Sick leave rolling into mat leave advice

[nevernevermind]

Hi,

Sorry if this isn't right section - couldn't decide whether to stick this in pregnancy, employment issues or mental health. I have been signed off work sick for over 2 months now due to severe perinatal depression and panic attacks. I tried to go back to work 2 weeks ago and just couldn't manage it. I signed off sick again and have been off for almost 2 weeks, soon to be 3. When the GP was writing the note I told him I'm planning to take early maternity leave starting on the 16th Oct (due in January) so I can have max amount of time preparing and getting myself well before baby arrives. Due to this he set the sick note to expire on the 14th Oct, which means my time off sick effectively rolls into my maternity leave.

I previously sent my MatB1 and intended start of due date to HR at work and they confirmed they received it but asked if I wanted to take my annual leave before - I said I would use it at the end instead and explained my reasons for taking such early maternity leave (11 weeks before due date). However I was signed off sick and haven't been able to face looking at emails or texts since. Is there anything else I need to do to ensure my maternity leave will happen properly?

I feel quite guilty that I haven't been able to do a proper handover but I wasn't planning to take so much time off sick so maybe they are already prepared? I am really frightened to look at the email from my boss in case they are saying I can't take sick leave and not handover before maternity leave starts. I don't have a particularly unique or complex role, I work in admin for context. I also feel a lot of shame over the mental health issues I'm experiencing and sharing this with work so having any conversation with them about it seems unbearable at the moment and truthfully makes me panic and want to self harm.

Any advice? I am guessing I should just try to grit my teeth and make myself look at the emails on Monday before my sick leave ends so I can tidy up the loose ends but I can't understate how anxious I feel about it. I just want to be free of work for a good few months and not have to explain myself. Did others have to arrange a meeting after handing in MatB1 to confirm anything? What do you think I'm expected to clarify if anything? I wish I could just cease communication.

Apologies for how long and disjointed this might be. I am really struggling.

Oh love. I'm so sorry to hear you're struggling. Has being off improved anything at all?

With respect to work - you've given them the date to start your Maternity leave and it will start on that date. The company can encourage and suggest that you take annual leave beforehand but can't force you to do so.

If you want to change the start date of your maternity leave then you need to give at least 28 days notice. So it's too late now although you could ask them if you wanted to

Please don't worry about work - they will have probably anticipated that you were unlikely to come back before mat leave. It's really not that uncommon.

You don't need to do anything. Your mat leave will start automatically. I hope you are ok and manage to get some time to relax before your lovely baby arrives x

In terms of a meeting - not necessarily. You should have had a letter with your maternity rights details on including details of the length of your leave and pay expected. Some companies will hold a meeting to talk about whether you want to stay in contact during maternity leave and to discuss risk assessments whilst you're working etc. None of that would happen if you have been off sick

Thank you - this is reassuring, and thank you for being kind x

I hope you feel better now that you are signed off. You and your baby are your absolute priority here. Make all your decisions based on that focus.

Just to say though that if you have an unopened email from your boss you will find it hard to relax properly until you look at it. It's quite possible it is factual and supportive of you. Otherwise it will build up in your head. Maybe ask your partner or a friend to read it for you if that would help?

I finished early in my last pregnancy for similar reasons. I hadn't planned it, just hit an absolute wall before my mat leave was due. By time baby arrived I was ready for it and rested rather than the stressed wound up person I had been two and a half months before.