Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Work

Chat with other users about all things related to working life on our Work forum.

So much stress around impending job interview

2 replies

LoveandHalloumi · 01/11/2021 11:08

I’m going to try to explain this as best as I can, without giving away too many outing details. I have a job interview next week which is causing me nothing but stress, to the point that I wish I’d never seen the bloody advert in the first place.

I work in a fairly niche sector which has been badly affected by both Brexit and the pandemic. There are currently high-level reviews happening about the future of this industry and there will likely be widespread redundancies. I love my job and my profession. I have undertaken significant amounts of study and additional qualifications to get myself to a senior position and having all of this taken away from me absolutely terrifies me. Not least because I’m simply not qualified for any job and would have to take a significant wage decrease to join any other industry.

A job recently came up at what is effectively the head office/governing body for our industry. This is a very very senior post. Until recently I had thought I had reached the highest level available to me but when I saw this job ad, it looked like the day to day work was much the same as what I am doing, but being paid a significant mount more. I was really intrigued by the job and decided to go for it. I really wasn’t sure what the outcome would be but I have been offered an interview which I have accepted. I was also at an event last week which was attended by the person in charge of everything. Although I’ve been in her presence before, she has never acknowledged me. This time she gave me a wink and told me I had submitted a very impressive application. This is obviously amazing but I’m having proper cold feet about the whole thing.

The positives to taking on this role (if I were to be offered after the interview) are obviously the money, but beyond that, it’s about (hopeful) increased job security given the climate I’ve noted above. I feel that the very fact this post has been advertised, and advertised as a permanent post, is an indication that there is a long term commitment to it. In contrast, at my level, any posts needing recruited to are being advertised on a temporary basis only as we don’t know what the future holds. Furthermore, I have felt constrained for a while, in my current role and level. The idea therefore of being part of the ultimate decision making process and driving strategies and initiatives really appeals to me. On paper the job sounds genuinely exciting.

On the other hand, I worry about the additional responsibilities which will come with a higher-level job. At present I work around 10-15 hours unpaid overtime per week but have made this work. I have caring responsibilities for elderly parents and also need downtime for my own mental health. I worry that a higher level post will result in more overtime and upset the balance I have cultivated. Recently, I am aware that another of the senior posts within the organisation was fired for not achieving enough – the general view though is that he was a scapegoat to cover up a bad decision made by the Directors which he then had to implement - and I’m worried that I’d have to keep up a level of dynamism to keep safe. This might not be a level I can easily keep up in my current menopausal, brainfogged, constantly tired, state. Crucially, I am aware that senior level posts like this one, in this governing body organisation, tend to have a worrying level of turnover. The person I’d be replacing has been off sick with stress for over 18 months before finally quitting. He was only in the role for a month or two beforehand. There are other managers also off sick at the moment. Over the past year or two, there have been numerous attempts at restructuring the organisation at the senior level. Everything seems to change every 3-4 months. I don’t want to leave my lovely team for a toxic atmosphere but neither do I want to run headlong into redundancy and financial hardship for my family.

I’d like to ask a question during the interview along the lines of “from my current positon in the industry, there is a perception that there is high staff turnover and frequent change within this organisation. Could you please address this – let me know if this is true and, if so, what is being done to combat the problem and increase staff satisfaction, or, if not, why do you think it appear this way to those of us outside the (body)”? Do you think this sounds ok to too blunt and confrontational?

My mum and my sister have already expressed concerns, both thinking a work too many long hours as it is and don’t think I should be aiming for a more senior post. Obviously mum is worried about the care I give her and DSis is worried that more responsibility will land on her. I do understand their concerns and although there are alarms bells ringing in my head, there is also the fact that the job does look genuinely exciting.

The other issue causing me stress is that the interview will centre on a 20 minute presentation. I haven’t yet been provided the title of the presentation and I’m starting to get nervous. As I’ve said, I provide a great deal of care for my parents and I’m about to spend 10 days with them (which I’ve taken as annual leave from current job). As it happens, I will get back home on the morning of the interview so that will work out fine. My parents don’t have wi-fi and live quite remotely and I’m aware that I’ll be needed 24/7 to provide care – my dad has just had a major operation so I’m going out to be there when he is discharged from hospital. If I don’t get the presentation topic in the next 48 hours, I’m screwed – there is no way I’ll be able to prepare this otherwise. The interview panel include some extremely high-level figures and I’m worried now that a bad or underprepared interview will have a negative effect in the long run, when they make decisions about the future of my current role. Withdrawing at this point could have a similar effect.

I haven't slept the last few nights worrying about this and would appreciate the support and wisdom of wise MNetters. I don’t even know what I’m asking here. Just wanted to get all my worries out in the open instead of bottled up inside.

OP posts:
catsharingmychair · 01/11/2021 13:28

I feel exhausted just hearing about the situation you are in. It sounds incredibly full on.

You sound like you could adapt to any new industry.
You are willing to learn and train, very hard working, ambitious and willing to go the extra mile regularly. Hard as it is, try not to worry if you do need to change industries. You can retrain, start your own business, become a consultant. There are so many options open to you. Perhaps try not to see it as so binary i.e just this new one or the current job?

Above all, this is your LIFE and you only have the one.
Did you notice you've not mentioned anything in your post about the things you love doing? Or the impact of the new job on these things? The things that make your life rich and enjoyable?
It sounds to me as if you are working all hours already?
With perhaps not much joy going on - or time for you?

So I ask you, what would make you enjoy your life more?
Would it be more fun things (e.g. creative stuff/art, seeing friends more, more learning, hobbies, travel, what?). Or would this very hard, exhausting, stressful new job make you enjoy your life more?

Perhaps do more research using questions to prompt you? For ex..

List pros and cons - which has more current/new job?

Write down what you enjoy about the current role and how many elements of the new job offer similar challenges/learning/enjoyment areas.
Consider if you actually need the new job intellectually?
Could you gain more intellectual satisfaction with a degree/Masters/other course (and not have the stress)? Then use this to gain promotion in a company that cares about its staff perhaps!!!

What actual £ difference will the money make to your life monthly- after tax, NI etc?

What would you spend the money on- anything important?

I'd also ...

Look up the Linked In account of the previous incumbent - had this person held senior level roles with no problem previously? If so, what does this say about working for the female CEO that winked at you?

Try and have an off the record telephone conversation with said incumbent (if they are willing to have a confidential interaction).

Try and understand if the CEO has lost other staff in the past year - so you can evaluate if being in her close team is stressful due to the workload, her management or external factors.

Try and resolve Menopausal symptoms- explore HRT -if not on this?

Write a gratitude list for your life right now and then work out whether the new job is needed or is just a nice to have, in a perfect world - one where you are not also having to be the amazing caregiver you are. :)

xxx

LoveandHalloumi · 01/11/2021 15:33

Thank you for your reply. To be honest, I felt my post was long enough without going into extracurricular activities so focused only on the job issues.

As I said, I do a fair bit of overtime but I am lucky that I manage this in ways which still allows me to have a decent work-life-balance. So I usually start work at 6 or 7am and work until 6.30ish. I’ll sometimes do a few hours on a Saturday morning but for the main part my evenings and weekends are kept free. Dealing with my parents’ health issues takes up two evenings per week, plus about 2/3 of my annual leave is spent visiting them (they moved to a remote location before health issues kicked in and are digging their heels in about staying there even though it makes it difficult to see them in person). My current employers are also good at giving me flexibility in the day in case I need to make calls on their behalf to doctors etc. On other evenings and weekends I definitely do lots of things for myself – outdoor swimming (I live near a reservoir and on a wfh day can be in the water within 20 minutes for closing my laptop which is a great way to shake off the working day and relax into the evening), I also read, knit, and watch a lot of live theatre (obviously not in the last 18 months but now coming back), both professional and amateur. DH and I love to travel – this has been curtailed by my parents’ declining health and need to use AL to be with them so the potential new job will have no bearing on that (same AL allowance as I have right now) but would love to get back into travelling and seeing new places at some point in the future. Weekends, I'm barely in the house - always got things I want to do or people to meet up with. I am worried that the new job would eat into this “me-time”. I hate the thought of having to work late in the evenings and missing my swim or opportunities to go out with friends or DH.

In terms of the difference the money would make – it’s actually quite significant: we would love to move house to somewhere with a bigger garden. We’re both keen gardeners but have seen this as a pie in the sky dream as houses in our area (we don’t want to move far) are just that bit out of reach. This would put us in reach. Conversely though, if I were to lose my job, we’d probably have to downsize and move from the house we are currently in (lovely and ideal sized house but with tiny garden) to a flat with no garden at all.

What I love about my current job is developing people and also creating business plans and steering my team through changes and initiatives to enhance and improve the service we offer. What I dislike are any financial/budgetary elements (and I do seem to be spending more and more time sitting with spreadsheets than working with people) and also the fact that whenever I have an idea, it has to go through several hoops, including the organisation I’m applying to, before it can get approved for action. I’d like to just roll up my sleeves and get on with things. The new job opportunity is focused on business and people development and this is exactly what excited me enough to apply – it’s exactly the elements I enjoy.

Looking at the LinkedIn account of the last person is a great idea. I never really got to know him as he wasn’t around for long. I have wanted to talk to others in the organisation but I have a sneaking suspicion that some of the people I know might also be going for this job so it leaves me with not many people to turn to.

At the end of the day though, the situation is that the new job would be nice to have, rather than essential UNLESS I lose my current job, in which case I’d rather be giving the new opportunity a try than start again elsewhere.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread