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Any ideas how I can fall in love with being a manager again?

13 replies

LuckyThatMyBreastsAreSmallAndHumble · 09/03/2023 14:28

I have been doing this for years.
But sometimes I really just find people a massive pain in the arse.
It's such a thankless task!

OP posts:
PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 09/03/2023 18:45

Having been in the same boat, I think the best 'cure' is to move out of management for a while - perhaps take a sideways move.

Muddydogpawprints · 09/03/2023 18:54

Here for the tips.... terrible day of line management 😞

Iliketeaagain · 09/03/2023 19:03

Me too - I've moved sideways to a non-management role (or at least minimal line management).

I think people you line manage forget that you are a human being sometimes and take frustration out on you. And I realised that I could bend over backwards to be flexible, supportive, encourage development and it wouldn't be enough. There are some people I've line managed who I could have done their work for them, double their salary and they still wouldn't be happy with the offer.

On the other hand, most people are just trying to do their best, and don't like that a line manager has to do the best for a team, a service and individuals and the 3 don't always nicely combine.

LuckyThatMyBreastsAreSmallAndHumble · 09/03/2023 20:57

And some people just like to pick holes in EVERYTHING! And have no self awareness WHATSOEVER! They just like to very politely CRITICISE EVERYTHING. Gahhhh!

OP posts:
Rafting2022 · 09/03/2023 21:00

This is why I asked to be relieved of managing staff - never been happier.

Olaftree · 09/03/2023 21:02

I’ve also moved sideways in my org but it pays 4k more. I am much, much happier. I might go back in a few years, I’m a good manager and good with people, but I no longer have Sunday night dread and it’s like a weight has been lifted!
People can be arseholes

Olaftree · 09/03/2023 21:03

Also love being part of a team meeting I’m not running 🤣 any of the awkward silences I don’t feel responsible for. It’s great!

BeingAwake · 09/03/2023 21:06

I'm another one who took a different job to avoid managing people. I'm much happier at work!

NewChange · 09/03/2023 21:30

Just moved out of line management too and will resist any efforts to draw me back in. I don’t want the responsibility. It’s not worth the aggro!

whirlyswirly · 09/03/2023 21:46

I had this conversation with a coach I work with the other day. She said those who are happiest are usually in technical leadership roles, not people ones.
Mine is very much a people one. I am also fantasising about getting out. So is dp.

I swear people are getting less capable of working independently. I've had enough of it.

MsCunk · 09/03/2023 21:51

I've just interviewed today for a line manager position with 10 direct reports and am feeling the fear after reading this thread...! I've never managed such a big team, and currently have no management responsibility- feeling a bit overwhelmed at the thought!

Alwaysworryingoversomething · 09/03/2023 21:53

I moved out of management- temporary contract ended at the start of lockdown and there were no suitable jobs around.

I was lucky to get one in my area of work but was a 'step down' with no management responsibility.

I have come to really miss it (my three management roles were very positive experiences with excellent and nice teams).
The team I am now part of is a shitshow to put it bluntly. The manager is a lovely person but has absolutely no idea how to manage people.

I feel really frustrated all the time as I know I could do a good job as a manager there and feel quite enthusiastic about the work, but the lack of leadership, sniping and negativity is awful and sad.

Sorry OP I don't know the answer.
Having a break or moving to manage a different area? Would that help?

ThePoshUns · 09/03/2023 22:40

I've taken a demotion from managing a team of 20+ to a team of 7. I retire in 10 months and I can't wait. Managing people is draining and thankless. I only ever had one ( lovely) member of staff who would ask now and again' and how are you?'

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