My manager didn't want me to tell anyone that I've handed my notice in

[OU1997]

I handed my notice in on Friday (they counter offered) and he told me not to tell anyone that I've handed my notice in.

Why?

Didn't you ask him that?

Why not ask them ?

I didn't ask in the moment, I'm not at work until Monday and it's annoying me

If you are currently in the negotiation phase then I can see why he wouldn't want you to say anything. If you are thinking of accepting their offer then keep it quiet or the offer may e withdrawn.

Although once you are passed that I can't see why you can't tell people. However, depending on your role your employer may wish to announce this himself due to the possibility it can upset other employees/customers if they don't know who is taking over from you. So a bit of thought to this and allow your employer some time to formulate a plan would go a long way to keeping goodwill between you both.

Obviously it verruca depends on your role and seniority as to the reasons.

Is it so that your manager can announce it at the same time as announcing plans for your replacement?

So your manager can handle the communication re: you leaving and a replacement.

Your manager will want to confirm the arrangements that will be in place to cover your absence. They will want to do this before they tell people you are going so that they don’t have to field a load of questions that they don’t yet have answers for. It is the professional thing to do.

I had this when I left a job of 9 years last year. I had already told a couple of work friends by this point. My manager said it was to keep morale going as lots of people had left (and also left after me). She was aware I had told some people already. However this put me in an awkward situation as I couldn't organise my leaving do properly as I couldn't tell anyone. I left around Christmas time so most places required numbers. And it was actually worse for morale as people then officially found out I was leaving with a week to go and wanted to know why I hadn't told them sooner. I was really pissed off at management for making me keep it a secret as I wanted to be transparent and it just made me look bad.

I used to work for a company where they made people who were leaving keep it secret for ages. Was so bizarre...always made me think there was a culture problem I wasn't aware of. Such a controlling gesture

As a manager I've always wanted team members to hear from me if someone is leaving so that I can tell them what the plans are for recruitment, interim cover, putting pieces of work on hold or whatever - basically information and reassurance about the impacts on them. That can sometimes take a little while to put in place so may mean a delay of a few days/a week.

I'd usually explain that to the person leaving though.

I had this before. People leaving can be unsettling for a team. People stress about their possible increase in workload while a replacement is found. So in my case they wanted to manage the fall out. I can see they don’t want people fretting over Xmas.

Great autocorrect

I've had this on a 3 month notice period and as a senior manager. Finally allowed to announce a month before I left (was threatened with Gross misconduct if I told anyone prior). Made it completely impossible to do a handover and consequently a lot of people left. Zero sympathy for the company however as they dug this hole themselves!

If they have given you a counter offer they will be very unwilling to advertise that fact to the rest of the team. A) they might now wish to hang onto others as much as you and b) it sets a precedent that others may try to exploit.

I don't think there's normally anything legally preventing you telling others (unless it says so in your contact or in a company policy you have access to) But it's a common request to keep quiet for a week or two while your manager figures out whether/how to replace you and tells anyone who ought to hear it direct from them not on the grapevine.

Are you staying or leaving?

@Sux2buthen thanks for bothering to read the whole thing 😀
Verruca = very much

Usually you'd be asked not to tell people if the company is counter offering. The best thing for you to do for yourself would be to comply with the request. In a way they could be doing you a favour and in return you'd keep what's going on private. It's no one else's business and can unsettle teams too.

That's odd.

As a manager I usually agree with the person leaving when to tell the rest of the team once I receive their notice, usually the news is shared with the team at the next weekly team meeting.

Then we announce it to the rest of the organisation.

I don't see the need for secrecy especially if you have made it clear you will not accept a counter offer and are definitely leaving.

Frankly cover arrangement are not your problem...

You need to be able to start planning your handover and be able to tell colleagues and external contacts at this point that you are leaving and that you are not taking on new projects, especially if your notice is only a month.

Because it leaves you in an awkward position if you have to turn requests down/complete projects and you can't communicate openly with colleagues/contacts as to why you are doing this.

I would ask the manager for a clear date as to when the news can be announced and state that you need this to be done so you can complete your work correctly and update people.

I think this is normal as it can be quite unsettling for the team if a resignation is announced and no one knows what will happen or who will be the replacement. Usually management prefer to have a plan of action in place before announcing.

Also, if they've counter-offered and you are still open to staying, keeping quiet maintains professionalism as it means you're not discussing potential promotions/pay rises with everyone else as it could cause friction in the team.

Once you've made a decision to go though, I assume you will be able to tell them all at some point as a handover will need to take place.

This exact thing happened to my colleague. He had already told me and was then told not to tell anyone. I would be taking on some of his work in the interim so it was important I knew. It’s bonkers to keep it a secret

If you're still considering the counter offer they won't want anyone else to know. If you say you've handed in your notice then change your mind, people might put 2 and 2 together. Managers won't want staff threatening to quite with expectation of s counter-offer. Puts them in a really weak position as it'll become known that they're keen to to retain staff and will offer more money to do so.

If you've turned down the counter offer, it's just to let them manage the communication and messaging. Nothing worse than it going round as a rumour and everyone hearing different versions at different stages

quite normal. It’s really difficult to recruit just so so probably Managing the comms to the benefit of the company and those that remain. Quite different in a large organisation where people come and go all the time.

1. In case you accept counter offer
2. They want to work out what they are going to do without you so they can tell team at same time.
3. They are worried once people know you're leaving and ask where to etc others may follow!