Comments about length of maternity leave

[Greenleaves20]

I’d planned to take a year of maternity leave with my second baby and I’m about 8 months into it. My father in-law, who is retired from the health service, keeps on making snide comments about the amount of time I’m having off work and the fact I’ll be part time when I’m back. I work in the NHS too and in his day the hours were much longer etc and having time off would be unheard of. He rolls his eyes and says that this is the problem with the NHS, that people are working part time and on maternity leave etc. He feels I should have gone back at 6 months. I want time with my baby and little boy and I’m breastfeeding but I’m now questioning if this is completely selfish and I should just get back to work ASAP! I feel like I have no strong arguments as to why I’m on maternity leave at all! Losing the plot here, help!

I regret going back so early with my first when he was 7 months, i only went back 2/3 days a week, i also felt like my pump breaks were a pain to others and i would try move my pump times to quiter times in the day resulting in me beeing uncomftable. I felt so gulty knowing that i could be still on maternity at home with my baby, especially when it hit his first birthday month as it felt like i had been back to work for such a long time when i could have been just returning if i took the year.

Im currently pregnant with my seccond and have already told work i plan to take a year maternity this time

I would not tolerate this discussion. What is your husband or partner saying to him when he is criticising your choices?

I'd be interested to know what your FIL's family set up was like, did his wife work?

This would piss me off so much! Well done for staying civil.. I’m not sure I’d be able to!! Entirely your choice. Tell him you don’t want to hear his views on it and change the subject. He sounds rude and I wonder if you were a bloke taking time off for something whether he would say the same bullshit. What does he want you to do? Ask him if he’s prepared to provide childcare from 6 months? Sorry but he sounds like an absolute twat and I’d expect my DH to end this convo. Xo