Hate New Job!

[over2021]

I feel too embarrassed to tell anyone in real life but need some unbiased advice! I changed a few details for the sake of anonymity but nothing important!

Left role I'd been in for 11 years for new job that I started about a month ago. I worked out a long notice period so it wasn't a rash decision. I've taken a decent pay increase on paper- from £63k to £75k.

I absolutely hate my new job. The journey is taking a long time- I had tried it a few times and had been checking sat back every morning but the announcement to go back to the office means the journey time is now approx 1hr 35 minutes each way as opposed to the hour I anticipated meaning DD (reception) has to start breakfast club at 7am and isn't picked up until after DH finishes work at 5. I am spending the payrise on travel and childcare.

The job itself is relentless and I feel like I may be in a position to be scapegoated for some quite significant past failings in months to come.

My dilemma is that I can't afford to just quit but I'm not sure how to approach agencies after only being in the role for a month. I am in a senior role (more senior than pay would suggest but that's the sector I work in!) and leaving after a short time would definitely affect my reputation. I couldn't face going back to old employer cap in hand though have no doubt they'd take me back. I also took one of my more junior staff with me to the new role so I feel I have a responsibility to him to stay

I'm genuinely torn between "just give it more time" to crying about the thought of having to get up and go to work tomorrow.

I've been here. Thankfully my last job were happy to take me back (which I don't recommend either - I lost a lot of power this way). But I always put my mental health amongst all else so would quit. You can still leave with £75k as your market rate and spend some time looking at your next, more local role.

I feel for you. Leaving aside the actual job issues, that's a hell of a commute. The pay difference will also be narrowed by tax, so it's what, 7K extra?

You've got a ready-made excuse with childcare and unexpectedly long commute (with a reason that makes sense to everyone ie return to office impacting on traffic), so I'd just go ahead and get your old job back, and be clear that this is the reason (even if it's not the whole reason). I don't see why that would affect your reputation; it wouldn't in my area - we'd just be delighted to have a good colleague back. Life happens, not everything is predictable.

Don't worry about your junior, I'm sure he can look after himself. I bet he'd not give you a second thought if he found a job that suited him better.

Agree with @BorderCollieMum. 1 month in is in many ways better than 3 -6 months in, you can easily leave a month gap on a CV, or otherwise you can be open and say that unfortunately it didn't align with what was advertised.

To be honest, after 11 years in your last job, this new job was always going to be tough. It's a huge change. I think you need to stick it out and take a view in 6-12 months if you still feel the same way. Often it can take 12 months to settle in to a new job, especially when it's a more senior role.

But in the meantime, make sure you've covering your arse. Past failings from before you joined are exactly that. PAST failings. Don't let yourself be used as a fall guy.

@over2021 hello! Just wondering how you've got on? I'm in a very similar position. Left a job that I enjoyed for a job with 10k more salary, which is 30 mins down the road which did appeal to me too. The reality is the bonus isn't as big, there isn't a car allowance so actually the salary is comparable, but the job itself is awful. My old job I was remote based but travelled the country, which at this point I'd prefer. The culture is terrible, it's politics galore and everyone hates their jobs. I've inherited a huge mess to sort out, which was never implied at any interview level. My induction has been entirely lacking and it's basically been expected that I come in, pick it all up and sort it out, in a place full of people that hate it there. Alot have advised me to leave, a new member of staff in another department left after 1 day, but because I am in a senior position I've felt obliged to stay. Its the only thing I currently think about, all the way up to the moment I go to sleep, and then I wake up thinking about it all. I was already in contact with an agency, I could literally call the agency guy tomorrow and get a get out role doing that for now, and then spend some time trying to find another role, but it all just feels so.... awkward? And I feel like I'm letting down people there that have relied on me to turn up and fix it? Help! Just wondering if you solved your one? Thanks x

I haven't resolved it unfortunately. The job itself has become a little easier as I've fixed some major issues but the travel is still exhausting. I am looking for other roles now but have found most in my field have reduced salaries due to remote working- I'd rather earn more and go to work every day to be honest; especially with rising energy costs at home.

I had a probation review last week and got 1's across the board which makes it even more difficult because I now feel I'd be leaving them in the lurch if/when I do go!

In my mind I I'm thinking that a year is a fair period of time for both sides so I'm holding out another 8 months if nothing special comes up before hand!

I lasted 10 months in a job that i had a sinking realisation in my first day was not going to be what i had thought. I really did try to give it a go but looking back, i should have started looking for something else immediately. If anyone ever asks why i stayed a short period of time, i just say it wasn't the job for me and as i have a work history showing long periods at other jobs, it has never affected me finding work.

If the travel time is a major issue can you ask to work a hybrid pattern. Home Monday & Friday, office Tuesday to Thursday for example?

@over21 Ah I'm glad it's got a little easier, but it still sounds like you aren't enjoying yourself! I just don't know if I can be bothered to put myself through a year of pain and feel like I want to get out before I am expected to make all these changes and they settle into me being their manager. I regret taking this job so much, but it really wasn't made clear quite how much of a mess it's in.

@lemonlemon88 Yeah, I'm thinking I can just not even put this on my CV if I manage to get out, it's just the awkwardness of leaving so soon that's making me feel physically sick. So torn over what to do, but I've had this sinking doubt over this role since my first week, and it feels like more than just new job jitters. I think my mind is made up and I'm going to have to just bite the bullet and leave but it's making me so anxious! Hate feeling like I've let people down and I don't think my manager is going to take this on the chin somehow.