How can I decline a Zoom "Catch up" from a manager without burning bridges?

[RedCheese]

I work on a 8 week contract basis which I'm happy with. Problem is there's a main manager who makes contract decisions and she is all talk and no action. Every promise she's made of a better contract has fallen through, usually after I agree to turn down another job offer. I am not very fit and this woman is very manipulative. I went into one meeting intent on giving her a piece of my mind. As I walked in she shoved a picture of her new born grandson in my face and then started talking about needing my support as she was worried her other grandchild had ASD, knowing full well my son was suspected of having autism. Bottom line, I didn't give her a piece of anything. She rarely contacts me but she's now contacted me 5 times in 2 days. I've secretly applied for a new job. I didn't use references. I don't know if I've been shortlisted or anything so I don't want to burn my bridges with this woman. She asked me for a Zoom meeting to catch up now we are all at home. I answered her work questions and ignored the "Catch Up" offer. She emailed again, asking to chat about work. I told her I was busy what with Work, an ASD child and homeschooling. Next thing she offered a 9pm Zoom Chat with "bring your own glass of wine". WHAT?? I suspect she knows I'm looking for a new job and is playing her usual cards. Problem is, I DON'T WANT to stay regardless of any offer. I despise this woman and I would have to work closely with her if I stayed. I just need to stay away from her until I know if I've got another job. I just don't know how to say NOT NOW when this job offer could be months away. The aggravating thing is, she doesn't want me to leave but she doesn't want me to prosper in my role either. I also suspect that she will refuse to renew my contract (she's in her right to do that) unless I sign to a longer term which I also don't want as it will clash with the new job. How do I kindly reject her offer of catch ups when she's saying it's related to renewing/improving my contract? I've had this conversation so many times and it's all talk on her side and getting me to agree to things I'm not on board with on my side.

Is she actually your boss? Can you explain a bit more about working on an 8 week contract basis? Does that mean your self employed

I think if you don’t have another offer and you need her to renew your contract you need to take the time to speak to her. You can’t just ignore her unless you’re happy to just walk.

I work for 3 months a year for an organisation. Haven't worked for them since 2019.
I have regular Zoom catch ups with my boss there because when they open up again I want to work those 3 months.

I'd do the catch up & make it as brief and factual as possible - not sure ignoring it will help you . You might spend more time trying to give reasons and explain why you don't want to do the catchup than the catch up may actually take you

But I don't know the exact circumstances - just an opinion.

I think if you're on a contract and you want that contract to be extended, you should talk to a manager at their request. The rest isn't important really. Although that catch-up should be in your usual, paid working hours of course.

If you plan to leave regardless of the new job offer then tell her.
If you need to carry on working there till you get another job offer, then suck it up.

Take the meeting and have your camera off, keep a note card handy with the points you want to raise and stick to them.

Do not let her bamboozle you! You can only have change if YOU change because she wont, she knows she is on to a winner manipulating you!

Yes, it's looking like I'll have to engage. I am self employed. I used to work for many different companies/employers but since having a special needs child, I only take on this one contract now with the reduced hours suiting my needs.

View it as a client catch up. Keep it on a professional footing. Say, I can spare 20mins or whatever and stick to it. She has no need to have anything to do with a potential new job but being self employed I know about keeping doors open (even really irritating doors!). You are in control of the conversation. Turn it around. Let her warble on and use loads of "interesting", "really?" Or whatever you like. Stick a post it to the top of your screen saying something that makes you feel positive and she can't see (I like Monkey Pants but only because my son says it). If she asks you something you don't want to answer or isn't her business, that's an interesting question, why do you ask? HR have probably told her to catch up with people and hopefully this is box ticking. Oh and arrange for someone to call you or ring the doorbell if you need an escape plan. Horrid bosses suck but remember good workers are gold dust

I would do it in work time and keep it light and brief. Avoiding her is going to look unprofessional.

Have the meeting, and use it to let her know you aren't offering your service to her after the current contract ends.
You can't avoid telling her.

Nod, smile, grin, divert the conversation where possible. When you have to verbally agree to something do so. When paperwork/electronic documentation arrives bottom drawer it. Ignore the first two requests, then respond with a technical query. Once the query is responded to say you are ready to confirm the contract but personal care circumstances mean that you may not be able to commit to contracts longer than 8 weeks without an early termination vehicle. Basically drag it out and play them at their own game.
Also even as a contractor there is nothing to prevent you withdrawing from a contract part way through, its usually I'll advised did to reputation damage but no company will legally pursue you.