How to keep my job, ideas?

[Jaberwokky]

I’m really hoping you lovely lot have some amazing suggestion we’ve not thought of. Really tired and wrote this around 4am so hope it makes sense. To be brief, we have DS(5, brain injury 18 ish months ago, functions at around an 18-24 month old), DN (15 months) and DS (8 months). I’ve had a year off on maternity leave, and had to take some unpaid parental leave to support older DS. I am due back at work the second week of September. Long story short despite his EHCP, numerous complaints and trying to get them to name a school on his plan so we can actually take it to a tribunal; the sad conclusion is no school consulted feel they can meet DS’s needs. We have no school place for September. This has been going on for well over a year.

DH and I both need to work. Financially, and to be honest for my own mental health. Both the youngest two have nursery places for my three working days, it’s just what to do with DS. He can’t be at home unsupervised while we work. DH is WFH one day, and me the other two days.

We have about £1100 a month to arrange something. No family nearby. Need to cover three days between 8:30-4:30. Neither of us can alter our hours any further. DH’s job includes a house, and I’m locked into my role due to OMP terms and them part funding a degree so both can’t really just get alternative roles. Ideas so far:

1. I apply for two months of parental leave and hope they say yes and try to defer the youngest two’s start date at nursery. May risk losing their places, and could just be kicking the can down the road and things may still not be resolved by the end of this. DH has no further unpaid parental leave he can take.
2. Hire a carer to be with him at the house? I assume it would be a carer rather than a nanny. Youngest two would need to attend nursery still as he’d really need someone 1-1.
3. Try to force the councils hand to provide a tutor (I think it’s 12 hours a week they need to provide) and try to arrange this for two days, then alternate taking a day as annual leave every other week with DH. Long term means we’ll struggle to cover school holidays when he eventually goes somewhere.
4. The least comfortable option, take out a loan to repay my employer, and we try to live off of DS’s DLA, CB and carers allowance. Have all three at home full time. I’m already not coping with this and really don’t think I can handle this in addition to financial strain and no respite. Could continue to try to home educate DS, which has proved impossible with the youngest two to care for as well. We’re not entitled to any other benefits.

Are we missing any other ideas? I’m trying to stay positive but it’s getting bloody hard at this point. Admittedly we have a bit of time left for the LA to sort something but I’m not hopeful.

I would take option two, hire a carer. Whilst simultaneously trying to get the council to step up-but that will most likely not happen before September and you need something reliable in place before the so you can go back to work with some peace of mind.
Carer in your own house is the easiest option for you.

Whereabouts are you op? I'm in SE so for that sort of care round here you would be looking at paying private carers £20 an hour or around that. Is that doable?

Am so sorry @Jaberwokky I really don't have much advice but as its really about education for DS would thread get good advice on education or additional support needs thread? Am sure there's posters there who know all the legal stuff re his rights to be provided with an education?

I’m staggered that the LA haven’t found a school that can accommodate your son’s needs. Can’t you push harder on this front? Are there any special schools, even outside of your LA, that would be able to accommodate his needs? Some more knowledgeable posters might be able to signpost organisations that can help you. Good luck x

I think you should be getting more support from the council. Your ds has a right to education, and if no schools can cater for his needs, I would expect the council to be telling you what alternative provision they are going to make. Can you approach your MP to get them to apply some pressure? This worked wonders when my friend's dc was unable to attend school for an extended period.

You have a lot on your plate. You need more help and support from the state than you're currently getting. It is not unreasonable in your situation to expect this.

@Jaberwokky What support do you have re his brain injury? Have you Headway in your area? They've been a good support for patients I work with in the past https://www.headway.org.uk/about-brain-injury/further-information/useful-organisations/children-and-young-people/

It's adults I work with but here's the children's link.

I’m so sorry it’s sounds really hard and it’s a real problem area - people with children with additional needs being able to maintain their work.
I think your energy needs to be directed to the LEA/social services. Formal complaint, MP, local councillor. Go all the way. They have to provide something. If he needs care then social services will have to be involved. They could potentially give you money to employ a carer yourself. Or in rare circumstances a family member can be paid via the direct payment. Don’t give up your job at this stage if you can help it, fight them for his education. There will be somewhere - an independent school perhaps, they will just not want to pay.

I think, but I'm no lawyer that you are covered by the Equality Act because you are a carer.

https://www.sutton.gov.uk/w/being-a-carer-equality-act-2010-provisions-for-carers#:~:text=If%20you're%20looking%20after,of%20their%20age%20or%20disability.

I think you need an open discussion with your employer about your options, you might be able to get help with care as part of a 'salary sacrifice'

https://www.gov.uk/guidance/salary-sacrifice-and-the-effects-on-paye

Where are you in the EHCP process?

You don’t necessarily need a school named in an EHCP in order to appeal to SENDIST. You ‘just’ need a finalised EHCP. This can be issued with section I left blank or only naming a type of placement. Do you have a finalised EHCP? If yes, and you are still within the appeal timescale, you can appeal.

If you have a finalised EHCP not naming a placement it is EOTAS. The LA remain responsible for ensuring everything detailed, specified and quantified in F is provided.You can not be compelled to deliver, facilitate or organise the provision. Under s.19 of the Education Act 1996 they must also provide a suitable, full time education (this is more than 12 hours a week). Email the Director of Children’s Services asking how they intend to fulfil their duties, and pointing out if they don’t you will be forced to pursue judicial review proceedings.

If you don’t have a finalised EHCP, it must be finalised within 20 weeks (for a new EHCP) or a maximum of 12 weeks from the review (if following annual or early review). If the LA have breached this email the Director of Children’s Services threatening judicial review. Sometimes the threat works, if it doesn’t for you, you need a pre-action letter, which works in the vast majority of cases.

If you start a thread about DS’s EHCP on the SN or SEN boards you will get further support about that specific point.

I would hire a career as well as following some of the avenues suggested here by people more in the know than I am.
What I do know is that a complaint to the MP makes the LA pee its pants and often gets good results.

I’d try to get a carer in place as soon as possible, to ease my own fears around being able to return to work.

Then at the same time I’d push the LA for a tutor whilst pursuing the school situation.

It’s a lot - my heart goes out to you.

I have no advice on the job front, unfortunately it's not unusual for parents of children with SEN to struggle to work. All I can think is could one of you work part time? Or both. I know a couple who both work part time different days so one can be at home to care for their child. If you haven't asked there yet there are some very knowledgeable people on the primary education forum who know a lot about the process of getting a placement and might be able to advise you how to get the LEA to act. I wish you all the best with it, I hope you can get a suitable placement for him soon and can stay working.

Just wanted to pop on and say thank you for all the responses - I’ll respond to everyone properly once the DC are in bed later. To clarify, the MP, director of children’s services and everyone other than SENDIASS have completely ignored all formal complaints. No one wants to be involved it seems. It’s currently sat with the social care ombudsman (in relation to DN as well as DS) who should respond mid next week as to whether they plan to uphold the complaints. Hoping that’ll drive it forward too.

A positive - an out of county independent we looked at last year have asked if DS can come in for an assessment next week so I guess all hope is not lost.

And as I’m sure someone will chime in, I’m aware I’m potentially the least desirable employee ever with a disabled DC and a looked after child in my care who will likely have significant difficulties of his own growing up. I know one day soon we‘ll need to decide which one of us is giving up work to be a carer full time. But I’m not ready for that yet and I’d like to be able to keep going for as long as I can.

Be careful with SENDIASS. Some are good, but too many repeat the LA’s unlawful policies. In your case, I would be wary because if the LA are in breach of the statutory timescales SENDIASS should have informed you about judicial review and if they aren’t in breach but have finalised without a school named they should have told you you can appeal and it is EOTAS.

Email the Director of Children’s Services threatening judicial review. Sometimes when they ignore other communication threatening JR gets their attention. If that fails look at a pre-action letter - normally I would suggest SOSSEN but their waiting list is closed at the moment so you will need to look at someone else there are lots of firms, if you get to that point post on the SN boards and you’ll get recommendations.

Is the independent wholly independent or section 41 independent? If it is a section 41 independent, naming it in the EHCP follows the same rules as state schools. You don’t need an offer of s places and the LA must name it if it’s your preference unless the LA can prove:
-The setting is unsuitable for the age, ability, aptitude or special educational needs (“SEN”) of the child or young person; or
-The attendance of the child or young person would be incompatible with the provision of efficient education for others; or
-The attendance of the child or young person would be incompatible with the efficient use of resources.
Unfortunately, the LA may still force you to appeal.