How would you respond to this team member?

[CandlesandStars]

Hello, would really like to hear how others might deal with this behaviour from a team member, TIA.

I manage this person and we've had a number of conversations about their behaviour. They've been told to change their behaviour or disciplinary procedures will be next.

Now, I feel that they're trying to muddy the waters by involving the whole team in any decision they have to make. We're a team of 6 and they now call a meeting with everyone to discuss their work and get everyone to make a decision with them. Whilst I agree with involving the team, particularly as we're a small team, it's becoming more and more clear to me that what they're doing is trying to remove any risk from themselves and wasting a lot of time.

I've had the discussion with them where I've said that everyone has their own role and we cannot take up too much of other colleagues time when it's unnecessary. It's had some effect but not as much as I hoped.

Have you ever been in a similar situation? How did you deal with it? I don't want to come across as someone who prevents the team meeting and discussing things but I also don't want one person trying to protect themselves whilst bothering others.

What was their bad behaviour beforehand?

Hi, attitude, rudeness and not meeting deadlines.

sounds like they need a performance management plan?

Don't "suggest" that it wastes people's time - tell them.

But you can also do what our boss has done: in a recent Town Hall Meeting he said that if you are invited to a meeting and you get there / log in to find it doesn't concern you and/or you have more important things to do - just say "I don't need to be here, bye" and leave.

This person is wasting everyone's time. What did they do that was inappropriate? make a wrong decision? are your processes robust?

Hi @Brefugee & @OhComeOnFFS, they were rude to me and others on many occasions.
I do think they need a performance management plan but I am also dealing with their anxiety. Recently, they've started most days by telling me they're dealing with a personal issue and I'm beginning to see that this is how they've dealt with issues they've had in the past. They've done well academically but I feel they're now struggling with work and being given deadlines etc.

I feel like I'm constantly dealing with something related to them and it just needs to stop now.

Are they booking meetings or is it being done through chat/emails?

I think you need to be direct. Where meetings are set up, ask them to cancel the meeting, and emphasise that this is their decision to make and their responsibility to deliver. Encourage the whole team to decline meetings which are not relevant or essential. (My project manager tells us this repeatedly)

If its chit chat in the office, I would take them aside and be clear that the colleagues need to be left to do their own work and that the employee in question has to manage their own decision making and responsibilities. Document every discussion with a brief email to them. If they keep doing it after the conversation and follow up email, then move to more formal managent procedures.

So you need to make a performance management plan with them.

Maybe they could reduce their hours (and salary) while they get over their issues in their private life? From what you wrote the adjustment from uni to the world of work hasn't been their forte?

How about a mentor who could guide them in the correct way to talk to people, formulate emails, do the whole World Of Work thing that most of us pick up along the way? maybe with a daily buddy meeting (15 minutes tops) to discuss:
5 minutes how they are
5 minutes what they did yesterday
5 minutes what they will do today

set realistic goals/targets/KPIs and agree to review after 3 months?

If you don't think they're worth the effort, give them one more evaluation, a talking to and then let them go if they don't improve.

I would agree - this is a performance issue, and that is how I would treat it. If they are unable to make decisions about their own work without everyone else being involved, I would say that they are incapable of doing their job.

Given there have been previous performance issues around deadlines, I would put a performance improvement plan in place that:

• Explains the standard to which they are expected to work with measurables - to include attitudes and behaviours with other people
• Clarify the expectations around personal capability - what is appropriate for discussion with their line manager (i.e. you) if they cannot do something or make a decision
• Make it clear that (a) it is your role to call team meetings and not theirs, and (b) that other staff have their own work to do and do not have the time to help them with work that should be within their capability
• If they fail to perform to expected standards there will be consequences in line with your employers policies.

Who manages the team - is that you? I suggest that you tell everyone that to improve team time management, all requested meetings are to be arranged through you, and you will decide who needs to attend.

Recently, they've started most days by telling me they're dealing with a personal issue and I'm beginning to see that this is how they've dealt with issues they've had in the past.

"I am sorry that you are having such a hard time with your personal issues. Perhaps it would be best if you took some time off to manage them. How much unpaid time off would you like?"

I wondered for a minute if this was me writing for a minute as I have one just the same. It's anxiety and lack of confidence, and I think ADHD for my colleague. It's being managed gently at the moment but with clear and firm expectations of achieving certain things.

It's interesting the point you make about involving everyone so they're absolved of responsibility.

I wonder if you played that back to them as part of a wider conversation if they would see that and understand the impact that has eg lack of professional respect, not being seen to be capable etc? eg So you've delivered x&y, how did you achieve that?
Because I observed a&b and wondered if you realised that other people could perceive that as a) you not wanting to take responsibility b) you lacking in confidence. I think we should consider how colleagues might see you and engage with you as a result of that - for example, would you have as much professional respect for someone who did that to you? Would you perceive them to be fully able to do their job?

The other line is around what were you hoping the meeting would achieve given that we already discussed that this is your decision?

It's exhausting having to track and call it out all the time, so, solidarity.

Well... you told them to change their behaviour, and it sounds like they did?!

The calling meetings thing happens in one of my teams, except they all don't want to make a decision on their own, so that makes life interesting! Is your person driving the rest of the team potty by any chance?

I can't see how constantly having a meeting with everyone changes their attitude, makes them less rude or helps them meet deadlines? So therefore it's actually something to add to the list of unwanted behaviours.

It's definitely a performance issue. I think you will need to accept that this person will be the one that takes up 90% of your time (hopefully you only have the one of these though!)

Quveas gave some great advice upthread.

Poor performance- they’re nothing stopping you from dealing with poor perf whilst also supporting them with their anxiety. The plan isn’t to punish them but to record what they are doing, expectations, support that will be provided etc.
refer them to occ health for advice on how best to support their anxiety at work. No excuse for being rude though!!