Sorry this may be a large vent but if someone reads it and has any advice i would be so grateful
So, I am a mum of a 14 month old. I quit my job after mat leave as I was not in the right frame of mind to go back to work after 6 months (especially when little one was tongue-tied for 4 months of it), i feel like ive only just got my brain back (as much as a mum brain can).
DH works full time and earns a decent salary, enough for it to be essential i work anyway (yet). He is also recovering from long covid so has little to no energy and not really enjoying his job.
We are trying to buy a house so are currently living at his parents house rent free. We have been living at my parents during the pandamic and during my pregnancy and little ones birth.
DH was supportive of be being a stay at home mum at first, said he would rather me bring up our child and not pay so much for childcare, his parents agreed.
Latley my partner has been suggesting i go back to work part time. He also was very upset i was not cleaning the house as much as i was, or left things to do later. Says i could do so much while little one naps, and i told him she is a contact napper and its much harder work looking after a little one then it looks but its met with that i dont have to work comments and how "cush" a life i have at the moment. This was after my parents took me and little one to the beach for the day and i had no time to clean breakfast, and he decided he would work in the kitchen so it was messy for him.
I know he has been under lots of stress with his job and recovery, so i said he will see more of a change, i will make sure the house is looked after but to remember i am looking after a child and 4 adults worth of mess. I know he needs me to do this so he can work so i am not unhappy about this its just the added expectation i can possibly work from home and be the perfect house wife at the same time, and now he is suggesting childcare for a day a week so i can have a "day to myself" meaning work where at the end of the day i would of ernt maybe £20 with the childcare cost?
He is very sensitive at the moment so i dont know how to even approach a conversation with him without him comparing his hard work and hard troubles healing, I am currently a house wife stay at home mum looking after a toddler who has just learnt to crawl and nearly walk, i need to start sleep training because she only contact naps and sleeps, i am looking for houses to buy and i am planning our wedding, i am my sisters maid of honour, i feel like with this i dont play as much as i should with my little one and he thinks i can work part time at home plus i should have a hobby and learn a new language? Theres just so much pressure on me and he doesnt see it because he sees it as he has given me time to do things being a stay at home mum... i said i would see what my old work says i can only think of doing 8 hours a week minimum and it would have to be flexable .
Then theres the expectation to after all this to be a responsive wife.. i feel like im going to implode of all the stress there is put on me of expectations
I dont have any mum friends nearby either and i cant vent to anyone i know
Im sure there was more to my vent but my little one has just stole the house keys haha
Thanks in advance if you reply