Potentially awkward career development conversations

[Sarah1217]

A few months ago my organisation went through a restructure and I was put at risk of redundancy. A new team was created with several jobs at my current level and one that was a promotion. This team very closely aligned to what I've done in previous roles at other companies so I applied.

85 people applied for the promotion and I made it to the final round but I just missed out. I managed to secure another role on the team but now my new manager wants to have a career development conversation with me. He's lovely but seems completely clueless that I applied for and came very close to getting his job.

When I joined this company a few years ago it was a bit of a bait and switch so while I have a nice salary and title, the level of responsibility is a lot less than I expected. How do I express that my career goals are to move into a more senior position without inadvertently sounding resentful that I didn't get the promotion? Should I bring it up that I applied for his role? Ideally I would like to start addressing some of the feedback from the interview process so that the next time a promotion opportunity comes up I will be successful but I'm not sure how to broach the subject.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you handle it?

How do I express that my career goals are to move into a more senior position without inadvertently sounding resentful that I didn't get the promotion?

It's a perfectly normal and reasonable goal to express - hence the 85 applications. Not everyone could be appointed but that doesn't mean any of them have ceased to hold it as a goal!

Ideally I would like to start addressing some of the feedback from the interview process so that the next time a promotion opportunity comes up I will be successful

And again, a normal and reasonable - and highly constructive - reaction. I'd expect some of the other 84 people who were unsuccessful to be doing the same! It wouldn't surprise me if it was a factor in the meeting being arranged.

I would just say what your career goals are and that you would like to work on the feedback received, what support you need from your manager in this, etc. Practical, constructive, normal.

I really think the awkwardness here is just in your head. Don't overthink it - unless you whinge about missing out on the role, there's no reason your entirely professional career goals and development intentions would be interpreted as "bitterness".

You say he is clueless, but I would think it very likely that he does already know you applied for his job, as his line manager surely would have given him the heads up, as he would be managing you. Did you not get any feedback after the interview, or could you not ask the interview panel?

It sounds like he is just wanting to help you forward with your career, so just take whatever help he can offer. I don’t see any point in mentioning you applied for his job, just say you are keen on progressing and take it from there.

I managed a lady once who'd applied for my job, not got it but accepted the team role.

She told me openly she'd applied and that one day she wanted my job.

I really respected her honesty and wanted to work with her to achieve her goals. She was basically my deputy and I'd hand over work to her when I was on leave, included her where I could etc.

Only someone shit at their job and worried about it would have a problem having that conversation with you.

Otherwise they should be competely supportive in helping you reach your goals.

I'd start out by not describing him as clueless. Whether he knows you applied or not isn't within his control, but he knows he beat 84 other people to it, so he knows some people he manages applied!

There is nothing wrong in telling him that you applied, you'd like to work on the feedback, and your aspiration is to progress to a role similar to his. He'll be hoping to progress too one hopes, so it's understandable. Outline what opportunities you'd hope to have, and work on it from there.

It's really positive to hear that this wouldn't be an issue for most people. I was bullied by a manager at my old company so it's good to get a sense check and remind myself that most people I work with won't be like that.

I didn't mean clueless in that he is unintelligent. Unfortunately senior management has a tendency to not be very transparent, or to just forget to share important information. I assumed that of course someone would have told him, but when he brought up career development he said something about how it's also fine if I'm happy just staying where I am, as some people don't necessarily want to progress. That's what made me think maybe he didn't know.