Recovering from burnout

[PermanentTemporary]

After a truly disastrous day I'm self diagnosing with burnout. In the past I've always been a terribly slow learner and erratic in performance (from really good to really not very good) but saved by a good work ethic, being a team player, and visibly keen to learn and improve. I've worked in my NHS job for ten years, always loved it.

I've had six months of hugely increased stress because my mum had a kind of stroke. She was declining before that and I was very worried, but her becoming ill, being in the hospital that I work at, going into a nursing home that couldn't cope, followed by a nursing home that can cope but is almost an hour away, plus managing her affairs and selling/clearing her flat - I'm worn out. Somewhere in all this is my ds who is in his last year of school. And it's 4 years since we lost his dad, my dh. And 2 years since my dad died.

Right now I'm incredibly rude to everyone including team mates, am doing the minimum and although I'm still fascinated by the patients and the theory, I don't want to make anyone do anything uncomfortable. I'm giving up on patients before they have given up because trying to improve things will involve persuading them to do uncomfortable things and I don't want to do it. But it's the rudeness and short temper that is so new. I don't want to be like this. What can I do?

Since you are NHS you get yourself signed off with stress. You take a bit of time, and then go back when things are better.

I agree with PP, I think you should get signed off for a bit.

It sounds like you've had a really hard time recently and I hope things get better for you soon

Oh dear

Im not sure i can do that. But maybe I do need to.

What if I were self employed?? Is there anything I can do? There's only 2 of us covering 19 wards and I can't bear the idea of leaving my colleague stranded.

It sounds like you are under unbearable pressure and you need to get signed off for a bit.

If (god forbid) you dropped dead tomorrow the trust would have to organise someone to cover and your colleagues would have to cope. Running yourself into the ground will not help anyone. If you get signed off with stress perhaps the trust will have to look at safe staffing levels and sustainable caseloads. We can but dream.

I know I'm only a body, I'm not irreplaceable, I'm pretty average in performance. But there's such a gap always between someone going off and a replacement. What if I go off, they don't find anyone and I come back to find the work is the same but my colleague goes sick?

To sit in front of a GP of all people and say I'm under unbearable stress... argh.

You've said you are being incredibly rude to your team mates and you are not challenging your patients when you should be. You need to be signed off with stress before you break. Go and see your Gp and be honest.

Right I will go to the GP, anyway. They can help me, whatever we decide. Thanks x

It’s hard to go to the doctor and say you can’t cope anymore. I know because in January I had to do it.

But it’s vital. I only had three weeks off, but the difference was night and day. Three weeks of not having to think, at all, about work. Three weeks to just be calm and relax, get out in the sunshine and get enough sleep.

You may need more than three weeks (a friend of mine just had to go off for two months) and you should take it! An engine can’t run when the fuel is gone.

It would be harder is f you were self employed due to the money aspect. It would still be necessary though.

But you’re NHS so you should have good sickness benefits. It’s a perk of your employer that makes up for the relatively low pay - so use it! :)

I'm assuming you're a registered health professional OP.... What does your professional code of conduct say about how you're supposed to interact with colleagues and patients, or about recognising the impact of your health on your performance?

Take good care