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Original poster

I need to resign today and I'm a coward

33 replies

VeganAvoToast · 16/02/2022 12:02

I started a role with local government mid January. I've been offered a role at a university in the field I have a qualification in and used to work in, and I pays more.

My current job is much much more payroll/pension heavy than I was told instead of HR, I knew quite quickly it wasn't for me. But it's permanently working from home and I'm a single parent so I felt I ought to take it at the time.

Anyway, I need to let current post know today. New offer wants me to start on the 28 February. A colleague I'm currently working beside described a teacher as "disgusting" for leaving after 6 months due to the admin that entails. I'm leaving after 5 weeks. I'm so worried about the reception I'll get and causing more admin work for the small team.

How do I put on my big girl pants?

OP posts:
MoanyMo · 16/02/2022 12:04

You won't be there for the fall out. You need to put yourself first.

SpeckledlyHen · 16/02/2022 12:07

Just do it. Sometimes things don't work out and you have to think of you rather than them. They would have no problem getting rid of you if they felt you were non performing and we in a probationary period.

I too started a job last year, I knew within a few weeks it was not for me, really nice company and people but I was bored and always would be. I let them know quite quickly after 3 mths and before I went through probationary pass.

This is what HR do quite literally, manage starters and leavers so if it isn't you generating that admin it will be someone else. Ignore the silly colleague and her comments.

Original poster
VeganAvoToast · 16/02/2022 12:13

Yes I just need to do it. I keep opening Teams to call LM then not doing it. Payroll has already run so it'll be even more hassle. But then quite a few people seem to leave lG posts without giving notice and then don't contact us to inform us they've been overpaid...why am I so bloody worried!

I had an incident happen at the weekend and god I need a break.

OP posts:
Foolsrule · 16/02/2022 12:22

Remember no one can ‘tell you off’ for leaving. You’ll be better off elsewhere and you owe these people nothing!

HollowTalk · 16/02/2022 12:24

If they say anything, I would say, "If the job was as it was described to me at interview, I wouldn't be leaving..."

SpeckledlyHen · 16/02/2022 12:36

Stop procrastinating and just do it, you will feel so much better once it's done.

CoverYourselfInChocolateGlory · 16/02/2022 12:38

Presumably you're still within your probationary period. That's what this time is for - for you, as well as the company to decide. If they are even vaguely professional then they'll be decent about it, if not, then even better that you're leaving! Go for it!

MayMorris · 16/02/2022 12:41

I’d just say sorry, the role is not as I thought it was going to be, and not the best fit for my skills.
That’s it. Don’t burn any bridges.
Why not send it in an email as letter of resignation and send to your manager saying you’re available to chat about it.
You don’t have to ender resignation in person (although it’s better if you have a longer relationship with boss and company). You do have to tender in writing asap anyway,

FusionChefGeoff · 16/02/2022 12:41

Can you message LM to put time in for call so you can't back out?!

Original poster
VeganAvoToast · 16/02/2022 12:43

I've read through my contract and no mention of probationary period, which Is unusual.

I'm a grown woman, I know I'm being ridiculous...I just keep thinking of the costs of hiring me and setting me up for home working, and the continued training they are doing (well, the one colleague who described the teacher as disgusting)

OP posts:
Forgothowmuchlhatehomeschoolin · 16/02/2022 12:49

I can understand you feeling worried op but you will feel so much better when it is done.
Tell them you applied for both roles at the same time and this one has only just come back to you.
Employers never know a new recruit will get on so it is always a possibility they will leave.
Rip that plaster off!!

bedheadedzombie · 16/02/2022 12:51

Do it now. You'll feel better in ten minutes. All this worrying is worse than the actual call.

Original poster
VeganAvoToast · 16/02/2022 12:52

I've emailed LM and asked for a call for today Blush

OP posts:
Youngatheart00 · 16/02/2022 12:53

You are just a commodity to them - once piece of evidence of that is that the job you’re doing is not as described. You’re a bum in a seat doing what they ask you to do. You own your career and you owe them nothing other than your contractual notice.

Good luck OP! It’ll feel much better when it’s done!

mistermagpie · 16/02/2022 12:54

If you're working from home you'll never actually see any of these people again anyway, don't feel bad about it, just tell them
this job isn't for you and you have found a more suitable opportunity.

Good luck!

Duracellbunnywannabe · 16/02/2022 12:55

Haven’t you posted about this before?

JauntyJinty · 16/02/2022 13:07

What are they going to do, sack you?!

You'll feel so relived this afternoon once it's been done :)

DamnUserName21 · 16/02/2022 13:09

As PP have said--you owe them nothing. The first few months of a new job are to see if both parties like it and are fit for the role, IMO.
Take the better job.

gettingolderandgrumpy · 16/02/2022 13:11

You need to learn not to care what people think . I personally wouldn’t be bothered if you hand your notice in but others are arses and may be but not your problem if they want to be upset over it . Hand notice in and don’t give it a 2nd thought.

PostThenGhost · 16/02/2022 13:13

Will you be able to start your new job in just 12 days? Do you not have to give more notice? Curious because my notice period is far longer than I’d like and I’d love to know if there is a way round it.

Congratulations on your new job!

Original poster
VeganAvoToast · 16/02/2022 13:15

Yes I would say that the last few months my confidence has plummeted and I am unable to make any decisions about anything. I feel so overwhelmed.

I would love to stop caring so much about what other people think and how I think I'll look and start caring far more about myself.

OP posts:
Original poster
VeganAvoToast · 16/02/2022 13:18

Normally probation is 3 month period after starting. In that time its usually 1 to 2 weeks notice (depending on seniority of post). So @PostThenGhost it may be because your role is senior ?

My current post hasn't outlined a probationary period in contract, I should give a month. However, legally speaking I think it is 1 week notice prior to 3 months in post.

My current post My tell me to work full notice period, but because they are training me, it won't be beneficial for that to continue when I'm leaving anyway

OP posts:
godmum56 · 16/02/2022 13:22

JFDI and then celebrate

CheesyWeez · 16/02/2022 13:24

In your request you can ask LM for a callback as you are resigning, that way they already know what you will be saying to them.

The plaster is ripped off already if you do that.

The post wasn't as described OP, so you can mention that.

It hasn't worked out this time, that happens.

I'm sorry you had an upsetting incident at the weekend you could also mention that if it wasn't an expected part of the role.

Don't worry about the teacher thing, everyone is allowed to change their minds for no reason and in this case the job is not as expected / described ( which was probably the case for the teacher also).

HumousWhereTheHeartIs · 16/02/2022 13:44

You'll feel better soon, OP, once you have told them. A teacher leaving could have quite an impact so maybe your colleague's view was specific to that role. My daughter's classroom assistant left mid way through the academic year and she was devastated.

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