bullying micromanager

[helpmep]

I'm pregnant 20 weeks. I work in retail in central london as a shop assistant. I was off sick in the start of my pregnancy and returned 3 weeks ago.

Being based in Central London, the shop floor is small and the stock is in the cellar. Since becoming pregnant I have realised there are certain situations that make me anxious. Taking the underground (i now take a bus). using a lift and the cellar in particular at work makes me feel claustrophobic.

on my return to work I made it clear that I would prefer not to work in the cellar and if I could be based on the shop floor, I explained that I feel anxious in the cellar and it makes me uncomfortable and i feel i cant breathe. I was told by my manager that it was part of my job and that nothing can be done about it and refusal to do my job would be seen as gross misconduct.

I got a note from the GP which explained my claustrophobia and that I should not work in enclosed spaces.

My manager, the same one above, has said the space is not enclosed, its pretty large and he doesn't agree that my concerns are genuine. The risk assessment (carried out by the same manager) also says no risk.

He's also started doing this thing, i think the term would be micromanaging, where he sends me a jobs list every morning of what he wants me to do that day and almost 85% of it requires me to stay in the cellar. (he’s never done this before, i’ve been here 5 years) I’m pretty sure it’s intentional. and then every couple of hours he’ll come up to me and ask me ‘is it done yet?’. I've been finding excuses not to do them and busying myself on the shop floor but today i got pulled aside for insubordination. It’s making me really uncomfortable, am i being bullied? or is it in my head? what should I do? If it wasnt for my pregnancy i would have left and changed jobs, but i’m in my ‘calculation for smp’ period. I can’t afford to leave.

Have you had an HSE review, if not get one, and escalate past him to HR.

Contact Pregnant Then Screwed and ACAS.

By law I believe an employer should make reasonable adjustments for pregnancy and it sounds like he’s deliberately being obstructive.

Is there a HR department? If so, definitely raise this with them. Sounds like he's being difficult for the sake of being difficult. Maybe he's trying to force a resignation, which comes under constructive dismissal. What an absolute idiot. Was he difficult at all before you became pregnant?

Speak to HR and/or seek legal advice.

He was so lovely before, I can't believe he's the same person. I've been there 5 years and have loved every moment of going into work, but since I've asked not to work in the cellar its become one big game to him, i can't sleep or eat on Sundays thinking about the week ahead. I have this constant stomach cramp thinking about it. I did consider constructive dismissal but the reality of my situation is that i wouldn’t be able to find another job as easily especially with my obvious bump. I think part of me feels humiliated too if that makes sense? Like i've asked not to do a particular thing because it makes me uncomfortable but because i work for you, you can make me do it and watch me squirm. I am considering signing off with work-stress until i can take my maternity leave even tho i know it would leave me broke.

we have one person who deals with HR and she’s his best friend. So that wouldn’t do me any favours. it would completely backfire.

Is it a large retail chain? If so there will be more than his friend in HR. Contact ACAS/PTS as suggested above

Definitely phone ACAS - they'll give step by step advice.

Do you have colleagues who could swap tasks with you? If two of you approach him to say x is happy to work in cellar (and you put it in an email), he'll be hard put to it to claim he's being reasonable.

If I had to approach his friend in HR I'd be good and two-faced about it, in writing - y is attempting to support me with lists of that needs to be done in the cellar but I'm afraid I'm still anxious about going against written medical advice while pregnant so wondered if you could liaise with him to work out another solution or if there's a formal process you'd recommend so that I could request adjustment? ... would avoid if possible though

So...I complained to HR who also agreed and sided with the manager. There was only so many excuses i could make to get out of the cellar. It got to a point the stock room tasks had seriously started to pile up and the manager would not allocate it to another employee and insisting on me doing it. So I signed off sick for work-related stress, It really was getting too much and i felt it was affecting store efficiency by me just being there.

after signing off, i made a formal complaint to HR and wrote to them saying I felt bullied and harassed and i felt the manager was intentionally being difficult. And for that reason the GP had signed me off for work-related stress.

The following day, almost as a reaction to my complaint the same manager sent me a letter inviting me to a disciplinary hearing, the reason for the disciplinary was serious insubordination, refusing to follow management instructions. Between sending me the notice of hearing and the date and time of hearing there was barely 36 hours. I asked for it to be postponed as I wanted my ducks in a row and i wanted time to prepare and get a further note from my Dr but he refused and said he was only required

to give me 24 hours notice and he’s given me above that. He went ahead with the hearing without me and then wrote me an email saying i’m facing a further disciplinary for misconduct for not turning up to the hearing without good reason. I’m speechless. Where do I stand now? I feel he will do his absolute best to get rid of me whilst I’m on maternity and I haven’t even had the chance to put my side forward! and now i’ll have this hanging over me all throughout my maternity leave 😢

Were you still signed off sick when he called the disciplinary? That's not on, if so. Even if not, he's on shaky ground doing this after getting a complaint from you.

Did you consult ACAS? Please do. It's just a phone call. They give great advice and that should help you relax while on maternity.

With HR in his pocket and boss seeming petty and vindictive, you'd be mad to try and deal with this on your own. He's obviously in the wrong. But that doesn't help you - you have to be strategic. Contact details for ACAS here:

www.acas.org.uk/contact

Sorry it's all been so stressful

pregnantthenscrewed.com/

Did you contact ACAS and Pregnant Then Screwed originally? Don’t try and handle this on your own. They want you to out via disciplinary.

yes I was signed off sick when he called the disciplinary, and yes it was pregnant the screwed who advised me not to go ahead with the the hearing if i wasn't prepared. ACAS gave the opposite advise they said I should go ahead so as to at least get my point across and if there was anything missing in-terms of evidence to submit it during the disciplinary appeal stage.

I went with the advice from pregnant and screwed as I was sure they would postpone the hearing but it totally threw me when they didn't.

Thanks for your advice guys, I feel a bit better now, i'll give pregnant then screwed another call tmrw morning and take it from there ❤️

There are threads on here about this very thing. You aren’t alone.
How long are you signed off sick?
is this a national chain where you could move stores?

No we're a very small independent store, With about 6 employees in total, hence i suppose the lack of support from 'HR' as 'HR' is a one-woman affair.

I'm off sick for another month and then i'm going straight onto maternity leave. I'm so bummed that I've been left in such a difficult financial situation too. I had hoped to work until the very end and save for the baby and the year ahead but that's all gone to pot. With me on SSP me and DH on as much overtime as he can get, we are just about managing to get our mortgage and bills out. I'll definitely be taking this further. I don't even know at this point if i'll have a job to go back to at the end of it.

Well, OP, definitely don’t do this yet. But something to keep in your back pocket is that if the worst comes to the worst and it looks like you are about to be let go, threat
en to name the shop here and hopefully elsewhere so we can boycott it. If you are let go, name it. And I feel sure many of us will.

I wish I had better advice for you. Take care.

It sounds as if they want to get you out (constructive dismissal) so they don't have to give you maternity pay. It may be that this is illegal but they might try it anyway in the hope that you will not contest it.
I'm sorry if that sounds pessimistic. If they do this, you might be supported by the union etc, and try to control your interaction with them, only address the issue at a certain time each day etc. It very hard that you have to think about this when you are pregnant.