I interviewed for a local tech company and later that week I received a phone call to say they where offering me the job and would it be possible for me to start on X date. I said yes, I'm sure they mentioned about being in touch for reference details so I waited over a week for an email to arrive from HR but nothing came. I sent an email to the HR email I found on their website first one asking if the verbal offer would be followed by a written confirmation, then when I had no response later in the week I provided my references by email.
I still had no reply so I didn't hand in my notice at work and the given start date passed. As I didn't show up on the proposed date I received an email asking about why I had no showed. I checked my spam folder and there my 2 emails had been returned as undeliverable. I now feel stupid as it looks like they just gave me the start date and I didn't bother to turn up. I apologized and said I'd sent the emails, and was reluctant to give my notice in without a confirmed offer knowing they where happy with my references. They are still interested as I asked whether they need my reference details and they have asked me to provide them.
Do I swallow my pride and reorganise my start date, not knowing if I will receive any unpleasantness for not turning up on my first day... Or was I right to expect a confirmed offer after providing references?. I'd hate to leave my current job, then loose this job over poor references. They have asked for 3. My current job will come back as ok, but before this I was a sahm so my other references are over 3 years old. I feel very embarrassed like I was given a date to come in but I didn't bother.