Work life balance or being comfortable financially

[0ut0fmydepth]

I know it’s hard to say without specifics but in general would you consider giving up a reasonable paid FT middle management job, wfh, good holidays, pension etc but that is stressful and unfulfilling for a low paid, no responsibility part time job that means loads more time for kids, yourself, keeping on top of housework etc?

Partner working FT, long hours, decent pay but with little involvement with the kids. Feeling very guilty about lack of time and fun with kids lately as both tired and grumpy but big drop in household income would also impact them. Financially comfortable for the first time really.

Recent sudden bereavement has also left me with itchy feet, life’s too short etc. Been with current company nearly 20 years because it’s fit around kids. No idea what I want to do longer term but just feel I need a break.

Just thinking out loud really, any advice?

You may need some breathing space - have you considered unpaid parental leave which is your statutory right?

I agree with the other posters encouraging you to drop hours or aide step rather than go into a low paid role.

@0ut0fmydepth

That’s a bit harsh@4amstarts, I’ve sacrificed my own career to facilitate his for the last 15 years. It’s not really my work life balance I’m concerned with, it’s making time for our children. I’m not proposing I spend my time off having coffee and getting my nails done.

Excellent reply OP. It's clear you're thinking of your family's needs above your own.

Quality of life trumps everything. Both my OH and I made the decision to leave our professions and prioritise time with the family and less stress over money. We sold our home and down-sized - we never regretted it, especially as he became ill and died last year. I often think how awful i would have been if we had not had some good times.

Your kids are teenagers though? Them having quality time with their mum isn't going to be on the agenda very shortly? Teenagers on the other hand are expensive and you said yourself the financial impact would effect them?

They’re pre-teens @4amstarts, one still at primary so not yet able to be left fully to their own devices but yes they certainly are expensive!

I’m so sorry for your loss @Mischance. I hope you all have some lovely memories together to treasure 💐

Hmm it's a hard one because as you have said your financially comfortable for the first time. If you went into another role would this change things? Do you have time at weekends to spend with your children? Could you possibly delegate some tasks for your partner to do / pay someone to clean? That way you would have more quality time to spend with them. HTH x

I’d think carefully about the financial impacts. Work carries stress but stressing about whether you can pay the bills won’t reduce your stress just change the focus so
consider that carefully.

@0ut0fmydepth

Thanks *@Animood* - you’re right and that sounds like a plan!

Good luck! Every faith you can sort this and cherish more time with the kiddos.

As you’ve been with your company for 20 years, could you potentially take a sabbatical?

Or unpaid parental leave for a few months (I think this would go down better - I’d make up a crisis tbh). Then you get a break without work questioning your commitment and can reassess

To answer your question: no, I wouldn’t give up my job. I’d spend more to outsource EVERYTHING to give myself a break. Once you step away from a secure & well paid job it can be hard to get that back, especially as ageism is rife

If it were me I'd choose time. You never get it back and before you know it your kids will be older. Nothing is more important than time.