I interview terribly, please help

[User15643289]

Please help.

I am really good at being shortlisted for jobs, but I interview terribly. The feedback I get is always the same, I just don't answer the questions in the right way. I leave interviews and within seconds I'm kicking myself thinking 'well of course I should have mentioned x when they asked me about y'.

I am an extrovert and an extremely competent public speaker - presentations are part of my job!!! I'm good at my job too. For my role (think trainer sort of thing) I usually have to give a presentation and then have an interview. My presentations are good and always well received but I fall down in the interview panel. I have now got to the point where I feel I'm so bad at them that end up really nervous and it makes them even worse.

For example in the last interview I had they asked me what I was passionate about with the role. I have a part of the role I'm REALLY passionate about, but I just waffled and ended up not mentioning it (what?!). It's almost like when I'm asked a question I have no idea how to answer. I hardly ever manage to mention things from my CV or my long list of achievements. I feel like if I was asked why I liked apples I'd bang on about an apple flavoured ice cream I once had or something.

When I'm presenting and training, it's all about approachability and being friendly, kind and just nice. My job involves a lot of support and showing compassion, I'm great at this, I'm just not very good at interviews. Informal or more natural discussions are more where my strengths lie.

I'm the sort of person people come to for help, I go out of my way to help other people and I get on with everyone. I'm genuinely easy going. So I'm fairly confident I'm not putting people off by being 'the wrong fit' if you know what I mean? It is literally just that I'm shit at answering the questions.

Please help. I have another interview in two weeks and I'm getting desperate. I've been out of work for a few months now after a long contract ended and I now need my salary back!

Just read this back and even my posts are waffley. Luckily my job doesn't involve any writing 🤣.

What sort of questions have you been asked in the past? Can you sort out possible questions and write down answers? So take the question about what you're passionate about, if you were answering that now with no pressure, what would you say? Put down some bullet points. Then do that for a few more. You could even write them on cards and take them into the interview if you want to.

Do you know anybody you could practice with? Especially good if they're not afraid to give you clear feedback.
Agree that you need to anticipate the questions and try get a few good answers learned/semi-learned so you can restate these.

Practice, practice practice. Refer to your notes, the panel does so should you.

Lots of you tube videos to look at.

Ask somebody to do a practice interview, National Careers Service provide free career guidance, book yourself an advisor who can do this for you.

Any suggestions for good YouTube videos?

That feels very familiar! Have you had feedback about specifically why you weren't successful in that interview?

I use websites which give interview question examples and work through them, writing an answer or at least making notes - I find that having thought about them before and therefore having my experience fresher in my mind helps recall it in the interview. I've used this list before:
https://www.monster.com/career-advice/article/100-potential-interview-questions

I know some people who take notes into interviews with them, just bullet points of key achievements or experiences they don't want to forget. I'll be doing this next time, too.

If it feels right, could make a little joke at the beginning about how you feel completely comfortable presenting/training but for some reason interviews floor you?

I agree about practice with a friend
Make lots of notes then condense them down and bring in a few key points to your answers.
If you ever think you might waffle ask to take a minute to collect your thoughts. Ask them to repeat the question.
Remember the panel want you to do well in the interview.

I’d agree about practicing. That time spent on thinking about what kind of questions you’ve been asked before or that are likely to come from the job description will hopefully help keep you focussed. What are the key things/skills/experiences you want them to know about you and how does that link to the job description? What kind of questions would let you evidence that?
Also, a general tip to focus on your role in what you did and don’t hide behind ‘we did’ or ‘it was decided’ - say ‘I did’ even if you acknowledge the wider context was as part of a group. Nothing wrong with scribbling a few notes down to come back to, if you can see that it’s a multi-layered question and you’re worried about losing focus. You can also ask for a repeat of the question if you need to, or to clarify an aspect.

And finally, in case it applies to you or someone else reading it, it may be that an employer would consider providing the interview questions ahead of time/in a different format as a ‘reasonable adjustment’ if e.g. the interviewee has declared a disability or condition to HR and suggests this as a way to remove barriers to the recruitment process in relation to their specific disability or condition.

Are you prepping by identifying examples of the competencies specified and practising structured answers? STAR is a very popular answer structure.

OP I’m the same, I interview terribly, waffle pointlessly and never get the right point across.

You’ve already been given loads of good advice on here, especially about practicing. For my last interview I also made a list of points I knew I had to cover, such as specific projects I’d led and pieces of work I’d produced. They were 100% relevant to the role I was interviewing for but I knew I wouldn’t remember to cover them otherwise. I also practiced using them as example answers to the usual behavioural kind of questions. It was undoubtedly the best interview I’ve ever had and I got the job.

All the best for your interview 🌹

It can be useful to look through your past experience and pick out 6-8 examples of things you have done (a project, or a difficult decision you took, a goal you achieved etc etc) and write them down as ‘model answers’. These can then be practised a few times and you can use them for different questions, adapting to fit the exact question they ask. It can take the stress out of thinking on your feet.

To format the model answers, you might find the STAR approach useful. You can Google it, but basically:
S - describe the situation / context
T - explain the task
A - explain the action you took
R - explain the results

good luck!

prepare and practice. Get someone to do a practice interview with you. If it’s an online interview you can stick notes behind your computer and refer to them! Don’t rush in and answer immediately, it’s fine to take a few seconds to digest the question.

Well I'm fairly sure I have ADHD but I am not comfortable with asking for the questions in advance, though that's a fab suggestion! That would 100% help.

So I have seen STAR mentioned before but I'm just not sure how to use it. So for example if the questions is 'where do you see yourself to be in 5 years time' or 'tell us about how you manage other people' I don't quite know what to say?! I'd end up telling you about a holiday I went on probably 🤣. I'm not even joking. At the end I'd add 'in 5 years time' though I'd like to be managing a bigger team'

I like the idea of taking a piece of paper with my main achievements on it so I remember to use these. I don't ever remember otherwise. I'll definitely do that.

I do try and pause before answering but my brain doesn't let me formulate the answers... It sounds so weird but I feel like I have to start talking to work out what I want to say. This is in life in general not just in interviews. I'm not a thinker I'm a talker and a do-er.

I agree with the above about prep and practice. In my sector, interviewers generally want specific examples of when you’ve done something, achieved a particular outcome or shown a particular attribute. So swot up on the role and come armed with concrete examples - if the role is for the apple marketing board, you’ll be ready to talk about why you like apples! Also practice things like why you want the role, what would you bring to it - standard interview type things. And definitely focus on what you did, not we.

When you’re interviewing a waffler, it can be hard to sift through all the verbiage to find the nuggets you need. So it might help for you to slow down, take a breath and repeat the question back to the interviewer to make sure you are answering the right question eg “so, an example of when I successfully persuaded someone to eat an apple?”. That can help focus your mind and give you time to process. I’d always rather people take time to understand what we’re asking straight up rather than just talking and hoping they land on the right thing. Also if you find yourself rambling off on a tangent, and especially if the interviewers are starting to glaze over a bit, do stop yourself and ask them if you’ve answered the question. I’ve also frequently had people stop when they’ve realised they’ve gone astray and start again on a better track.

Good luck - I hate interviews but I’ve been on a lot of panels which has been really helpful in refining my approach.

Are you sure you are not just answering too quickly. Also are you too worried about filling pauses in the conversation or when you answer. Or might it be you are just talking a bit too much?

There's nothing wrong with taking a moment before you start to answer the question or by starting with a filler answer such as 'that's an interesting question' to give yourself a little more time to compose yourself.

Coming across as nervous is ok especially if you have given a good presentation . It shows that you care!

Not much advice for you OP, but just to say, you’re not alone. I tend to overthink the question and miss out mentioning obvious attributes. I might get some practice with a colleague next time.

Sorry, just seen your update. Lots of people talk to think, especially if you have a busy buzzy brain. I think then putting the question back into your own words might help point your brain in the right direction.

Would it help to have something physical to help keep you grounded and focused eg a bracelet to discreetly twang or a ring to spin?

My dad used to interview for a really big global company and he was always adamant about never taking notes in to an interview - it looks sloppy and unprofessional. You've clearly done enough interviews and know your job inside out, so you should know the sorts of questions you will be asked. Start with the main point then fill it out, eg, where do you want to be in 5 years?

In 5 years I want to be managing my own team. Recently, in my current job I had an opportunity to run a part of the project and the feedback I received from my supervisor was positive (give specific examples). Additionally, I'm a very energetic and enthusiastic person which is essential in encouraging people to work with me.

Plan all your answers like they're a script and learn them. It will really reduce the stress.

Oh I feel your pain op - I had to check I didn’t write the post, lol. And I have recruitment as part of my job! - but find it so hard to practice what I preach! I give great presentations, but can win gold medals for waffling when answering questions! I try to remember to slow down and I take a minute to write down the question I have been asked then focus on my answer. I also prep some potential answers to questions I might be asked, eg re recent achievements, so I can stay focused. I just landed a new senior role after a few epic waffly fails, so it worked!

Anticipate likely questions, write out the Q & A and practice. Get lots of different people to give you mock interviews - give them all the information about the role, your notes and let them devise ad hoc questions. As part of my prep for my last promotion panel I was filmed, scary but it’s easier to see what works and what doesn’t.

A book I found very practical was Why you? 101 interview questions you’ll never fear again, by James Reed. It’s on audible so you can listen while you are doing other things.

Always ask for a copy of the job specification.
Then make a note of the skills they're looking for.
Then prepare some STAR examples based around those competencies. Be really strict with the structure and practice lots beforehand. Get a friend to "test" you... are you telling a coherent story about what happened?
As long as you can talk in a structured way about a time you worked as a team, exceeded a client's expectations, prioritised your work... you're mostly there. Most examples can be varied a little to meet the specific question.
Take notes... it'll focus your answers and stop you waffling,

I’ve looked at those questions and in the same position! Thank you for raising this- off the research

Being able to speak confidently in public is a real skill and it requires the ability to waffle, to a degree, and not "dry up" on stage.

I'm the opposite - I couldn't do the off-script waffle for a presentation in front of people, but I interview really well. I am succinct, I know how long/short/deep an answer should be based on the question and I naturally mirror the style of the interviewer/company culture as gleaned from the general atmosphere before and during the interview. (This isn't about trying to exactly replicate in a painting by numbers kind of way, it's more "tuning in" to the general vibe and modifying in that direction whilst keeping your own personality).

It could be that as talking, bond-building and public speaking are key elements of your skill-set, that you are subconsciously replicating that in an interview situation. Time is often of the essence in interviews and interviewers often like to note key words and phrases from answers that they can jot down to mull over afterwards. This can prove difficult with a waffley answer. I'm sure you would be brilliant if you practiced getting to the point of a question and cutting down on the length of some of your answers, paired with your natural confidence and ease in speaking in front of people.

In the week before, get the job spec or essential criteria, and paste it into an Excel document/Google sheets. Then re-write each duty as a question using the 'tell us about the time' method, then write out your answer notes.

E.g Tell us about the time you had to think on your feet?

(STAR method) When I was in my previous role I was involved in hosting business meetings and conferences. On one occasion, the caterers let us down at the last minute. We had 30 delegates expecting hot food, with a variety of dietary requirements and less than an hour to sort it out. I persuaded the owner of the jacket potato stand down the road, to provide over 30 baked potatoes and trays of assorted toppings. A junior colleague ran to Tesco for me and got big bags of salad and a variety of puddings. It wasn't quite what we'd planned but everyone got fed and seemed happy. I guess I can add catering to my CV now! 🙂

Then practice, practice, practice (if possible with a friend). You can initially refer to your notes during the practice, but eventually the answers will become easier.

By the way, your 'waffling' is great for the dreaded 'Tell us about your weaknesses' question.

"Despite usually being a confident public speaker, I have a tendency to go off topic. I have found that preparing notes beforehand helps me to focus my speech. I can then refer to these notes as bullet points to structure my speech and make sure I stay on topic and within any time constraints".

I think @Pinkittens makes a good point about the more 'informal' style getting in your way
I am exactly the same as you and fall at the last hurdle frequently.
I'm almost certain I've ADHD despite being told otherwise by my consultant.
I recently asked for reasonable adjustments due to executive function issues and was given extra time for assessments and interviews.
I passed the assessments but am on a long list for the interview and may not be called (civil service) and I'm just working on developing my processing skills and being more methodical day to day in the hope I can perform better at interview.
I believe I forget and downplay so much of my work that I need to be taking time on a monthly basis to summarise achievements, keep a brag file of sorts; and add this to my excel sheet of answers
Also, doing a voice recording of your answer can help with refining technique.
Good luck OP