Weekly one-to-one meetings with my managers, no idea what to talk about

[earowwww]

I have to have weekly 30 minute meetings with my two line managers. I’m not sure if it’s because I’m a new starter or whether it’s company policy. However, I really struggle to know what to say during them as honestly, everything is going pretty well. I’m not sure whether to just start asking them for general advice e.g. how do they advise I manage my workload or something. The 30 minutes really drag for us all with lots of awkward silences… in my previous job, I never had any formal meetings with my line manager so I really don’t know how they are meant to go.

Does anyone have any advice or insight into how they should go.

I would assume they'll lead the topics, but in my 1:1s with my team I generally cover:

Tasks on their to-do list for the week
Work they are doing towards development goals (eg carving out a couple of hours to improve SQL skills) or discussion about goals they should be working towards
Anything they're struggling with or need me to chase down (access tickets, software installs)

I would go in armed with notes based around that to start with.

Sounds bizarre. Start with general chit-chit (basic, but some people forget this). I would take a list of what I’m currently working on, progress on tasks, any issues/difficulties/sticking points (think about how you would resolve these and try to make suggestions), come prepared with any questions or improvements you’ve thought of. If you’re really struggling with awkward silences maybe ask if they need anything else from you. Sum up with what actions you will take away, if any. Where I work if discussions and pleasantries are over we finish the meeting early - perhaps you could suggest if there isn’t anything else that needs to be discussed there and then you could get back to whatever you’re working on. If you’ve tried all this, perhaps ask for the meetings to be bi-weekly with the understanding that either party can reach out if anything else needs discussing.

Have they stated the purpose of the meetings?

I have a 30 min weekly catch up scheduled with my team, we use it to discuss outstanding issues and to disseminate information, but if that only takes 10 minutes then we cut the call short. No need for everyone to waste time on a call when it's not needed.

It can be a good opportunity, if you use it well. I know some line managers that are invisible to their team, so it can be beneficial knowing you have that protected time in the diary to catch up.

Is this really that unusual? I have 20 mins with my boss weekly, and 30 mins with each of my directs.

We usually spend the first 5-10 minutes chatting about life - how are you/partner/kids/dog, looking forward to/enjoyed weekend/holiday, how is such & such going.

Then if they have anything they need my input on, they'll raise it. If I have something to ask/tell them, I will.

We'll have a general chat about their workload and what they're doing, so I can give direction about where to spend time, where to put effort, and where to challenge. We'll talk about any development opportunities or things they want to do and how we can make those things happen.

If we only need 15-20 mins then that's fine & we'll finish early.

I had this issue - I kept wondering what we were both there for as he never seemed to have anything specific to give me / discuss.

I came to realise that he wanted to talk about anything other than work, to give himself a break. So now I go in armed with a bullet point list of things I need to know / want to discuss and then we just chat about anything.

I had regular weekly meetings with my boss (plus about 8 million other calls with him a week). Generally, it was an opportunity to run through what I was working on, update him on progress or flag any issues and discuss next steps. If there wasn't much to say, we didn't insist on dragging it out!

I have an hour every other week, if we don't have much to say we cut it short - definitely don't sit in silence!

If he doesn’t have an agenda then you can make one. General chit chat, Outstanding tasks, what is holding them up if anything, next steps, aims for the week, priorities, what you need, what they need, if there is time left ask if there is anything else and suggest finishing there if not. It may be they have been told to have them as you are new and they dread them as much as you!

You don’t need to take responsibility for this. They’re the managers: they can manage the meetings. Answer their questions properly and comprehensively and when you’ve nothing left to say, stop talking. It doesn’t matter if there are awkward silences: it’s not your responsibility to fill them.

If you know what your objectives are start to work out what your bosses objectives are, and how you can help them with theirs. Ask for a review of your objectives at 6 months. Ask for feedback from people you work with at 6 months. Be proactive in driving your career - you care more than anyone else.

As a new starter, it would make a lot of sense to say
"I really appreciate you taking the time to meet with me, but am wondering what the purpose is of meeting for 30 minutes every week. Is there some information or date you need from me? Or how should we be structuring the meetings? Obviously I don't want to waste your time if there isn't anything I need help with at the moment, but if there is something you need from me, I am not sure what that is at the moment."

@Kite22

As a new starter, it would make a lot of sense to say "I really appreciate you taking the time to meet with me, but am wondering what the purpose is of meeting for 30 minutes every week. Is there some information or date you need from me? Or how should we be structuring the meetings? Obviously I don't want to waste your time if there isn't anything I need help with at the moment, but if there is something you need from me, I am not sure what that is at the moment."

Unless they are new to the workforce, I would be surprised if any new employee asked me what a 1:1 was for, they are pretty standard.

OP, I have been in management for many years so have held hundreds of 1:1s and of course have attended many my managers too. The meetings are mainly a progress update on ongoing work, I wouldn’t necessarily expect it to be used for coaching such as seeking advice on how to manage workload generally (as per your OP) but if you are juggling a few things, then it is an opportunity to ask about prioritisation.

As others have said, yes the first five minutes are general chit chat and asking about welbeing. At the end of the meeting I would also bring up any personal matters such as mentioning any training courses I would like to attend, requesting annual leave or notifying of doctors appointments and so on.

It has always been the case for me that both manager and employee would have a list of agenda items, with slightly more onus on the employee to have the list than the manager. If I were you I would start to keep a rolling list of items to discuss and physically bring it with you every week.

Agree with everything said here, sounds like your managers (who should be setting the agenda, figuratively) are failing here.

But in terms of things to talk about, if you are just looking for ideas to get your conversations more well-rounded and build rapport, I often bring up general company stuff, not especially related to me and possibly slightly gossipy/chatty e.g. "What do you make of the new policy saying that we will now only travel overseas to clients if their company policy is to allow their staff to travel internationally too? Can't see that playing out well with xxx client!". Or "Did you watch the webinar shared by xxx? It seemed a bit over the top for what we do, although the bit on why 'saying no to clients can be good for business' did resonate with me"

Unless they are new to the workforce, I would be surprised if any ne employee asked me what a 1:1 was for, they are pretty standard

That must be industry specific. I had my first full time job in 1981, and have worked every year since and have never had weekly 1:1s with Managers. What on earth would people talk about every week ? . Either you are doing a simple straightforward job where there aren't too many decisions to be taken, or, where you are doing a more responsible job, I would expect you to be trained , experienced and equipped to make those decisions for yourself. Micro managing staff like that must be incredibly time consuming for those managers.

@kite22 You genuinely think that spending 30 minutes, once a week, talking to a person and listening to them is micro managing? Really?

What we talk about every week is what's going on in our lives and any wellbeing concerns. So someone has a bad back and I can direct them to health benefits, or someone's partner is unwell and we can agree a working pattern/expectations they can meet while supporting their partner, for example. They update me about their teams and who's doing well, struggling, etc. We talk about things they are struggling with or don't know how to handle, and I can coach them through how to approach it. We can vent about certain individuals or situations. If there are any performance issues or miscommunications, I can pick them up early and manage them through. If there are upcoming deadlines we can agree how to meet them or alternatively whether they need to be pushed back.

I don't think 30 minutes out of a 35 hour working week is "micromanaging" or in any way excessive - we're a team, we work together. I certainly don't bark out orders but neither do I throw them in and say right , see you at your year end appraisal...

Well if you manage a Team of 20, then that is actually 10 hours, not 30mins, which seems an awfully high proportion of the working week to me, yes.

@Kite22

Well if you manage a Team of 20, then that is actually 10 hours, not 30mins, which seems an awfully high proportion of the working week to me, yes.

That is too far too many direct reports though, no manager would be able to give those twenty people the attention and time they deserve. Another layer of supervision / management would be appropriate for a team that size.