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Original poster

Should I quit? 5 months in new company /role

12 replies

Heligan77 · 28/12/2021 12:15

Hi
I moved to a tech company late last year. No idea why they hired me but the job is certainly well above my level
I have imposter syndrome every day and I am struggling

My manager is based in America and is a total visionary He just is off the scale...
I am drowning... most of the people I work with are in America too so there is a huge time difference issue also which is not ideal

I was 15 years with my last company so its a huge adjustment for me to move new company and totally different sector. Also I have little self confidence and I have been sold as an expert which I ain't but what can i do

Do I give up or try stick it out? The thought of giving up fills me with as much anxiety as sticking it out ...on the positive side its an amazing company and amazing opportunity

I'm 46 and feel peri menopause there too which isn't helping

Anyone any words of wisdom?

OP posts:

TellMeItsPossible · 28/12/2021 12:19

Are you able to meet your deadlines and hit your targets? Are you coping with the amount of work? What is it specifically you are struggling with, apart from the time zone issue (which is tricky, admittedly!)?

I would say that at 5 months in you probably barely are at the head above water stage, most jobs it takes about a year to get established. So feeling this way is normal, I think.

Marzipano · 28/12/2021 13:42

Don't quit. And don't think you need to be brilliant at everything straight away. As long as there's something you can add, you're being valuable.

MrsCocochannel · 28/12/2021 20:09

Yeh id wait a while, I once was like you and age 46 in a very technical job way out of my comfort zone. After 6 mths to a year turned out to be the best job ever.

I left that job for a new job and quit after 8 weeks as I knew I hated the place and it wasn't just the discomfort of a new a new job which I suspect is what you have. Give it time you'll be fine.

Dontlookdownmuch · 28/12/2021 20:53

My sister was recruited to a position she felt uncomfortable with - I'd have said she was confident and good at her job - she moved sector and really struggled - she asked for help but they fobbed her off and for her not being able to make a difference and do a good job was crushing. She did not have financial reasons to work - they have a pension and several houses and she decided life was too short to waste feeling stressed and ineffective and she left last week with nothing to go to and no regrets and lots of opportunities in the current job market - go find something you love!

Marzipano · 28/12/2021 21:07

lots of opportunities in the current job market

This is also true! It's very much a job-seekers' market right now, especially in tech.

Original poster

Heligan77 · 28/12/2021 22:46

Thank you all for taking the time to respond. I really appreciate it.

I just don't know if its the new company , the department/team or me....

I dont know how I get over my fear...they are expecting me to reimagine a lot of stuff and I just don't think I can ..

I'm a mess....

OP posts:

daisychain01 · 29/12/2021 04:53

they are expecting me to reimagine a lot of stuff and I just don't think I can ...

Can you get them to clarify exactly what they need you to do, rather than nebulous words that are too vague to do anything with. "Reimagine" - is that your word or theirs? Do they mean they need you to redesign a process or something?

Before you throw in the towel, challenge them to help you understand their expectations better. Ask them to work with you to set SMART objectives so you know what you're expected to delivery (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, Timebound).

If they can't articulate your deliverables in these terms then I'd be surprised as it's a very well recognised approach to Objectives.

There's no point him/her being a Visionary if they cannot articulate how to reach their vision, through Goals and Objectives.

Totalwasteofpaper · 29/12/2021 05:15

If you are at meta/Google/similar etc stick it out. It gets better - honestly.
Focus on building out your xfn network - devote calendar time to it.
It's a big adjustment moving into tech I felt like I drowning slightly in the first year...this is Incredibly common. Cannot stress enough what a non unique experience you are having (no offence )

Tiktok or other rapidgrowth Co. - hang on and give it a year at least to let some shares vest and if you aren't doing a 996 be super happy! They are growing super fast so are tail chasing to some degree the biz knows this and that is reflected in goals / targets

Amazon - dont quit but do start looking. It's the Ryanair of tech world...

Totalwasteofpaper · 29/12/2021 05:17

Should add at tech it isn't about doing a lot of the work yourself ie you reimagine everything... it's about getting the right people in the room.

You build and create through xfn and consensus.

BootsScootsAndToots · 29/12/2021 05:24

I was going to start a thread saying something very similar @Heligan77

I was 10 years with my previous (American company) but had a manager who was fantastic and based in the UK. I moved home and tried to find a similar company and 4 months into this role now feel like I might resign when I finally get to speak to my manager sometime in January.

There is 9 hours time difference and if I want to get anything done I really need to be available from 6 pm to 10 pm. I've got youngish DC and this sux.

I have been totally left on my own during this period while others are taking leave, I've had to work on my day off, putting in 10/12 hour days the other days.

I've also been given the title of expert when my CV (and I reiterated it during my interviews!) says I'm not an expert and haven't worked in this area for 15+ years.

My dh thinks if I'm going to quit (and is supportive if that's what I want to do) why can't I just think fuck it, and not take the role so seriously, not let it stress me.

But I hate the thought of people saying I'm shit at my job, and if I don't go above and beyond everytime, that's exactly how it will seem.

Original poster

Heligan77 · 29/12/2021 11:25

@BootsScootsAndToots I swear we are v similar. My DH tells me to jack it in if I want but I just can't

The time difference (8 hours) is the worst for sure I feel I'm spending zero time with my kids.. everyone comes online at 5pm and its friggin impossible to do the job unless working late but I didnt sign up to US hours ... I conside maybe working till 9pm Tues and Wednesday but then I know people will be planning group meetings and some won't be available those days so ends up 7pm Monday or 8pm.thursday Just a total stress...

The company is one of the super big tech ones for sure. Not amazon though...

OP posts:

BootsScootsAndToots · 04/01/2022 11:00

Just checking in @Heligan77

My first day back for 2022 and I took my last call for the day at 8 pm 😖

I had such high hopes for this role, could even deal with the fact to do absolutely everything I have to spend at least an hour on Google, contact local employees and then just hope for the best. But the incredibly long hours I think are going to do me in.

We were planning to move house and I've just told dh I want to wait 6 months to see how this job goes. I don't want to take on a big mortgage making me feel tied to this job...

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