Stressed is a understatement looking for work

[Bella13476]

Hi
I left a part time job I loved, been there years, had friends but unfortunately with cost of living i needed full time wage, no choice to pay the bills, managed to get a full time job but unfortunately as soon as I joined four months later they let me go due to closed down..devastated..
As applied for 54 jobs and one came back and got it ..but it's temporary for three months they said if I do well they keep me on for another three months and it's a rolling contract for supermarket..they said it's a rolling contract for a year...everyone saying it's not reliable as can get rid of you within those three months ...I need permanent..but it's work at moment!
So looking elsewhere, got offered for a housekeeper in a care home , it's not local so some travelling...never worked in care home or done housekeeping before ..any ideas what it is like.? It's for a well know family organization....it's my confidence can I talk to.people or residence's?!

My partner said he may be able get me in to his place of work...it's very local same money as care home..warehouse work so.physical...do I work with him?

Since leaving a job I loved and confident in now I am losted, strange to say..at my age late 40s..totally losted within the work Industry. Realized I process limited skills. Don't know what to accept...my anxiety is kicking in, in tears over it all...do I stay at this temporary job in hope they keep me on? Do I go housekeeping job...or see if there's work at my partners place..

I don’t think working at the same place as your partner is ideal, especially if it’s physically hard as well.
The housekeeping role is probably mostly cleaning but be aware that with staff shortages in care homes you could get roped into other things, are you ok with that? Do you want a caring role?

It's a difficult situation to be in and I feel for you. Here are my thoughts .... There is shortage of workers nationwide. I would say stick to your supermarket job, turn up on time, do what's asked of you, don't engage in pointless gossip and they will keep you. However, I don't have a crystall ball, so no one knows for sure how the future would unfold. Another way to tackle the problem is to lie down 2-3 times a day for 20 minutes, do gentle breathing exercises, really focus on your breathing, try to let go of any thoughts, positive or negatives. After you get up, you might suddenly come up with an idea/solution you haven't thought before. Sounds wacky but works for me. It's difficult to make a good decision when our emotions are all over the place.

...everyone saying it's not reliable as can get rid of you within those three months ...

Actually, any employer can get rid of you for almost any reason in the first two years of employment, so your test of "reliability" doesn't work. Do you like the work, and is it convenient for you? Because if it is, I wouldn't listen to other people. By all means look at other opportunities and go for them if you think they will suit. But don't get conned into thinking that a job is "permanent" and end up in something that isn't right for you based on a myth. Your rolling contract has no less "pemanancy" than any other role - if anything you could argue that they are just being more honest and saying they aren't commiting to you until they are sure you are the employee they want to keep. I'm not saying that's a good thing, just that that is the position of any and all employers - they just aren't telling you that, but believe me, they know it!

Further to my earlier message.... I have a few years of experience in retail, mostly as an assistant manager ( I also worked as a housekeeper in hospital). Reliable, punctual, amicable people are highly valued in retail. So many yongsters turn up for work these days thinking the world owes them a living. With this mind, I would say, your age is actually to your advantage. I started on the shop floor hoping to make Christmas money. I ended up being an assistant manager very quickly. I moved to a different country and again started on the shop floor as a clearner, became a housekeeper after a year. If you have a solid work ethic and a positive attitute, you have nothing to fear. The fact you were offered a housekeeper job without experience is telling me you will be alright in any job you take. As for friends - I am sure you will make new ones.

I just don't know where to turn or what to do for the best..my partner has wants me out of retail as he thinks they mess u about,( that's all I know is retail) he on about me working at his place but moans about his job constantly then this housekeeping job in care home, I gathered it may be a bit of everything job..I never thought about a job in care as I am quite shy and not confident...I got another interview Thursday at a supermarket , doing what I used to do but it's a good half hour drive for 30 hours!?my partner moaning at me to sort a job out as yes worried about bills piling up...is local best?

My gut feeling is to keep your current job in retail and avoid working with your husband. Also, attend the interview next Thursday. Also, do the breathing exercises suggested earlier and see what other ideas/solutions come up once your mind and body relax. Both you and your husband are very stressed. It's not a good place to be when making rational decisions. If breathing exercises don't work for you, you can try downloading some relaxation hypnotherapy scripts off the internet - they only cost a few pounds. If you are wondering what hypnotherapy is all about - here is NHS linkhttps://www.nhs.uk/conditions/hypnotherapy/. I never take any important decisions without trying to get myself in a relaxed state first. Fear is a very bad advisor, in my books. Incidentally, there is a saying "sleep on it". You have a job that pays your bills at present. It's time to relax and evaluate your options calmly. I hope it helps

I think you have less of an employment problem and more of a partner problem - one very, very good reason not to work at the same place as he does. You are doing your best and managing in a difficult situation, and their job should be to support you, not to tear you down and make you feel worse. If you have experience in retail, like it, and there is work available, then do that. It isn't up to him to decide what is best for you.