Christmas Meals

[Subbaxeo]

I don’t enjoy work Christmas meals. I like my colleagues to work with and work well with them, but I have my work face on when I’m there and really don’t want to socialise outside with them. I don’t want to spend an evening either whooping with fake jollity or bitching about Clara going off on long term sick. Does that make me weird? I know I’m an introvert although sociable with family and friends. The only positive thing about Covid was that work meals disappeared. But I’m dreading this year’s. Especially with the workplace bully there (there’s always one, isn’t there?)
It’s also very expensive and I’d rather spend the money on something nice for my family. Do other people feel like this? How do you deal with it?

In 2019 I went with my family to London to watch a show on the night of our work Christmas meal. I enjoyed it far more.

Somehow the work Christmas meal always clashed with the village Christmas party.
If it’s lunchtime it’s more difficult but a day off for a group trip to a Christmas market might cover it.

Sorry, you said it was evening.
I had a boss who just kept repeating ‘we have other plans’ (rather than spend £50 on a Christmas dinner dance). When we met his wife, she said they had decided not to go.

Yes had thought of just saying Christmas Dos aren’t my thing but wasn’t sure if it would go down well!

@Subbaxeo

Yes had thought of just saying Christmas Dos aren’t my thing but wasn’t sure if it would go down well!

I like the MN response of [Sorry] "That doesn't work for you me". If there are questions why, just say you already have conflicting plans. I'm one of those people who usually query if I asked for availability of my private time so I'm not on the back foot for invitations I don't want to accept.

Good luck. 🌹

@Subbaxeo

Yes had thought of just saying Christmas Dos aren’t my thing but wasn’t sure if it would go down well!

I’m with you OP. I’ve hated each and every one of the work Christmas do’s I haven’t managed to wriggle out of. Don’t do it to yourself. Find a way out, any way you can!

Just say you can't make it. I would hate any of my team to come because they felt they had to. For me, it's there for them, so if they don't want to be there, then they shouldn't be

I hate them with a vengeance but I go because I think it looks bad not to and it's just one day of the year. I do dread it though!

I just say not my cup of tea anymore. I've done plenty in my thirties and forties. Really don't care as I approach 50 whether it goes down well or not, one of the big benefits of getting older you care far less what people think.

If you are expected to pay, give that as an excuse that you cannot spend X amount of money on a night out or come up with an excuse why you cannot go on that particular night.

I hate then, although work pay, I hardly ever go, never have, as it's all fakery unless your in the in crowd.

This year it's a stopped 100 people affair, I mean you may as well write off the fortnight after with covid infections!

I always used to go to them, some where good and some bad.
I have found now as I am older I only go to meals I want too, if I like the menu and the people I will be with.
For the last 3 years I have not gone to the Christmas or summer party's.

I just don't go. If I'm asked, I just say "no thanks". I'm not being paid to attend, in fact I'll have to spend money!

I sat I have something pre booked that weekend. Its ten years since I went fo a Christmas party. It's all great in one respect but then the batch comments and gossip starts.

I don't give a reason other than we've tickets booked for xyz

I've not been to our work Christmas meal for several years now, simply because I don't want to. I think it's acceptable to simply not feel like it. But, yes, I agree that they can be an expensive night out and I'd rather spend my money on my family.

Just decline politely. If pushed say something vague like I've other plans, I'm afraid.

Plans to spend the money on something other than a night out with the office bully!