ENOUGH ALREADY! I have stepped off the ladder - FINALLY

[pena]

Hi all,
Altho' I have been away from mumsnet for a while, some of you may recall the teeth gnashing that I shared at the beginning of the year after returning to work following a ridiculously short 2 month maternity leave, then gritting my teeth thru' work & an evil super-bitch boss (unmarried, addicted to Manolo Blahnic shoes) who spends her time politicising at work.

ENOUGH ALREADY!!

I quit my job a couple of days ago. It has not been an easy decision. Aside from evil boss condemning me to oblivion, I - like everyone else also need to deal w/ the anxiety given the recession. I don't think I have found a satisfactory answer to the whole debate over having a fulfilling career & family. Does it have to be one vs. the other?

But I do know this - its tough work to be a good mum & wife & career person, but its easy to forget about one's own personal fulfillment. Why spend each day battling monsters at work? Adieu to big corporate life - good grief. And hello to finding the work situation & people who are supportive of the multiple roles I have.

And guess what - a pair of Manolo Blahnic strappy sandals cost at least US$800. Who is the fool here!

Hi all,
Lindy is right on. It is important to have hobbies & interests. In my case, I am a self-confessed order & control freak at work - so I felt that it was/is important to create structure & purpose to my days - esp as I adapt to this new life. And it does feel like adapting to a new country.

This is my week 2 of being SAHM. Here are what I've discovered...

1. I realised that I didn't really know ds that well. (well how could I if I only saw him max 2hrs a day).
2. I am discovering facets of ds' personality. And dis may sound cringey & artificial, but I do feel for the very first time, that the maternal instincts r kicking in n I am bonding w/ him i.e. he crawled up to me in bed for a snuggle (he's never done that before - aw shucks!!! )
3. I can only take so much of ds. It is important to create time for yourself, to read papers, catch up on email, catch up with friends.
4. Structure is impt to me, so I schedule my day with chores, outings, small projects.
5. Make plans - Before taking this big step, I did have a broad idea in mind of things to keep me busy e.g. work on this book project with a friend, learn to drive, try for #2 next year, take language lessons to brush up French
6. Set up some back up plans in case being a SAHM doesn't suit you or starts to drive u nuts. I am still maintaining work contacts n meeting other people & from outset, I've positioned myself as available for project work. I'd like to maintain some contacts in case I go nuts & need mental stimulation or if dh loses his job in Jan.

More humorous things I've discovered...

7. Enter the brave new world of mummy-playgroup politics. Being new to all this, I suddenly feel like last kid in playground who doesn't get picked for sides i.e. all babies in ds' age r already in playgroups n I feel like a retard asking if we can join them esp when they appear to have already signed a secret pact in blood 10 months ago.

8. People in suits treat me like an idiot or invisible. Doesn't bother me (at least not yet) since I can eavesdrop on their conversation (hehe) & smirk at how inane all that business buzzword-speak is e.g. value-add, synergistic.

pena - lol at the secret blood pact thing. Having the same problem myself as we've just moved to a small village in Spain (cue twitching curtains - the old men wandering around with goats kind of makes up for it though).

good luck with your new career!

pena - so much of what you say resonates with me. i worked 4 days/week for a time before ds2 was born, and felt I missed out on so much with ds1. I've got to know him so much better since ds2 was born and I've cut my hours. It's amazing.

Pena - loved your point 8 'business speak' - what a load of rubbish it all is, am sure I was probably part of it in my time, but it just seems so bizarre now!! I loved reading in the newspaper this week that my old company had spent £Xmillion on some project exactly the same as had been tried - and failed several years ago - gave a wry smile!!! Also amused (but irritated) that the job I used to do is now done by seven people !!!!!!!