Am I sad or just ill-suited to my new job?

[Nin93]

Over the past 18 months I've lost both my mum and dad after debilitating illnesses. Since they've passed I started a new job in a new sector and thought I was coping really well. But for the past couple of weeks I've had low mood and lack confidence in terms of my performance at work. I'm getting good feedback but feel like maybe the job isn't for me. Can't decide whether I need a new job or to cut myself some slack for being in a difficult life stage (menopausal). Has anyone experienced anything similar?

Sorry to hear about your parents, that is a lot to deal with in a real short space of time without starting a new job too!

You mention low mood, could this be grieving? I have found that grieving came out in ways I didn't expect. Are there things you can do to help with your mood whilst you build your confidence?

It sounds like you are doing well in your new job but that you aren't able to hear that or take that on at the moment, as its not matching how you feel. I've just started a new job last week and am reminding myself to be patient with myself as it is really hard going from knowing what I was doing to learning everything from scratch and definitely has impacted my confidence as I like to know everything! I am in a new organisation in a completely new role so can empathise with that.

Could you give yourself say another 3 months to work on how you are feeling and then make a decision? You could speak to the GP or seek some alternative help with your mood.

Best of luck with it - I hope you can give yourself some time and look after yourself 💜

What a lovely thoughtful message @Fofftwenty21 I think it is difficult going from a role where you have lots of competence and experience to a completely new sector. I'm used to being the one answering questions, not asking them!

I also think as you wisely suggest I should maybe give myself more time. A deadline for seeking help is also a really good call. I am aware that Mothers day is nearly here, I thought I wasn't bothered by it - maybe my low mood suggest otherwise.

Hope your new job goes really well, thanks for your insight and empathy.

Ah I'm glad you found it helpful, I've been really surprised by how difficult I've found it and so I think it will just take a bit of time for us both 😉

The first day like that without someone is really hard (my Dad 2 yrs ago) I found it helpful to have a loose plan for the day that I could cancel if I didn't feel up to it rather than worrying how I would feel/get through the day.

Best of luck xx