Flexibility and life balance, or £20k payrise?

[QforCucumber]

I have today been put forward for a very similar role to my own, in a larger, more corporate firm who are offering £20k a year more than I earn now - however I know the company, they don't offer much in the way of flexibility and advertised hours are usually an 'advisory' and the expectation is to work over. it is around a 15/20 min commute.

My current role, is 34 hours a week (the new is a base of 40 but I have asked if they'd consider fewer) 1.5 miles from home, flexible so I can do school drop offs and a pick up once a week, wfh once a week, I like coming to work basically, low staff turnover but small first = lower wage.

20k a year would make a huge difference to our lives.

Home life - DH and I both working 5 days, 5 yr old and 1 yr old at home. currently, due to FT nursery fees cannot afford 2nd car/cleaner etc. Living month to month for another 2 years until free hours kick in and if anything goes wrong it'll be credit cards.

Any outsider, balanced views?
(I'm aware I've not been offered the job yet, but now it's in my head I need to figure out what do do if I am)

@QforCucumber

Thanks *@FatJan*, my circa - in that, honeslty, I'd be happy to be offered 40k and fewer hours than the listed 50k and increased hours. Even 40 would still be a 13k increase and make a difference.

Who knows, I might just be getting carried away with myself

I agree, beware of the structure of what they offer you (like 50k including bonus, not the same, and eg based on what objectives?) and DON'T hesitate to negotiate your worth and hold your ground. Good luck and well done building that rep in the market!

Go for the money

I would take the new job - it pushes you into an exciting career trajectory, not only will you make a fantastic leap this time but the next leap will be even greater. Big things will come to you! Grab the chance while you can!

I was basically in your position (even the figures were the same - 27k to 50k ish!) and took the job. The money does make a huge difference to our lives - before everything was planned to the nth degree, expensive things like Christmas presents and holidays were put on the credit card then paid off afterwards, nothing was going into savings. Now things are paid for upfront with ease, we have a cleaner and use meal boxes to make life easier, more luxuries, nice cars and holidays, and plenty going into savings.

However the expectations in terms of responsibility and being prepared to work over my hours has also taken a massive hike and I’ve really struggled with it. The stress is immense. I love that the kids never go without and have so much more opportunity re life experience but feel sad that my youngest (big age gap) doesn’t have anything like the same experience of maternal input that my older one did when they were little - it was especially noticeable in the lockdowns when, although I was wfh, work was so busy and he was essentially left to fend for himself with the crappy virtual learning set by school - he’s now fallen way behind where he was because I just didn’t have the time to do it with him 😔

I love the financial benefits but if I had my time again, I wouldn’t make the jump until my youngest was much older. And maybe not even then.

I’d also take the job. It might be hard for a few years while you build your reputation but once you've done that you can increase your flexibility at a time when you might need it more (middle school years, sports days etc). That sort of extra money can buy you freedom from chores.. get a cleaner once or twice a week for a start.
I wfh 40 plus hours a week but with lots of flexibility for drop offs and pick ups. It can be done eventually.
Hope you get it!

Ps webuiltthepyramids, have you looked into tutors? If your son is behind because you couldn’t work and home school (understandable!).. a tutor would help catch them up in no time. The one on one is invaluable

I’ve just been offered a new role with a £20k increase by a competitor and it was amazing how quickly my current employer counter offered - they offered the same increase plus promotion within 24 hours of me handing in my notice.

I’ve accepted the new role as need the challenge but always worth the conversation as and when you get offered something new.

I would do it for that money even if it would be logistically hard for a couple of years.

I'm just about to leave a corporate firm for an inhouse role (I'm a solicitor) - basically for a more family friendly and less "unpredictable" work/life balance.
I have a 1 year old and want another baby soon.

£20k is a big hike though. I just got my annual pay increase - which was then matched by my new employer. If my current employer offers me more money to stay, to be fair, it would have to be around £20k more (tax) (which is highly unlikely...)
Depends on what your salary is and what the role is and what the firm is like - if it will offer you the flex you need.

For example, do they promote flexible / family friendly working? DO you know anyone elese that works ther that could help inform etc?

Sorry just reread your post re what you know about the new firm.

@QforCucumber

Thanks all, just a waiting game to see if it becomes a reality now I guess.

@kite22 his employer are flexible with hours and that's how he does a school pick up too and we've always taken sickness and now holidays equally, but there's no negotiation on his salary is what I meant (he also has a boss who doesn't 'believe' in wfh, even though its been their new norm he wants them all back to normal ASAP)

My huge worry is the kids, so many people say it goes so fast, you don't look back and wish you'd worked more hours etc. And they feel so little, I'd really like to try keep my 1 pick up a week as ds really enjoys it, he gets so happy when he realises its me not the cm getting him from school.

If and when you are offered the role I would simply say that you currently do one pick up per week, and is it feasible to do a longer day one day in exchange for an early finish on a Wednesday or whatever.

I'll be honest, I have worked full time and often long hours while my kids were very small. I guilt tripped over it for a long time but now that they are 11 and 8, having flexibility at this age is invaluable. The ability to afford good quality childcare when they were small was life changing

I would be prepared to negotiate over flexibility. You might find they are very willing to accommodate.

One of my colleagues works 7 - 3 to accommodate childcare. Another works 7.30 - 6 four days a week and has every Monday off.

I would take it if offered, but be very clear about needing flexibility. If they want you, they should accommodate you.

@EmmaGrundyForPM

I would be prepared to negotiate over flexibility. You might find they are very willing to accommodate.

One of my colleagues works 7 - 3 to accommodate childcare. Another works 7.30 - 6 four days a week and has every Monday off.

I would take it if offered, but be very clear about needing flexibility. If they want you, they should accommodate you.

That would depend on the job though - we couldn’t offer someone 7-3 everyday regardless of how much we liked them - we could sometimes and maybe even most of the time but not always and we’d be worried the exceptional times when people would be most needed would be a problem.

To update - I have an interview on the 25th

I think 1 or even 2 school pick ups would be negiotiable in most jobs, either an early start or a longer day on the others.

When I gave up my day off in the week and went ft I did;
M 9-4:30 (did the morning)
T 8-5:30 (DH wfh)
W 8:30-4:30 (school run Mum)
T 9-2:30 (both school runs)
F 8-5:30 (DH wfh)

Good luck cucumber!

Good luck!