New start new job next week and have to attend court!

[Laladell]

Hi everyone,

I will try and keep this brief as I can and hopefully will get some answers as this site has been a wealth of info while I'm going through all of this.

A couple of weeks ago my ex was arrested for committing the most serious form of assult on myself.

I managed to actually find a new job while all this is going on and it's my dream job tbh, the people seem nice, it's great hours and incredible pay it's a great opportunity for me and a fresh start in my eyes

Only problem is my exes bail is up on the 24th and I need to get a non molestation order in place before then. Due to the severity of the crime comitted it will be sorted within the next week which is when I start my job! I start on Monday!

I've been told I will need to attend 2 hearings I really don't know what to say to my new employers 😭 I know I have to tell them but it just seems so unprofessional to already be having time off within the FIRST week.

Tbh I wasn't planning on telling them until the trial if he pleaded not guilty 😩 any advice would truly be welcomed as I don't know at all how to broach this subject at all

Thank you xxxx

Honestly, as a manager, if someone explained as you just have I’d have absolutely no issues with giving them time off. If you don’t want to go into details though, you could just say that you need to attend court as a witness, and a decent manager should be understanding.

We had someone miss their first week as they needed emergency surgery. These things happen. It's not within your control.

Yeah just say you are so looking forwards to working with them sod law, you have to attend a court thing that week as a witness. Appologise and tell them you were not expecting to have to go but they've called you. These things cant be helped.

(by these things happen,I mean things happen even in the first week of work. I didn't mean to dismiss the seriousness of what you are going through! Sorry, I just realised how badly that could be misread)!

Tell them what you've told us. It will be in confidence. They should be very understanding. Good luck.

If I was your new boss, I'd do everything in my power to support you. It wouldn't cross my mind that you're unprofessional in any way - just that you're an amazingly strong person who has been through something horrendous.

@mynameiscalypso

If I was your new boss, I'd do everything in my power to support you. It wouldn't cross my mind that you're unprofessional in any way - just that you're an amazingly strong person who has been through something horrendous.

Absolutely

@mynameiscalypso

If I was your new boss, I'd do everything in my power to support you. It wouldn't cross my mind that you're unprofessional in any way - just that you're an amazingly strong person who has been through something horrendous.

This. Be as honest as you want op they don't need to know full details but you can get a lot of support through work.

@KeyboardWorriers its fine honestly I know what you meant x

Would it be better to ring my new boss over the weekend to have a chat or wait till I'm in?

But thanks everyone I'm just so worried as this is a bloody fantastic opportunity for me and its been a long time coming. My last job were so unsupportive of everything, it was terrible, my boss wouldn't let me go and be interviewed when he was arrested him (the inspector had to ring them and tell them to let me leave) and they refused to suspend him from where I worked (it was a gym which he was a member at, had full access to, including my office and no one would of known he was there). So I had to leave I was not risking my own safety for them. So I'm worried this workplace may not be supportive either.

Obviously it's very hard for me but I have support in place and this job I'm viewing as a new positive distraction, so another worry is if they think this may affect my work levels as it definitely will not.

I was in a similar situation to you, in that I had to tell my new boss something Police-related pertaining to close family members, just as I was about to start my new job. I found it really embarrassing. My line manager was brilliant, though. She was so supportive, saying that if I needed time off further down the line to help cope with the trauma, that would be fine.