Struggling with presenting pressure in new job

[ImplementingTheDennisSystem]

Hi all. I'd like some advice and thoughts on a minor work issue that I'm having please.
I started a new role in December. It's hybrid and, because of the covid restrictions, I've only been properly in the office since Feb.
Because of Covid restrictions, I've not been in formal meetings and so on since 2019 and I'm working through some anxiety about the whole thing - just the formality and claustrophobia of meetings and so on. I'll get there and it's getting easier all the time.
For extra context, I had the most appalling onboarding into this new job that i could posdibly imagine. No handover, no handover notes, I wasn't given things like log in details to portals that I need to use regularly and so on. They are also short staffed and I've been dropped straight into an intense workload and am currently doing 2 full time roles while I try to recruit someone to support me.
Anyway, they seem quite old school and seem to love physical presentations (they didnt allude to this in the interview). I've always been extremely anxious about presenting and have just gone on a course that I paid for myself to try to help myself. I'm also going to Toastmasters this week.
But my work wants me to give a presentation to 35 partners (law firm) in the next month or so, and I feel I can't do it because:

• my poor and chaotic onboarding means I don't yet fully understand the politics and nuances enough to deliver the sensitive messaging (about financials and the performance of certain teams and individuals) that will be expected of me.
• I still haven't even led a large meeting yet in my new environment and want some time to do some of that before building up to doing this presentation.

I'm only manager grade FYI, not head of a team or anything. And my manager and team mates are SO lovely. I just want to know how this sounds to you? If I casually explain my situation to my manager, without making a big thing of it, would it sound acceptable? For further context they have been really impressed with me in all areas so far (so I feel like this is my only 'issue'). Thanks in advance for your input.

I would expect realistically you will be offered support but not a pass on this.

GP can also prescribe beta blockers to help.

It doesn't sound like something you're going to be able to get out of. If they're lovely they might support you in it but you're going to have to think about what to ask them to help you with of you do, indeed, have to do it.

If there are sensitive messages, it sounds like you're going to have to do some stakeholder management - sharing and socialising key messages to understand perspectives/present them sensitively etc.

Maybe ask your boss for a dry run a few days before so that you can incorporate feedback?

Practice until it just comes out of your month automatically - they obviously have lots of confidence in your ability to do this, so try to take comfort and confidence from that (and knowing your stuff backwards).

What I do for any possibly sensitive topic presentations is I send my boss bullets of the key messages I'll be delivering and ask for him to confirm he's happy before I start writing it up.

Agree with the other responses. They might also see this as a good opportunity for you - to stretch a bit outside your comfort zone and get good visibility with other senior people. And it might not feel like it, but it could be brilliant for you. Try to get as much support as you can with your prep - see if someone you trust will let you do a dry run with them as the audience; share your slides for feedback with trusted colleagues etc. Ask someone to share slides from previous similar presentations so you get a sense of the style, what works.