Am I too up myself?

[sianiflewog]

Why do people prefer disempowered people?

For example, a colleague I work for is struggling for various reasons. She kills herself at work and is regularly slow because she doesn't look after herself. We have to pick up the pieces. She won't go off sick and would prefer to hobble along. She works during her time off and is always grumpy and tired.

I would only blow my trumpet on here but when I was struggling, I went off sick so I could recover faster. I hope I'm positive and good to have around in the office. Am I too up myself?

I feel like your post doesn't match your question.

Someone who is up themselves to me would be arrogant and constantly blowing their own trumpet or refusing to do jobs they felt were beneath them.

There are lots of reasons why people might work the way this other person does, maybe she has a shit home life, maybe she's anxious about losing her job, maybe whatever sickness she has is scary for her so she'd rather keep going than admit how bad it is and take time off.

You dealing with illness differently doesn't make you 'up yourself' though.

Different people value different things. Some would admire her for pushing through the pain, some would admire you for recognising when you need a break. Im currently like your colleague, struggle to accept help, because of my upbringing. She was probably taught from a young age that you push on and never let anyone down for any reason.

Fancy thinking you're superior because you went off sick, how dull.

Perhaps she can't afford to go off sick? Do you get fully paid sick leave? Perhaps there are other things going on in her life and she really needs to keep her job because without it she will not be able to afford to live.

Agree with this

You don’t sound very positive and good to have around to be honest. More nosy and judgmental.

This post makes you sound up yourself, but the situation with your colleague doesn't in the slightest

She kills herself at work yet you criticise her. Maybe if you had more empathy you'd actually be helping her not to do this?

While your post doesn't sound super pleasant and I agree a little mismatched between the title and the content, perhaps the issue is women are often socialised to put others first, soldier on and not let others down to their own detriment like your colleague is doing.

As you're exposed to this socialization, maybe that is what is what is making you feel like prioritising your own wellbeing could be perceived as you being "up yourself" i.e. arrogant or self important.

Please know that it is not wrong to treat yourself as a valuable human being separate to what you can offer other people, and you absolutely should prioritise your health and wellbeing. But I would have more empathy for your colleague as there will be a reason she is unable afford herself the same courtesy.

People need to help themselves first. I have a similar colleague who won’t do anything to improve her situation. I’m past caring now.

Agree that your post doesn't match your question. Very confusing all round tbh

Who prefers disempowered people?

Are you referring to your colleague?

What does being up yourself mean?

Your colleague could be struggling for many reasons. Maybe try and find out how you could support her, if she is struggling?