Taking a career break

[SnapDragon5]

I have been managing a project for a big organisation for the past 5 years which finishes in July

I've also been having fertility treatment for a couple of years and my mental health is now on the verge of collapse, in combination with a stressful and full on job. I've started having therapy and taking medication.

I've considered taking some time out after the project finishes to breathe and focus on my wellbeing, but it feels so indulgent. DH is in support of me doing it for a couple of months even if unpaid.

I'm just worried because a new project is being set up straight away and they want me to take that on and manage it. If I take a break they might want to recruit someone else... then I don't know where it leaves me.

I was thinking about a career change into a less stressful job anyway but that would be a pay cut and also feels a bit of a failure.

I'm just feeling so overwhelmed by it all. I haven't spoken to my manager yet - she just assumes I'll transition to the new project.

Any advice or similar experiences? Would employers look unfavourably on me if I have a few months gap on my CV because I took time out for myself? Anyone else having fertility treatment been through similar?

If I take a break they might want to recruit someone else... then I don't know where it leaves me.

that is a risk but presumably you are highly regarded and valued so trust that

The good thing about your kind of work is that career gaps don't matter, because it could just as easily be a gap between projects as an absence through choice.

Speak to the manager and see how she feels about you taking a break at the start of the project. Are there other people who could handle the project set up?

Thanks @Youheshetheysaid Yes I hope I am as I was also working for the company before I started this project, so been very loyal and get good results.

@GoodChat Yes probably other people could handle it, I just have so much guilt about going off as I have the most skill/ expertise in this area. I will speak to my manager though, thank you.

I am in a similair situation. One stressful / high profile / demanding project to the next on succession and the work environment and pressure is crippling me. I have considered many times going into a different field but understand the same feelings of failure as you.

I'm getting to the stage though that it is not worth it. When you are on your death bed and look back are you going to be pleased that you delivered another project that, by then, no one will care about... or will you value that you have stepped in and saved your mental health before it spirals further?

Very good way of putting it @slipperypenguin

The work I do is very worthwhile so does make a difference and I'm quite proud of it really. It's just so stressful to run the project, manage staff, and be having to go for multiple fertility appointments every month as well.

It's draining and I'm really feeling the impact in my body and my mind, but I'm always trying to push through. I know I need to do something though.

Hi, where I work and in previous companies taking a career break is seen as you have resigned. They say they will try to find you new role within the company after the break but is not promised and in most cases is seen as a coat saving.

Cost saving even

How is the fertility treatment going? Is it likely you will be on maternity leave soon? Sorry don't want to be insensitive as I appreciate it must be very a difficult thing to go through but just thinking if you take a break will it impact your eligibility for maternity leave and pay??

@Aria20 It is a valid concern, but without going into huge detail it's been ongoing since 2021 and I'm not pregnant yet.

If/ when I will be on maternity leave is a 'how long's a piece of string' question (and does the string even exist?) and I've tried to stop basing life decisions on it.

@SnapDragon5 well in that case absolutely put yourself and your mental and physical health first and take a break.

I’d take a break (I’m currently doing the same) but I wanted to ensure we were financially stable before doing so. We’ve been fortunate to save quite a bit over COVID years to give ourselves a bit of breathing room to a)ensure all the bills are paid and we have money to enjoy the break without a massive impact to our general lifestyle and b) if my husband (secure job, been there for a good few years) was to get sick/loose his job, we’d still be able to pay bills and have a bit of a life.

My manager knew I was in a really difficult spot mentally and was really great but I decided to resign in the end. I’m nearing 6 months off and the impact it’s had on my well-being is huge. That being said, we’re not trying to start a family, so I’m not concerned that I’d be loosing out on (what was at my previous job) a very good maternity package when I could potentially start at a new company that offered me the basics.

Not sure what industry or projects you do, but does your company offer sabbaticals?

I started my new job the day after an embryo transfer- which later give us DS. I missed out on SMP by four weeks and we survived my short may leave on maternity allowance £156 a week (DP was a student at the time). As a line manager I advise pregnant staff to run their numbers and ensure they get their entitlements. For example one is scaling up to fulltime just in time for a second leave.