and they can reflect and implement change. Or you can think about what you have not done but you feel that you should have?

Thank you @mrsdarthlord that's really helpful!

@Aria20 ,

what would be realistic answers for 5 years time for someone likely starting at an entry level role?

If it's an entry role - even better, there is so much to learn! Think about what kind of skills you would like to have in 5 years, it does not have to be a specific role. Show that you want growth! Read the job advert, think about what you can learn in your role.

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Also, from your previous post, you said one very important thing - 'my degree was in psychology so very general and can be useful in many jobs.' This is excellent! That could be one of your 'highlights'. Just make sure you have examples of how it could be relevant to the role you're applying for.

If you'd like to PM me if you have any specific jobs you want to apply to, I'm happy to help :)

I am like you and the thing that helps most is preparation. You need to think of every possible question they might ask and have an answer prepared. I find doing mind maps helps me to remember the information (rather than memorising a sheet of A4 with answers). Keep practising - ask yourself the questions and then answer them, over and over again until you know them off by heart. This has made a HUGE difference to me. My mind used to go blank all the times in interviews and I'd start panicking - but if I've memorised an answer I can just recite it (even if I'm nervous and shakey)! I've now successfully been offered lots of jobs.
The other thing that helps me is Kalms and Rescue Remedy.

I have no confidence either but can still think of positive things to say about myself "I like helping others, I have an eye for detail, I get great satisfaction from doing a job well". If certain types of questions are throwing you then prepare answers for these questions. You'll feel much more confident in your answers if you believe in them.

Thank you @SallyWD that's really helpful

You might want to consider talking to your GP and get a prescription for beta blockers OP. The kind of nerves where your mind goes blank and your hands shake etc is because of the effect of Adrenalin on your body. Beta blockers stop this spiking so your mind and body are free to answer questions sensibly.

Your GP will prescribe these for public speaking etc.

If you want a successful career you will at least occasionally have to present things and having beta blockers handy for those too will help immensely and mean you don’t cut your career trajectory short by avoiding public speaking at work.

People who say you can just prepare have probably never experienced their body betraying them with nerves before and just don’t understand it.

Once you have a few interviews under your belt you may find the confidence to do them without beta blockers as you’ve then got some good memories of interviews going well.

@mosiacmaker that's a good idea, will they definitely prescribe them for this sort of situation? How does it work, do you just pop one before you go to the interview or do they need to build up in your system?

I used to be much better at public speaking and public facing etc as I was confident in my job but I think being out of the work environment for 5 years and also trying to change careers has made me much more nervous. I think if I got a job and was settled I'd be ok down the line!