How does anyone juggle small kids and a career?

[Worriedwait]

I've got two children aged 4 and 1. I returned to work from maternity leave three months ago, and I'm drowning.

My return to work was terribly managed. I won't go into the detail here, but they didn't do a single thing properly to bring me back into the team and I had to get the union involved. Since them, I've had my confidence and competence gradually chipped away. I'm just switching off completely. I'm in a team of people many years younger than me with no idea about life with small children. I feel totally alienated and like I have no role anymore.

This general sense of demotivation and frustration is compounded by the fact that my children have been ill almost constantly since mid-October. I'm going insane. We have no family support and my husband has run out of paid holiday, so I've had to cover the bulk of these days using my annual leave. I've tried to make up for the lost time in the evenings, sending emails and trying to stay on top of things when the kids are in bed I only work three days a week, and there's only so much I can make up for

And now I'm bloody ill as well. I was up vomiting last night and took the morning off work. Logged in this afternoon (I work from home) to undisguised irritation and zero pleasantries from my team leader (who, incidentally, was junior to me before I went on my last maternity leave).

I'm feeling so unhappy. I was really good at my job, lining myself up for a promotion and with some real achievements under my belt. One more baby later and I'm exhausted, distracted, frustrated and feeling utterly trapped. I don't know what to do . How do others manage? This feels totally unsustainable.

Hi, can't directly help or change anything but I felt similarly stressed out at the 3 month mark return with two children (4 and nearly 2). I have been back now for nearly 12 months and it is getting better. But I still feel fear when I see nursery calling.

I found with my second the level of illness has been unreal. So many days of child 1 gets sick, then child 2 and then you. We have had 3 vomiting bugs on top of covid, tonsillitis, hand, foot and mouth and other cough/colds. The baby gets a temp with most colds. And now the nursery has scarlet fever.

I don't have a support system, it's just me and my partner but the difference is that I do have a good manager who is flexible. I work evenings to catch up and prioritise like mad during the day.

The level of illness has reduced now. Hang in and the level of illness should hopefully reduce once their immune systems build up. With work - again ride it out and see where you are in 3-6 months. I felt like quitting at 3 months and now it is manageable.