I'm a line manager of 13 people and on the whole have a great, well-rounded and positive team and some fantastic working relationships.
A new team member joined recently and their manner of communicating with me is really starting to get me down, particularly via email.
Verbal conversations happen and feel like they go well, then when referred to later, it's suggested that's not what was said or not how the conversation went and it's back to square one. Their performance is the worst I've seen and they're doing very little to focus on what improvements they need to make, despite extensive and ongoing support being in place.
Instead everything gets turned back round on me or something else, anything but ownership by the employee.
I recently made them aware that performance management would be addressed in a formal manner and they're now telling me my decision to make them aware and how I did that (followed our company policy/procedure) was inappropriate, inconsiderate and now their stance is they're disappointed with me. Not disappointed with the process or situation they're finding themselves in, but with me. No specifics around my role, which feels very personal rather than professional.
This same person has communicated in this way since they were made aware they weren't meeting requirements of the role.
I previously pulled them up during Verbal communication where I highlighted I felt they were verbally attacking me for following a process, which was responded to with an apology and I didn't mean to offend you babe.
They now saying I'm causing them stress which is impacting their abilty to carry out their caring responsibility outside of work.
I'm responding as politely and professionally as possible, with HR guidance to ensure I'm carrying out my role effectively, but this is really starting to get me down as it feels its becoming a personal attack, but I also know the longer it goes on, the harder I'm going to find it to cope.
Any similar experiences or suggestions of how to raise the comms issue without it just being another issue they have with me?
I recently completed 360 feedback and whilst this person didn't respond, the majority of my team did with really positive feedback all round.
One worn out people manager 