Difficult direct report - or me?

[Ywnaged]

I have a chap in my team who has been with the company for over a decade. My contract ends at Xmas.

Our r’ship started off very friendly but I was warned by others that he was very boundary-d about working hours i.e. never works past 5pm etc. No problem, I have a lot of respect for people who manage their time and have families - like me!

In the past six months he’s taken a load of sick days both for him and his youngest child. All illnesses are unrelated fwiw but it does appear like him being checked out. We are fully remote so it’s not like we’re all having to commute to an office. This combined with a bit of a lacustre attitude has given me pause.

Following a large project going wrong whilst he was on another sick day, I had to pull him up - nicely - on what could have gone better. I’m now getting really clipped and rude emails in response to my questions about his other projects. I’ve given this person plenty of chances to ask for support when 1on1 and always get the same response ‘I’m fine. Everything’s ok’. I am forever asking about him on a personal level to gain some warmth but get the same stock responses.

Today I find out he’s raised a grievance against me! My boss is firmly on my side and has told me to rise above it/that it’s definitely on my direct report but this has really shaken me.

Question is, with 5 months left, what do I do? Confront? Ignore? Continue to play nice? Roll out our policy?

Grateful for the wisdom of mumsnetters.

Hmm I'm a bit of a cynical person so before commencing any formal performance management of him I would want to be very, very sure that was the path your manager and the general senior leaders really want to go down, because clearly he's a 'know his rights' type not afraid of a grievance and it could all end up very messy. Clearly he was allowed to go on as he was for 10 years before you got there and that now makes changing his behaviour very difficult and it's also kind of understandable that if you're the only one who's ever had an issue with him (which will be his perception even if others have had problems and just not tackled it) he will take it as a personal slight. So if it was me I'd want assurances that if I start something off someone will definitely pick it up when you leave (or otherwise it will just be wasted effort and a whole lot of upset for nothing) and that they won't just throw you under the bus at the first sign of trouble which is sadly very easy to do with contractors. If I wasn't hearing the right noises (and not just oh yes you're right he's useless, it's one thing to say that and another to commit to tackling it!) I would take the path of least resistance, if that's avoiding giving him work you don't trust him to complete or being very measured in your feedback (I wouldn't lie and say everything's great but nor would I be venturing any opinions I couldn't absolutely back up with facts/evidence) then so be it, it's far from the 'right' way to manage but if you don't have the back up and are only there for 5 months then what can you do? Low level rudeness/curtness/lack of warmth I would simply ignore, any unacceptable language or behaviour he would be pulled firmly up there and then, and I'd be clear when and how he has to report progress on work to me (and stick to it, so if I ask for a weekly update that's what I get) but then avoid pestering him with questions or micromanaging in the meantime, seems he resents too much 'interference' .

Is it only you and him in the team or do you have other direct reports? Is his work/absence from work affecting anyone else other than you?

Thanks for this thoughtful response. I’ve actually posted the same thread in the relationships board for traffic but I will answer your qus here.

i think the path of least resistance is the best way to proceed as I am not confident that there is strong enough infrastructure at my company to support me with pursuing this. Think: weird policies, non-existent processes, inconsistent HR advice depending on who you talk to! Plus the person I’m covering for will return after Xmas and I don’t know the extent of their relationship, only that they were fairly friendly.

slight issue being is that there is only one other person in the team. They start in September.

so when things fall down I have no one else to defer to! It’s on me. If I ask for an update or for him to follow process I get a curt or clipped response.

argh

What were the points you pulled him up on for what could have gone better?

As an aside I have seen people put in really petty grievances and complaints which were brushed under the carpet. They sound like your report, just a bit too full of themselves to handle not so positive feedback. In one case it was about him turning up 20 mins late to a meeting which led to the person been late raising a HR complaint against the person complaining about the lateness.

@Isittimef0rbedyet they have experience of a technical process. This process should have been set up by 16th may ready to go. But very straightforward aspects weren’t done so I had to scramble to do them. The best example I can give without being too outing is that imagine they were delivering letters en masse and had forgotten to address the envelopes. I know that’s basic but trying to be careful!

HR bod here. This is not too uncommon unfortunately. I'd advise to let the grievance be heard and his performance be managed by another manager assuming the grievance relates to you not his role remit.

If the grievance is found to has no legs you can be reinstated to manage him.

Common diversion tactic. If you have support from above, and get it in writing, you will likely be ok

@Metabigot thank you. Which is the common bit in your experience?

Bullies claim bullying is common.

The raising of a grievance when challenged.

Attack is the best form of defence for some people. The trick is not to let them manipulate you into leaving them alone/ unchallenged. You need support from above though.

We see this all the time in HR.