Quitting work… thoughts

[JessTD]

I came back from my 2nd May leave in Jan. whole team and company had changed. I don’t belong there and hate every minute. I’m studying as well as working full time plus have two small kids. It’s all consuming. I want to quit, work my notice and find something else. I don’t have time to job hunt as it stands. Good idea or crazy? My DH works, he’s self employed. Large mortgage. High childcare costs.

If your family needs your salary, you need to find something else before you quit.

I feel your pain, though. Horrible working somewhere you’re unhappy. But also horrible not being able to pay your bills!

Crazy with no job to go to and high outgoings.

Carve out some time to job hunt (ie batch cook to free up a couple of evening's cooking, or try and get ahead with study to give yourself a few hours you can devote to looking elsewhere).

I feel your pain - I've been job hunting seriously since end of last year. I'm MISERABLE in my job. It's also completely changed after me being relatively happy there for 5 years. I agree with the PPs though that you need to prioritise this and plan accordingly, don't just resign with nothing else to go to. What's kept me going is knowing that there is something out there, I will get another job eventually and it will be such a sweet day when I hand in my resignation. Just keep your eyes on that prize and schedule time to do it properly. You'll be very relieved you did.

Depends how much your DH earns and how guaranteed his income is. A lot of companies are making redundancies at the moment so there are more candidates in the market, I'm not sure it's the best time to willingly leave a role with nothing to go to.

Thanks everyone. Sound advice. I’ll keep going for now but try and prioritise the job search. It’s so hard though. I get no down time as it is so face exhaustion and burn out but hopefully it’ll be worth it.

Hello

If its any consolation @JessTD I am also in a job I hate with 3 small DC. The job is soul destroying in a toxic environment. I've been there 4 months. Absolutely desperate to leave but have to hang in there because of our fairly low joint income and I don't want to put the pressure on DH (despite DH saying I need to quit). I will keep looking and will again make sure the next job is a better one. Unfortunately you just never know what you're walking into but good luck and keep your chin up.

I hear you. It’s a tough situation. I’m just so tired of trying to have it all.

Yes. Agree. It shouldn't be this difficult should it. Simple family life. Simple job in easygoing environment. Not a lot to ask is it. It'll get better I'm sure and I'm sure there's some learning in here somewhere. Keep going and do positive things like learning, short courses if you can so it looks good for the next job.

@JessTD you need to stick it out until you get a new job. Some ideas on how to create the time to look for a job:

• can you put studying in hold either now, or at the end of a module etc. ? Obviously if getting the qualification improves you options then that’s a no go.
• Look doing a compressed hours 9 day fortnight. You do about 50 minutes extra for 9 days, but it gives you a whole day each fortnight to focus on job hunting.
• Could you drop a day and do 4 days, again this gives you a whole day to focus on job hunting. If you can do longer days so 4 x 8 hour days = 32 hours. A gross to net salary calculator shows the impact on wages.

I'm in the same boat OP. I am hunting, but it's a difficult market. I find I just have to ride the wave of the grrrrrr feelings and know it will all work out in time. A year ago I would have quit with nothing to go to but things were different then and the recession is biting now. So don't quit, you'll only be swapping job stress for lack of money stress

Can you just plough on until end of term and then the long summer do cv/applications/interviews with the hours you wouldn’t been studying

As above, I think you need to remove some of the stress if you need the wage by pausing stud, reducing working days or both.

Its just not sustainable with a very young family & a job you hate, but you have options to explore before jacking it all in and facing financial issues, or ploughing on into burn out.

You can have it all, but it doesn't have to be right now. Returning after maternity leave is hard enough.

I found it hard when I returned to work after maternity leave and I felt everything had changed. There was even new jargon I had never heard of and it took months to pick it up.

Is it possible that if you hang on in there another six months that it could get better as you adjust? I found that happened to me and I ended up staying another five years.

Thanks everyone. The studying is online so go at my own pace. My job is very full on, in a high stress industry. I’m the higher earner. I don’t mind that but with everything else it’s very consuming and pressured. I will keep going and keep applying as would like to reduce my hours too. Good to know I’m not alone (although no way I’ll do another 5 years!!) x

Actually I think you need to accept that you can't continue like this as you have too much on your plate and are miserable at work.

What I would do is get a part-time job that you can combine with your studies and caring for small children.

Or you could make a request to move to a jobshare arrangement in your current role.

I am also going to say that I don't think it is fair for you to be expected to be the high earner, get all the stress that comes with a high pressure job and care for your kids while your partner freelances.

You might need to rebalance that so that you are not the one with all the stress/financial burden/ care responsibilities in the relationship.