OK, so I haven't worked 9-5, Mon-Fri since 1994...

[emsiewill]

...and at that point I didn't have kids. I just can't remember how "life" works when you work full time...

How do you go to the dentist? Deal with household admin? (eg call BT and wait on the phone for hours) Keep on top of washing / ironing? Get your ears syringed? And a million other things that I can't think of off the top of my head...

I currently work 5 days, but am home by 4 every day. After Christmas I am starting a job where I won't be home much before 6:30 every day (gulp).

I am really nervous about how I'm going to cope - and how the family will be affected.

All hints and tips and words of encouragement gladly received.

You buy in help. Or else you spend every last waking minute working - either paid work or unpaid chores.

Well I do already have a cleaner, so I am lucky in that respect.

You haven't really reassured me, though.

you end up working around the clock. it helps if you like your job

i only work 3 days per week, and even that is flippin difficult to organise life's admin around (esp as am currently heavily pregnant with ds2 and having whole house renovated...). i have a cleaning lady twice a week for a couple of hours which helps massively. i invite son's friends over after school so that they can play while i do an hour of washing/cleaning/cooking (and likewise invites are reciprocated). i have other working mum friends and we pitch in together to help each other out if one of us is around to let in deliveries/plumbers at each other's houses. but fundamentally, i am 2 years overdue for dentist appointment, my hair gets cut once every 6 months instead of every 2, and weekends are a big rush to get things done....

well, it is all a bit of a juggling act

if you can afford it then get a cleaner etc. Do you have a partner? If so, then draw up a rota (we have one pinned to the fridge)so one of you isn't dumped with all the chores at home

life can sometimes feel like an endless whirl of working in and out of the home (me and DH are WOHM/D)- learn to let little things slide. I used to be anal about my house and it looking like a show home - in the end i realsied it took up way too much time and energy!

Get up earlier than you think in the morning to get lots of cuddles before work/school

doctors appts etc - if you have a reasonable boss you can take these in work hours and make the time up later on

days off for unexpected things - it happens to the best of us. Don't try to worry about stuff now that may not happen

it will be easier than you think - anticiapation of a change is always worse than the reality

dontwanttogetoutofbed, yes i agree, meant to say that... i enjoy my job, enjoy the salary/financial independence, so its worth it.

Sorry, X-posted Ruby - thanks for your more encouraging message.

Anyone else with some words of wisdom?

And another bump

.

i can' be the only person - where is Xenia

oh, and another thing - give it all 3 months. You need this long to get into the new routine

i tend to clean/tidy in the evenings so weekends aren't taken up with it - if you already have a cleaner then this will really help

find out what your employer's policy is on emergency leave. i get "reasonable" paid leave to deal with domestic crises, including sick children. it's not going to make things much easier but it helps to have it written down.

I try to take one day off every 6-8 weeks, to get "stuff" done, domestic engineering things that keep the house/family running. ie last Thursday I took as holiday and had new upstairs carpets fitted, whilst the hoover was being serviced, whilst Autoglass were fixing the chip on my windscree, then went to the hairdressers,then picked up dt's and took us all off to the dentist.
I find the financial independence is worth it, and am v grateful for late night repeats of the soaps each night - sitting down at 7.30pm is definitely a thing of the past!

I just started back full time, 5 days a week in September and I have three children 1.5, 3.5 and 6.5

I have a cleaner who does a blitz on the whole house every Friday

I spent nearly two days cooking meals and freezing them (casseroles, cottage pie, spag bol sauce, chilli etc), use 3 during the week normally and just have to cook rice/veg/pasta

I cook extra on a Sunday to last for the next evening meal

My husband does the ironing - usually Sunday morning or evening when I am with the children

I take two to nursery, he takes the eldest to breakfast club and does the pick ups at 5.30 (4 days a week)

I try and keep on top of paperwork during the week and do any admin jobs on a Sunday night

Get food shopping delivered

Hardly had time to come on here since though!!!!!!

emsie, who does the schoolrun for your dcs? How old are they?

Sorry not to come back to this sooner.

I think I am quite lucky really, as dh has a job which is v flexible, and he is regularly off for at least 1 day in the week, so can deal with anything home / car related that can only be done in office hours. As I've already said, I have a cleaner, so don't have to worry too much about cleaning etc.

Dd's are (nearly) 11 and 8 - dh will be doing the school run, as his work is 2 mins from their school. He will be collecting them from school and keeping them at his work until he finishes - this may not be ideal, but we are going to see how it pans out...

I think my real problem is that I feel like I am going to lose control over everything at home, and as I am a bit of a control freak ( says dh!), this is hard for me.

Thanks for all the tips so far, any more gladly received.

Get a babysitter in and do the shopping at the nearest 24hr supermarket with your DH and go for a meal before or after with DH.
Don't iron unless you absolutly have to.
Try and organise a mutual kid run with other parents, you arrange to take turns having other nearby children from 8am, its chaos on the day you have the other children, but its bliss on the other 4 days when you don't have to worry about the run.

You'll cope - I promise - it's good that you're going into it with your eyes wide open.

You said you had a cleaner, but how much work does she/he do? Do you have someone who can help with garden, school runs, other stuff? Do you live with someone who is housetrained and helpful?

Dentist - easy - early evening appointments - ditto hairdressers and doctors

Household admin - you get the letters and you stick them in the intray and allocate an hour a week to deal with the admin. DO EVERYTHING BY STANDING ORDER/DIRECT DEBIT.

Get your cleaning lady to do the ironing. Get a load of washing ready to put in before you go to work, stick it in when you come back, sort it out when you go to bed.

My other top tip is to find an odd job man. He can sort out the garage door that's inexplicably stopped working, trim the hedges, sort out mysterious leaks, doors that develop squeaks, window catches that fall off, cleaning the carpets, mowing the lawns in summer, fixing odd headboards, sorting out leaves in autumn etc. Make sure he comes around for at least two hours a week and you really do stay on top of things.