Help me articulate bullying behaviour

[CombatBarbie]

Urgh, so work for MOD. In short my boss is a toxic bully. I have been declared unfit for work but HR have asked for me to come in and hand over security/finance stuff as I am the only person with access, which is fine as I was assured my boss had been told to WFH this week, solely so I could do my stuff. Only he rocked up at 1030 and although he has not approached me, is swanning round like he owns the joint whilst I sit struggle to try and get a grip on my anxiety and blood pressure.

I'm trying to articulate this particular behaviour for my grievance but am struggling.

Any suggestions welcomed

I would have picked up my things, walked out there and then, and emailed HR to tell them that I had been assured he would not be there and that it made you feel x and y.

I did debate it trust me, I did end up leaving early as I couldn't concentrate. It's just the sheer audacity of him doing that.... I just can't wrap my head round it

I think you need to move on - he came into work - maybe he was skulking around trying to intimidate you but you have no proof - he didn't approach you - he has a right to go into the office and attend to his work, - you'll sound paranoid and more anxious than you already feel.

Well I did feel intimidated but my feelings are valid. This is just another thing in a long list of my grievance against him.

To be told to WFH from HR and his line manager and then defy that order/request? Its this behaviour I'm trying to articulate.

You are assuming g that he was told to WFH - you don't know that the conversation actually happened.

In this particular instance you're grievance shouldn't be about 'he did x deliverer to make me feel y' just simple email Ht and explain you came in at their request to handover on the assurance he wouldn't be there, he was there and therefore you won't be going in again.

Is the handover completed? I presume to are handing over processes/work and not just handing over your laptop - first post isn't clear.

I have it in writing from HR and verbally from his line manager that he would not be in office this week due to the ongoing issues.

The handover is supposed to be until Thursday.

Email HR now copying in the line manager just stating the facts.....You have email confirmation that he has been told to work from home and yet he was in the office at the same time as you. Ask for confirmation that this will be reiterated to him that he is to be out of the office to allow the handover and tell them you won't be able to stay if he turns up against this agreement. Then stick to it. If he turns up you leave and email HR/manager at the time of leaving explaining why you're away early. Don't stay and make yourself ill.mod everything by email to keep a paper trail

Bullying is a blanket term that may involve

Intimidation
Belittling
Marginalising, disenfranchising
Shaming in front of other staff

The key thing about bullying is that it is a subjective situation (even though there are objective characteristics that can help to identify bullying behaviour), for which you have a right to investigate provided you make it clear how it affected you.

For your grievance to hold water, you need to be very clear and specific
Eg:
Manager A did xxxxx, which made me feel yyyyy [enter descriptive words on how their behaviour made you feel]

You need to be factual. Saying things like "he walked round like he owns the place" or words to that effect, is not factual and could lose credibility. If you feel that by coming in that day it was a deliberate premeditated attempt of the Manager to cause you distress, make you feel threatened or anxious, then say it in those terms, and they will have to investigate his actions as part of the grievance process.

Thanks @daiaychain01 the last part of your last paragraph is what I was looking for! I just couldn't find the words to put on paper. Incidentally I arrived at work today and he was there again so HR told me to hand my keys in for my office and go home.

It is very deliberate on his part but this behaviour just strengthens my argument that he a bully.

I'm sorry he is subjecting you to that treatment, it is very unpleasant, and I hope you can pull together a strongly worded grievance. It is very disappointing this is happening in MOD as they have a robust bullying policy, so I hope they handle it directly and decisively.