Off sick - constant checks on me, feeling harassed

[BreatheAndFocus]

Hi - I’m off sick at the moment. I’ve been quite unwell - fever, bad chest, dizziness, vomiting. I reported my sickness to work - and they’ve phoned and texted me constantly ‘to see how I am’ and to ask if I’ll be at meetings, am I better now, etc etc.

I’m feeling really harassed by this and like they’re pressuring me to come back. I didn’t think they were allowed to do this? Is there any rule or guidance online about contacting people when they’re off sick that I can quote at them. It’s been every single day and it’s annoying and downright rude. They even asked me how I think I got ill - which is a bloody stupid question when I’ve clearly got some virus. How do they think people get ill?? Just feeling so stressed by it.

Any links to official guidance would be very welcome. TIA.

Oops, meant to say that this is my first period of sickness in almost two years, so it’s not like I’m sick every fortnight or anything.

I'd class my boss as a friend so if ever we're ill we check how we're feeling but not to the point of asking when we'll be back. Can you tell them you're turning your phone off to rest. See if they get the message

There is no rule or guidance - it depends on their policy. Switch your phone off or put it on ignore. There is nothing that says you must answer.

Who is it that's phoning you? Is it your manager or random colleagues?

Sorry you're so unwell. And yes, they shouldn't be doing this. It's not going to help you get better.

How long have you been out for and are you officially signed off by a doctor? I don't think it's unreasonable of them to want to know if you're planning to attend meetings etc, they need to plan for your absence.

HR Director here. Policies vary.

It’s good practice to stay in touch. How frequently should depend on the circumstances. Once a week would seem reasonable from what you’ve said. Could you suggest that? (Providing your company doesn’t dictate daily calls?)

Did you submit a sick note?

It sounds unreasonable to me. They should agree contact with you. For a short-term illness, a daily call would be reasonable but it should be at a time that considers your illness - e.g. if you are sleeping badly, not first thing in the morning. Hope you feel better soon.

There isn’t really anything official about fitnotes - they’re advisory.

Do you have a sick note? If not, i don’t think daily contact is unreasonable (depending on their tone of course). If you do have a sick note I’d expect you to be left alone till towards the end of it.

This sounds somewhat unreasonable. How long have you been off for?

Hi, I’ve been there and it’s actually policy that they check in on you regularly, but regularly would be like once a week to find out how you are, keep you in the loop and find out when you think you might be back. I know it might feel like harassment but perhaps they do genuinely care about your well-being but if they’ve also got a team to run then they need to know how best to organise things and also won’t want to completely shift the team around if you’re only off for a few days, but I do understand how frustrating it is when you’re not well, the last thing on your mind is work!

If you’v been signed off for a set period of time then that should give them an indication of when you might be returning to work, but the best thing to do is tell him that the constant phone calls are making you feel worse, and perhaps see if they can compromise on just weekly check ins. I’ve had experiences where I felt harassed like yourself, but also had zero contact and basically feeling unemployed and like they didn’t care, so somewhere in the middle is the best thing, that way you also won’t feel as anxious when you do return to work.

Failing that, get in contact with a union rep and let them know how you feel.

Depends on the company and how long you have been off. I have been off 8 weeks because of a bereavement. After 4 weeks it became a long term absence and I have to meet with my manager every fortnight. Its just her coming to my house, but I don't have any contact from her in-between this.

Can you get hold of your sickness policy?

At my work we have to call in daily if we're sick. If we don't, they'd call us to check we're ok. The exception is if we're signed off for a specific period of time.

As a manager, I would contact someone each day unless I had already been told they would not be in that day.

So the answer depends on what you've told them. Have you sent in a sick note? Told them you don't expect to be well until next week?

It's not been common practice anywhere I've worked to just say you're sick and then not come neck until you're ready, with no communication in between. (Unless it's only 1 day.)

I’m surprised everyone seems to think how should stay in touch… I think once you’ve told them you’re ill and you’ve said ‘I’ll let you know when I can be back, possibly next week etc’ then I don’t think you’ve any obligation to speak to them after that. I’m not surprised you feel harassed! This would really stress me out. I’m in France where the work culture is obvs v different but here work are not allowed to contact you when you’re off sick- you give in a sick bit which has the dates on and that’s that. Even when
i was on maternity my colleagues were told not to message me constantly as it would be seen as harassment 😂 we all get ok so thought it was quite funny but still x

*come back

France isn’t the same as the U.K.

It should be a two way thing. Most companies have policies outlining the expectations. It’s not good to leave someone festering.

They are completely unreasonable and you need to ignore these random calls and messages from them.

Usually you have to inform your workplace that you are unwell first thing in the morning. Then I would do the same thing the following day if you are still unwell and so on. You don't have to communicate with them throughout the day after that or answer dumb questions about whether you will attend a specific meeting when you have already informed them you will be off sick that day.

You can self-certify for up to 7 days, after that they will need to see a note from your GP which will tell them how long you will be off sick for.

If the GP gives you a note for one week or two week your workplace does not need to contact you beyond checking at the end of the period if you are coming back as expected or will need more time and provide another note.

The point is if you are off sick you are not available to answer work-related messages or calls.

In our workplace if you are self certifying you are required to call in once per day as early as is reasonable to confirm non attendance.
If you are signed off we would require a call a few days before you were due to return to see how you are and the likelihood of returning on the expected date.
If you didn't call, we'd call you with the same regularity.
Can you pre-empt their messages by laying out your expectations (it's usually possible when I'll to say I doubt I'll be in tomorrow etc) and always calling first thing in the morning. Then it is on your terms. You can also then say "obviously this means I won't make the weekly management meeting, please send my apologies" etc. Sometimes if we expect to be off for a particular stretch (as I was with COVID) a manage rwould clear our diaries for us.

I know the working culture and laws are very very different. What do you mean by ‘leaving someone festering?’ If you’ve got a colleague who is very ill and you know they are isolated with no family etc and you are friends then yes of course reach out.. but I don’t think that’s what we are talking about here? Sounds like it’s different colleagues all sending messages and posing Q’s on return to work etc - surely a return to work is between your manager and you or HR and you? I think it’s really unprofessional to create a culture where your staff feel obligated to discuss their personal health with other staff who aren’t necessarily their manager or HR. x

We have to phone in every day, if we are off without a sick note. We absolutely hate. It. Just trust us. And let us wallow for a while, without thinking about work!

We have this. NHS. Call every day unless covered by a sick note

Why not call your boss and hammer out a contact schedule. That's what we do. Agree the level of contact and by what means. You aren't a piss-taker, so I think an every other day contact by pjone is reasonable. Every other day is excessive.

*phone