4 kids 5yrs and under - would I be crazy to return to work or crazy not to!!

[crazymother]

I am fairly well qualified but work in a position lower than what i would have expected to be if I hadn't had the children. Last year I had a suprise (shock!) fourth pregnancy and gave birth to my fourth child 13 mo after dc3.
My dc are now aged 5.5yrs, 4yrs, 19mo and 6 mo.

I am currently on extended Mat Leave. My husband has just been promoted and doesn't want me to return to work as his life is easier when i am at home.

I work 2 days a week. I'm fairly certain that my employers are hoping that I give up . After paying childcare for all four I won't earn any money- well probably £50 pm if I'm lucky. Plus, my husband won't be able to help me get them to out of school care/ nursery and they will be in two different places.

However, whilst I know it makes sense for me to quit, I feel very nervous about doing so. Being at home all the time is driving me crazy and I'm frightened of not getting back into the work place/ moving down a level when I do. I'm also quite ambitious and would like to work more/ move up the career ladder sometime soon.

So, I guess I'm asking if anyone else has been in this positon and if its possible to combine this number of small children and work without losing the plot!

Blimey, 4 under 5 you brave woman

IMO working for virtually nothing is madness plus you'd have all the other stuff to do when you get home. Can't you stay working 2 days a week for the moment? I personally wouldn't be happy leaving a 6 mo full time if that's what you are considering as I think they need their Mum at that age. What is it you do if you don't mind my asking?

I think if you have kids you have to accept that they come first for the first couple of years rather than career. That's just my opinion tho and I'm sure lots of others do work full time no probs

Well,put it this way;going to work will at least give you a rest and a break.

I only have one child and have one on the way. I work two days a week and am now treated as a lowly part-timer after having been on the management team when I was full time. Frustrating, but I love my two days at work. Its nice to dress smartly and stay smart all day (e.g. no sticky fingers, dinner, drinks etc. all over me) and I enjoy spending a couple of days with adults. I enjoy my daughter all the more for having a bit of 'me time.' Also, as well as us needing the money, I have to work to 'keep my foot in the door' - as you said, if I want promotion later and don't want to start from square one again. Good luck!

FWIW I gave up work completely for my 2 until dd2 was 18m then went back part time. I love it and find it's a good combination although obviously career progression is fairly non starter atm.

hi,
I went back to work when my 4 were aged 8 and under. I am currently single, have no childcare support from ex, and get by with help from au pairs.
You must live close to your work! I have got a 3 hour round journey, which is not good.
Overtime is a non-starter.
I often find that I don't have enough individual time in the week to spend with each child.
For example, at the moment, ds2 is in hospital, dd2 is upset because our AP just left, we have no AP, dd1 & ds1 are upset because of problems with ex.
I have just packed 3 whining, crying children off to bed, and I know I should have spent some time with each of them, but the time just wasn't there, also I am knackered.
I never go on school trips, and have not yet been to a parents' evening, because there are 4 children, and I dont have time or money for babysitting.

I don't have a choice about working full time, because of not having a partner. But if I could stay at home I would, because my children are definitely a bit neglected at the moment.

On the other hand, I can understand how the career thing must bug you.
In my industry, lots of people work 4 days a week, would this be possible?
Can you re-train and launch a new, more family friendly career in a few years from now?