Practical advice on leaving a job with nothing else lined up

[TBC45678]

Mums with young kids - if you had a gap in your CV (I.e. from having a baby until they were school age) what have the implications been for your working life? What happens to your pension for example? Did you find it hard to get back into work? I have a job which it's relatively easy to find work in, but I'm worried about losing my confidence etc.

Just really struggling with juggling mum life with two pre-schoolers (in v expensive nursery) with a middling career which I quite like but am increasingly resenting. Only work 3/4 days a week and my wage barely covers childcare costs so it's a bit like work is a hobby for me... Got another 18 months before the eldest starts school so quite a long time to sit it out.

But then I hear horror stories about the negative impact on your career and prospects and future earnings and pensions. I'm in a quandary. Advice/experience much appreciated!

How would you support yourself? Is your partner cool with it?

Yes, like I said our monthly childcare costs all but cancel out my wage so we wouldn't really be any noticeable amount worse off. But of course the idea of not bringing in my own salary does make me feel a bit odd...

I believe if you are the parent receiving the child benefit then your state pension is fully covered as though you are working.
So even if you would have to repay some or all of it because of the other parents earnings it's worth claiming for the stay at home parent.

I did this and my lifetime earnings will be massively lower as a result. Worth it for me but you really do need to think about all the different factors- possibly needing to drop seniority to come back, years missed when you could have been advancing etc.

Do you have a partner? Remember that half the childcare is their responsibility. I know that in practice it's one parent who usually stops work so practically it's tempting to think about that parent's salary v the childcare costs, but this is how women end up financially vulnerable.

our monthly childcare costs all but cancel out my wage

That's not how joint costs work and thinking about it like that leads to dysfunctional decision making.

Your career is not a hobby.

@DeltaFlyer thanks that's very useful info which I didn't know!

I totally understand what other posters are saying about it being more than a consideration of the financials at this moment. But when work is feeling tough, and I'm missing my very young kids whilst I'm there, it feels a bit pointless. Especially as, whilst I enjoy my job, I'm not particularly ambitious and don't really want to climb the ladder higher than I am.

I'm so aware that in a few years the kids will be in school 5 days a week, and then a few years after that they won't want to hang out with me all the time, in the same way they do now. I don't want to look back on this time of them being very young and think I missed out so that I could keep a not-that-great-career.

I would really like to hear experiences from mums who did pause their career whilst the kids were little, and how they found it getting back into it.

It's a perfectly valid choice to be a sahm when you have preschool age kids. But I wouldn't do it based on 'your' childcare costs cancelling put 'your' salary as a pp pointed out. It's a joint expense.

Fwiw I sah after having dc1 u till dc2 started preschool and found it alright getting back into work. Tbh the 2008 crash which was when I graduated uni was worse than the gap on my cv.