I am a bit lost at the moment - I’m trying to plan to start a family but my career is going very well at the mo. I’ve finally found something I’m good at! By the end of 2022 I am hoping to get to Director level.
However. I’m nervous about TTC during this period of career growth - I’m 33 this year and annoyingly my body clock is ticking! We don’t have any kids at the moment as we’ve focussed on our careers. I’m likely to have a “complex” pregnancy because of a genetic issue, and also likely to carry twins. So I would likely need to be quite careful whilst pregnant (and maybe even start mat leave early).
Realistically I can afford to have one baby now, take stat mat pay for a year and then pay for nursery childcare...but in my head I’m struggling to see how I’d balance that with my career once I returned to work. I often travel to London at 6am and get back at 8pm (usually twice a month). My husband works long hours routinely (8am to 7pm).
My mother in law would be delighted to help but she has struggled to care for elderly relatives over the last 18 months and I would hate to place a burden on her.
I also don’t want to “disappear” for a year out
of the business and jeopardise my promotion. But I’m also aware that when I’m 95, I’m unlikely to think “oh, I wish I’d got that promotion” but I am likely to think “oh, I wish that I’d had children when I had the chance”.
I’m adamant that I want to be able to comfortably provide for my family if ever needed on my own salary.
Right now, if I add nursery costs in to the equation, I could not do this. My husband’s solution is to save for nursery costs whilst we are both earning; we could save a year’s worth of nursery fees in that time as a buffer.
He is the main breadwinner and is very supportive and can comfortably afford to support us. He is happy if I opt to stop work to have babies, but I am very independent and I dislike the idea of relying on one income source.
Help please! My friends just tell me to quit working or that you “find a way” but this doesn’t work for my planner’s brain!
What can be done in this situation? Is there a magical solution that helps to balance it all out?