Am I lazy?

[June628]

I am due to go back to work from maternity leave shortly. My DD is going to a nursery open from 8-6. I work 20 miles away, which is around a 45 min drive from home. I initially thought I’d work 9-5 to maintain a 7.5 hour day however I have now agreed to work 9-4 as I was worried about not getting back in time for nursery closure and I didn’t want to get back too late; still wanting to see DD in the evening and have dinner together etc. I am envisaging coming home after 5 o’clock anyway.
Parking at work was changed so I would have to park 3 miles away and get a designated bus to work, adding to an already long commute hence wanting more time. Due to covid parking has been reinstated but I don’t know how long for.
With the addition of some later evenings and weekends I will be working 0.58 work time equivalent.
It has really been playing on my mind that I should be working until 4:30 or even 5 and that I am slacking by not? But there’s no way I’d get back in time if I finished at 5.
I didn’t want DD to go to nursery near to work due to unnecessary risk of a long car journey and the one she’s going to is much nicer.
I am also going back 3 days a week. DD will be in nursery for 2 and relatives for 1.
Just wanted to see if I’m being stupid and overthinking as after all I got what I wanted and have a bit more time in the evenings with DD.
those hours have already been agreed so it’s too late to change anyway but I can’t stop thinking about it.
It seems that whatever decision I make I’ll agonise over... welcome to motherhood I guess 😂
Thank you for reading!

You are way overthinking! If those are the hours you want to work, and it works for your family, and your employer has agreed them, that’s fine.

People who work any form of part time hours are not lazy! Whether it’s for family reasons or anything else!

You're not lazy in the slightest. You just want to spend time with your little one and that's completely understandable. I'm due to go back in June and have used my holiday to take a Friday holiday for the rest of the year. I'll work out a plan after that. It's a lot to think about and a big change but I would suggest trying what you've set up and if after a month it's not working for you then you can ask to amend your hours again.

Don’t let your life be ruled by misplaced guilt.

You work the hours you want and that work for you. I WFH part-time and it means I cannot afford much in the way of luxuries (never holidays for instance) but I am very very happy and I live for my dog anyway.

Thank you! Your comments have been really helpful. I know I need to get out of my head about it all.

Think about where the feeling of guilt comes from. With me it’s from my upbringing. Yet I’ve never had a penny from my parents since I was 17. I don’t ask anyone to pay my bills so it’s really got nothing to do with anyone else.

Definitely not being lazy ! Wanting family time is a good thing !