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New job and anxiety handhold please

2 replies

sprinkleyumnut · 13/04/2021 20:38

Hi all. So I've been monophobic for years. If you don't know what it is, it's definitely not a common fear/phobia. It's when you get extremely anxious left on your own. In my case I have a panic attack and I cannot be left on my own even at home I know someone is always there. I've tried lots of different therapies and still have one left to try.

Anyway I quit my job for a job at a care home and they were really quite awful when I got anxious. I suffer from low confidence and self esteem so it knocked me down further. I got a job recently in retail. The store is huge and I just feel so stupid as I should of known I am not comfortable in huge stores but after going from a job I was comfortable in but hated to another, I've had to go on universal credit and desperate not to be on it and to work.

This new workplace has been brilliant with me and they said how well I did in interview. But all they know is I don't like being on my own and said there's always people in the building in total 50 staff. The problem is, I just went along with it so as not to trouble them. They don't know the extent of my monophobia. They don't know I will have a panic attack if I'm asked to get stock upstairs or go to the back of the store.

I feel so stupid and don't want to waste their time. They have been amazing with me but i feel they can do better. I would love to work there but I don't think they would be able to support me all the time understandably. I'm meant to be going into tomorrow and I will, and will tell them the extent.

OP posts:
sprinkleyumnut · 13/04/2021 20:40

By "I feel they can do better" I actually meant I feel they can find someone better

OP posts:
autumnalrain · 14/04/2021 15:38

Hi OP this seems difficult. I think you should explain to them the extent of your fear. I’m sure they’ll be grateful that you were open and honest instead of avoiding duties. However, as you probably already know, the only way to make steps towards improving is to tackle it head on.

For example, I used to suffer with quite bad claustrophobia which meant travelling on the tube was terrifying. (I live in London.) When the tube used to stop in the tunnel I would have panic attacks. Which as you know are horrible. But as time went on I slowly started learning how to self-soothe.

If I continued to give into my fear and avoided travelling on tube i wouldn’t be where I am now! So yes, going into the stock cupboard may seem terrifying but I promise you that you’ll never make improvements if you keep avoiding it.

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