Boss asking me to try to make appointments relating to pregnancy out of work hours

[Workpregnant]

I think ‘try to’ might be the sticking point here.

I work three days a week, and am pregnant. My next appointment is on a day I work and boss agreed to it but clearly reluctantly and asked me to ‘try’ to make appointments for days I don’t work.

I have no control over this at all though, so I don’t think it’s reasonable to ask. Or am I being over sensitive?

Hi and thanks. I can’t just swap my working day, because I am a teacher with timetabled classes. Also, I am part time because I have a preschool child, so his nursery is booked for particular days. I can’t just randomly change that according to where I’m allocated an appointment.

I have had a couple of appointments on days I don’t work but obviously work don’t know about those.

I have a similar problem to a PP as the consultant I’m under only works two days a week in that hospital and both are days I’m in work.

Honestly I think it depends what the appointment is. Consultant appointments and scans you don't have any say however IME community midwives normally have at least 2 days a week for appointments so I would try and change these if possible.
I can see both sides, I used to work with someone who only worked one day a week and she used to take the piss with her appointments and be quite blatant about it, she would always schedule them (and make it clear she was choosing when to go) on the 1 day a week she worked and smack bang in the middle of the day so a 15 minute appointment would mean she was missing from the office for 3 hours.

But that’s hardly what I’m doing, @mummyh2016 , is it?

I don't know that do I, I don't know you.
Now you've said you're a teacher though it does make a lot more sense as to why you're being asked to arrange them for your days off. If school are having to pay for supply every time you have an appointment it must be playing havoc with their budget.
I can't remember if you've stated if you can change your appointments or not. If you can't then you can't but if you can I would try and change them IMO.

I'm part time and totally share your frustration. I have needed medical procedures and arranged them on days off. Whereas a full time colleague would probably get the time off sick (one is a minor op).

I have had a couple of appointments on days I don’t work but obviously work don’t know about those.

Well in that case, the obvious thing would be to make work aware of those. So when you ask for time off for an appointment, make it clear that although you have been able to schedule a couple of previous appointments for non-work days, this one isn't negotiable.

I don’t have a conversation with them - it’s all done via various forms and so on.

@mummyh2016 - I’ve said that I don’t. I’ve said that some appointments have been arranged for my days off (unlike your colleague) and that I work three days, not one (also unlike your colleague.) So

Fine for them to ask and you say no. Any pressure is illegal. If you feel that talk to union if you are in one or ACAS. Some home/car insurance has legal coverage for a range of issues.

They only asked you to try, so yes you are being over sensitive.

Some really bad advise on here.

my professional HR advice is that you are entitled to paid time off for your appointments, and making you switch your non working day to go to these appointments could be seen as maternity discrimination due to the fact you have a LEGAL RIGHT to paid time off.

You don’t have a legal right to paid time off for other non maternity related appointments which is why swapping your days isn’t an issue for these.

I’ll throw in here that actually you’ve got a legal right to paid time off for stuff like NCT classes, pregnancy exercise classes and similar too (if these are recommended by your midwife/GP), not just midwife appointments, scans etc. I had SPD in my last pregnancy so my midwife has recommended I do pregnancy yoga this time, and I’m entitled to paid time off work for this (my bosses being HR are aware of this right so no quibbles!).

I work a compressed working pattern and have no intention of messing around unnecessarily swapping days or appointments for my employer’s benefit. My appointments are where they are.

If you have any further issues look at the maternity stuff on the ACAS, and just drop your boss a friendly email if you are challenged again. @cavebaby suggestion is a good starting point but leave out the bit about sensing frustration, just stick to the facts - you have no control over your maternity related appointments.

x

Because offering to switch days just because she is PT isn't fair - a FT employee would have no expectation to make the time up. You cannot be penalised just because you work part time. She is legally entitled to those appointments and is not being unreasonable to a business to take them.

I don’t have a conversation with them - it’s all done via various forms and so on.

Well you need to. Have a conversation with the boss who 'reluctantly agreed'. "When you ask" in my post above refers to whatever method you use to request time off in your workplace. Send an email when you submit your request to explain to them that you are doing what you can to lessen the impact on them but this appointment is non-negotiable.

"Dear Boss, I've just put in a request for time off to attend x appointment. Although, I have been able to arrange several appointments for non-working days, I'm afraid this one is non-negotiable."

Even my 16 year old daughter can work out how to do this for her Saturday job and why it is a good idea to look as though you are being as accommodating and helpful as possible even when you aren't.

Not all workplaces are the same, @DontMakeMeShushYou , I’m sure your daughter knows that, too

Thanks for advice.

I'd take the advice that @cavebaby gave. I'd also consider suggesting to the person that is a little aggrieved by your appointments clashing with when you're supposed to be in work, that you're open to a rejig of the days that you're working and not working but that there is no guarantee that your consultant won't change their working days too. I know you mentioned that your child is in childcare on certain days of the week but if needed, you could approach that nursery/childcare facility to see if there was any scope to move the days that your child is there.
By changing one thing, it might actually have a trickle down effect and help other people out (then again, it might not).

I realise that time off for your pre-natal appointments is protected under law but there is nothing stopping you from trying to be helpful to your employer too.

I'd say 'ok, I'll try' with a smile and then go to your appointments whenever you need to.

Indeed! I'm afraid it sounds as though you've chosen a really shitty place to work if having a conversation with your boss is an absolute no-no.

As you were.

Well it is, in some places - I’m not sure where your daughter works (obviously) but if she works in a cafe and sees the owner on every shift, that’s fine.

But if she works for Costa or another big chain and the system in place is that it has to be signed off by the big boss, an area manager or similar, who is only in ‘her’ costa a couple of times a month, it’s not going to be as easy, is it? I’m not trying to sound like I’m being purposefully obstructive as I wouldn’t do that, but equally, the ‘just tell your boss that …’ isn’t always how workplaces operate.

Honestly, just say 'Yes I will try' and then forget about it and go to your appointments as it suits you.

Bootlicking corporate companies is pointless and if the manager pushes this they can get into trouble. Dont stress about a crappy middle manager.

If you address your boss the way you've addressed me it's no wonder they're getting arsey.
You've chosen to get offended when I advised my reasons for agreeing with both sides. You seem to have missed where I acknowledged some appointments can't be changed

I'd say 'I'll try' then carry on regardless. Not a chance I would swap my working days.

@Littlegoth

so refreshing to see your sensible post

@mummyh2016 tbh you started being shitty and insinuating OP was taking the piss out of her employer

I would mention my legal right to paid time off, state you have no control over when the appointments are and ask your boss to accept the situation.

I think some people don’t realise that not all part timers can change their days off to attend appointments. For example I’m a teacher and have timetabled classes on my part time days. I can’t just swap. The children have other timetabled classes on the other days.

I have also been through the whole antenatal appointments system. Ours was particularly frustrating. Clinic only runs one day a week at my surgery - and you can’t just go somewhere else. And appointments were only booked consecutively after already booked in appointments so no saying could I go for an 4pm appointment when the calendar for that day is only booked up to 10am and so you’re only offered the 10:30 appointment. It was really stressful. I worked full time during my first pregnancy and tried to make appointments for the start of end of a day. Luckily at that time I wasn’t teaching and worked a mix of office and from home and organised my own calendar as I was among and about leading training. I could also ‘make up’ ours at the end of the day despite being entitled to paid time off for them. I didn’t know how lucky I was until I returned to teaching and had to have regular appointments for one of my children (no paid either for a child) and the clinics she was attending were always on a specific day. At the end of the school year I ended up asking to change my days for the following year as I knew we had to continue these appointments for a while. And these were the reason I was part time.

Back to OP. Just contact your manager and explain that the clinic only runs on certain days. If you are able to make up the time later or swap your days then do offer but appreciate this isn’t always possible. You’re entitled to the time off and you can take the discrimination further if you wanted to.

This