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Original poster

Private nursery insensitive boss..maybe im having a rant

15 replies

Insensitiveboss · 10/12/2021 21:20

My middle child took too many tablets nearly 2 weeks ago. She was going through a bad time that we weren't aware of but now we do as she opened up to us in her dairy after she came out of the hosp.

My daughter spent 4 days in hospital on a few of treatment drips, came home and went straight to school the next day to return back to normality as quick as poss.

Me and my husband not slept for a whole week as we were devastated. I took 5 days off work altogether. (I'm still shattered now). My daughter is getting help from Cahms and from us too.

The 2nd day when i was back in work, the owner gave me a 1st warning cos of too many days off sick as I took 3 days off at the beginning of that month (Nov) with a bad cold, headache and sore throat. (Total 8 days). If im off again before March next year then I'll get a 2nd warning...

Then the owner asked if theres anything that they can do to help? I thought 'Wow....I've spent 4 days in hosp with my daughter cos she took tablets and you've thrown that in my face...its not like i was in bed sick!!'

I just said No.

Im just feeling pissed off with them.

Ive been told all private nurseries are like that. 😤😤😤

Please tell me thats not true??

OP posts:
NotTheGrinchAgain · 10/12/2021 21:44

I'm so sorry about your DD, that sounds very hard on your whole family and I hope you get good help (and quickly) from cahms

Just an idea - if you have worked for your employer over 1 year you are entitled to 4 weeks parental leave each year, why not ask for the week to be reclassified that way, since you weren't sick (although the shock of it probably felt like you were)? Parentsl leave isnt paid but it doesn't go on your record as sick leave.

Also you can then tell your manager they can help by being flexible about further parental leave to help support your DD.

Original poster
Insensitiveboss · 10/12/2021 21:54

I've only started in September this year. It just wasn't nice for the owner to do that, even though I'm holding it in in work as I've not told any of the staff exactly what has happened.

OP posts:
Original poster
Insensitiveboss · 10/12/2021 21:54

But thanks anyway

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Danikm151 · 10/12/2021 22:15

This would be compassionate leave in my opinion not sick leave,

Original poster
Insensitiveboss · 10/12/2021 22:18

I did check up on the 'compassionate leave' but its up to the Nursery to have that policy or not 😤😤

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Original poster
Insensitiveboss · 11/12/2021 07:29

Well i think it should have a compassionate leave policy at every single private nurseries. As its not fair.

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3teens2cats · 11/12/2021 07:38

Agree the recent absence should be treated as compassionate and not impact the sickness record. That aside your total absence percentage will be what has triggered them to rather clumsily instigate the absence policy. Does the nursery have a problem with staff absence in general i wonder?

Tumbleweed101 · 11/12/2021 08:57

My private nursery is a close team and our owner would have supported a staff member in this situation every step of the way. Absence wouldn’t have been mentioned in this situation, so I guess we do offer compassionate leave.

OpalOwl · 11/12/2021 09:21

My team are all close and my manager would genuinely want to help. However, the lovely robotic algorithms of head office would mean she would be forced to do the same.

Skyll · 11/12/2021 09:22

It’s possibly just the way it has to be handled through their policy.

Have you told your boss exactly what happened?

LethargicActress · 11/12/2021 09:28

If you haven’t told your boss exactly what happened, then you can’t be surprised that they aren’t giving you a fair reaction.

Two periods of sick leave totalling 8 days, when you’ve only been there since September, is a lot. Most workplaces would say something about that. They asked if they could do anything to help, obviously they can’t, but without the truth they don’t know that. I think considering the traumatic time you’ve just had, it’s understandable that you are over reacting.

Original poster
Insensitiveboss · 11/12/2021 10:05

Yes, they know exactly what happened to my daughter from the beginning to the end as i told them the updates every day (cos they wanted to know if i was coming into work or they need to get cover 🙄, which fair enough).

I expected no pay as i wasnt there to work but to put that on my sickness record is shit.

Im just praying she doesnt do it again within the 3 months. She's 13 years old. 😪😪

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Original poster
Insensitiveboss · 11/12/2021 10:06

Ive told the Owner and the Manager what happened but not my work colleagues.

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insancerre · 11/12/2021 11:15

Some workplaces do just see their staff as numbers and don’t get involved on a personal level
Saying that, it’s hard to manage absence and maintain ratios to be legally compliant
Maybe working in a nursery isn’t for you if you are likely to have frequent absences

Original poster
Insensitiveboss · 11/12/2021 13:55

Yes i think that what it is. We're numbers to them.

Its not much i can do as ive been working in nurseries in the past few years but this is the most ive been off sick in a very short time.

Thank you everyone for your advices and letting me release my steam out!! 😊

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