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Work wanting me to bring maternity leave forward by a week

42 replies

Hnotaitch · 26/05/2023 17:03

Trying to think how to word this.

So I am down to start Mat leave on the 3rd july. I work 3 days a week, and in the final week of my leave there are two antenatal appointments and also a school trip I am not involved in, which means I won’t actually be doing much. It has been ‘suggested’ to me I bring my mat leave forward … I’m correct this is my decision unless it is sickness related?

OP posts:
Gnoblin · 26/05/2023 17:08

Your understanding of things is correct as far as my understanding goes. Antenatal appointments come under reasonable paid time off. If you had been off work sick as a result of your pregnancy in the last four weeks of your pregnancy they could request you begin mat but this is not the case for you.

Pleasebeafleabite · 26/05/2023 17:08

From their perspective, you can’t blame them for asking

From your perspective, do what you like

Overthebow · 26/05/2023 17:10

They can suggest, you can decline.

Fuckitydoodah · 26/05/2023 17:12

They can't make you, but I can understand why they suggested it. I think I'd say 'sorry, but doing that would mean one less week I get to spend with my baby, so I'll stick to the original date'.

EverythingsCominUpMilhouse · 26/05/2023 17:13

It's completely your decision, they cannot push you to take mat leave earlier.

Your mat leave would start the day your baby arrives, if your baby was to arrive earlier. It would also start if you were off sick, as you said.

I'd be sticking to your original plan and taking mat leave from the date you decided. Tbh I think they're being incredibly cheeky here.

Fandabedodgy · 26/05/2023 17:15

You are correct. Your decision.

SleepingStandingUp · 26/05/2023 17:16

You're within your rights to say no, after all it means coming back earlier the other side.

I assume you work in a school re the trip your not involved in? I'm sure there's something else they can find for you to do if it's your pupils on the trip and you can't go. But ultimately unless you're refusing to go that's not your problem

Hnotaitch · 26/05/2023 17:18

No, not refusing to go, it is just that Y11 and Y13 have left, and Y7 are on a trip. This means that on the Monday I have no lessons at all, then one on the Tuesday and two on the Wednesday.

I do blame them for asking to be honest, I don’t think that they should be putting me in this position. There’s nothing I can do about it of course!

OP posts:
PurBal · 26/05/2023 17:20

Your decision. Also mat leave is as much about end date as the start date.

cantsleepp · 26/05/2023 17:22

I think it's really cheeky and unprofessional that they even asked, like you say, puts you in an awkward position. I definitely would be saying no

FirstnameSuesecondnamePerb · 26/05/2023 17:36

I don't think it's an awkward position.
"Thanks for suggesting this. My maternity leave has been carefully planned by me, so I will be sticking with the agreed dates".

Hnotaitch · 26/05/2023 17:36

Well yes exactly. It’s not something they should ask me to do. That’s what is awkward!

OP posts:
SemperIdem · 26/05/2023 17:40

There’s nothing wrong with them asking.

There’s nothing with you saying no.

WishIwasElsa · 26/05/2023 17:41

Can you just say that you have considered it but would prefer to stick to your original plan

Hnotaitch · 26/05/2023 17:43

Asking is a subtle form of pressure. I do think it is wrong of them to ask. Had I wanted to bring it forward, I would have.

OP posts:
SemperIdem · 26/05/2023 17:44

Legally there is nothing wrong with them asking. It is actually important for employers to communicate with employee re maternity and not just assume the original plan remains the plan.

Tell them no thank you and move on. This is a non-issue.

mummyh2016 · 26/05/2023 17:44

It's cheeky of them ask but surely you can understand why they have. You can say no though, why are you making an issue out of it Confused

Hnotaitch · 26/05/2023 17:48

I’m not making an issue, I’m double checking on here.

I can have my own personal view about it, which is that it is totally inappropriate and discriminatory, so yes I do understand why they asked and believe this to have been poorly judged and wrong.

OP posts:
QueenOfWeeds · 26/05/2023 17:56

I also work in a school and I can completely sympathise with this. I was asked to delay a scan by a week so that it fell within the school holiday, except it was time sensitive and had to be done before then. It was linked to a potential problem with the baby and the head (it’s a small school) knew I was frightened. I stopped feeling guilty about time off at that point, and in all honesty it has made me doubt whether or not I want to go back.

It’s the kind of discussion SLT should have in private, not push onto you. Good luck with your mat leave - I was exhausted by the time mine started.

EverythingsCominUpMilhouse · 26/05/2023 18:03

Hnotaitch · 26/05/2023 17:43

Asking is a subtle form of pressure. I do think it is wrong of them to ask. Had I wanted to bring it forward, I would have.

@Hnotaitch exactly. You don't need to explain yourself to people on here - it's a playground for the emotionally stunted.

Hnotaitch · 26/05/2023 18:06

@QueenOfWeeds I’m so sorry you went through that. I am put out at the way it’s been phrased - it was very much the assumption I WOULD do this, rather than ‘would I like to’ (which is still wrong.)

@EverythingsCominUpMilhouse its unfair because it isn’t as if I’m going to be benefiting from an exceptional maternity package or anything and because of the timing I’ll actually lose quite a bit! Of course that isn’t the schools fault but I’m hardly being mercenary because of a Y7 trip and an appointment!

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 26/05/2023 18:22

So yes, not your problem. Had you not been pregnant, you'd have still had Monday with no lessons and a light week. They wouldn't have suggested you don't come into work for those days as it isn't worth it, so why on earth would you go on mat leave earlier?

Firm no, that doesn't work for me.

Weallgottachangesometime · 26/05/2023 18:25

I agree they were out of order to ask, as you’re right it is a form a pressuring you or trying to make you feel guilty for ending on an “easy” week. I’m sure you’ll use that time to sort handover etc so sounds like a good week to end on to me

BelieveThemtheFirstTime · 26/05/2023 18:29

They’re taking the p.
Just say ‘No thank you; that does not work for me’.

Enjoy your Mat Leave when you get there.

SheilaFentiman · 26/05/2023 18:30

Another one agreeing they are being unreasonable!